Today, the creepy skin care guy at the mall with the heavy accent asked me if I was pregnant. When I said no he replied "Oh, too many donuts then?" FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, a stranger at the grocery store rubbed my belly and asked me when I'm due. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I was walking through the mall with my husband. We came across a guy who was selling some weight loss pills. He tried to sell me some and I kindly declined. He told me not to deny my weight problems. Thanks. I'm 7 months pregnant. FML
Today, I was at the grocery store, when a little boy looked up at me and asked if I was a prostitute. FML
Today, a customer greeted me with, "So! When's the baby coming!?" I'm NOT pregnant. I just gain weight in my guts. FML
Today, as I was just finishing my grocery shopping, a little girl and her mother walked past. Seeing the little girl staring at me, I waved. The girl then pointed to me and asked her mother "Mommy, is that man pregnant?" FML
Today, I went to my local Walmart to grab a few groceries, and while at the checkout line I grabbed two chocolate bars for a snack. The cashier gave me a look and mumbled under her breath, "Surprise, surprise." I'm pregnant, asshole. FML
Today, a woman at the crowded mall stopped me and told me loudly that if I bought her product it would get rid of my acne. FML
Today, I was helping a women that was looking for skin care products. She kept commenting on the look and "texture" of my skin in a very creepy and almost hungry fashion. I'm afraid that she wants to skin me. FML
Today, while shopping for some bananas at my local grocery store, an old woman came up to me and started rubbing my stomach. She simply asked when I was due. I am a 43 year-old man with a beer belly. FML
Today, I was with my dad at the supermarket and this guy was checking me out. My dad yells at him with a grin, "I know! I make beautiful babies!" FML
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Top comments
BSUbombshell 0
I'm working on the weight loss (although I blame the horizontal stripes on that shirt) Getting pregnant is not an option as a full-time college student with 2 jobs.
mizled 0
#18 shut up. I have chunky friends with great skin. Get over yourself ;)
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Comments (42)
Jonah_Hersch 0
You spelt doughnuts wrond
Jonah_Hersch 0
and I spelt wrong wrong
KiDtastrophy28 0
YDI for not workinq out more yu lazy bastard!! nahh jus kiddinq lol thas ****** up whut he said tho lol
isuckok 11
The letter 'q' is not a substitute for the letter 'g'.
Rinat_fml 26
^^ Fail
atticus41 0
lmao! Casanova, that was badass. fat chicks are gross!
zendaddy0 0
say yes with a sigh
BigBossdanny 0
Fat girls need love to !
Poilo_fml 0
Learn to spell dipshit
iBiteRoses 22
Learn to punctuate your sentences, dipshit.
firedude266 5
No its EPIC FAIL!!!!
donnie111 12
hey! you met my uncle lmao