Today, the man who hit on me in a store and asked for my number showed up on my doorstep to inquire about my couch for sale. With his wife. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was talking to a nice guy on a dating app and we exchanged numbers. Later, I got a call. It was his wife asking me to stop talking to her husband. FML
Today, a guy asked for my number at the grocery store, but I politely told him I wasn't interested. He followed me home and took a shit on my doorstep. FML
Today, I got a call from the guy I have been seeing. I wasn't him. It was his wife wondering why I have her husband's number. FML
Today, a guy was hitting on me when I was at a café. I told him I was married, but it didn't deter him, so I told him to go away. Later, my husband came home from work with his boss for dinner and sure enough, it was the same guy who was hitting on me. Suffice to say, it was one awkward dinner night. FML
Today, a guy I went out with twice, and slept with once, came knocking on my door, hysterically crying. Apparently his wife found out about “us” and kicked him out. He’s now asking where he can put his stuff, since he’s now homeless. I had no idea he was married, and she’s now looking to fight me. FML
Today, I saw a shady looking person on the street. As I walked past him, he said, "Hey, come here." Thinking he needed something, I went over. He handed me several pictures of my wife, in public and at home. I've never seen this man before in my life. FML
Today, after a year and half of being single, I was asked out on a date. I was asked by a married man. FML
Today, I was at work, and some people came in looking for a particular couch. After looking for over an hour on the wholesalers website my boss walks over, makes me take my lunch break and then calls over the couple and takes all the credit for the sale. We work on commission. FML
Today, I received a phone call from the number of a "single" guy I met online. It was his wife, who is three months pregnant. She threatened to kick my ass. FML
Today, I found out that the sleazy guy I met with a few days ago decided to move into my home town to "be closer" to me. I've already told him I'm not interested in him, but he still continues to ask me out. FML
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Top comments
iloveanimeshow 6
ask if his wife would like your number too
AnnaDeWitt 27
At least it wasn't to inquire about the used underwear you're selling.
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Comments (40)
The_Appendix_ 13
maybe he got married afterwords
alicat13 12
So he should have showed up without his wife?
sassypants93 17
Am I the only one who thinks he made up the couch thing after his wife found her number in his phone?
sassypants93 17
I'm glad I'm not the only one who jumped to that conclusion. I thought it was kind of obvious there was no couch for sale.
sdroze1389 31
well that couch just became double priced for the bonus of your discretion
RedBullHaze 3
Haha.... Faith in humanity 0%
okudatwo 11
Lol sucks to be him now. What a Moron.
Maccaroney 11
Puh-lease. We need more info. I know girls who think a "Hello" is being hit on.
bnbhimp 10
Please tell me you outted him
Amanda Marie Nehez 13
I would just say I don't have a couch for sale, you asked me for my number. Save his wife some heartache in the future also. Maybe diseases, who knows.