Intimacy: Today, my wife slapped me for touching her boobs during sex.... - FML

By Anonymous - 11/11/2014 15:37 - United States

Spicy

Today, my wife slapped me for touching her boobs during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 396

You deserved it 6 278

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Same thing different taste

My love language is…

By Time for a divorce, I think - 29/03/2025 21:00 - United States - Edison

Today, I asked my wife for a kiss. She snarled, "I'm your WIFE, just fucking kiss me! You don't have to ask!" Later, I went in for a kiss and she slapped me, then yelled that it was my fault for "getting in her face." FML

I agree, your life sucks 620

You deserved it 96

By Korisite - 30/10/2011 05:31 - United States

Spicy

Today, my wife caught me masturbating to porn. She screamed at me and asked why I would be masturbating when I had her to have sex with. So I asked if she wanted to have sex, she said no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 432

You deserved it 25 060

Action - Reaction

By CaptBlood - 21/05/2021 00:01

Today, before I went to work, I wanted to kiss my wife goodbye while she was asleep, She punched me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 860

You deserved it 192

Consent

By Anonymous - 10/01/2024 05:00 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, my wife asked me to smack her ass as a sign of affection, so I did, she liked it, and we had sex. This afternoon I walked past and smacked her ass again. I now have a bruised eye, ringing in my left ear, and a severe warning to never do that again. Why? FML

I agree, your life sucks 638

You deserved it 207

By Anonymous - 01/11/2014 18:23 - United States - Cincinnati

Today, my girlfriend came over to my place unannounced. She slapped me in the face, said, "You son of a bitch." and stormed off. I have no idea what that was for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 890

You deserved it 5 529

By Anonymous - 19/10/2012 20:54 - Czech Republic - Ceska

Spicy

Today, while making love to my wife, I felt adventurous and told her to hit me. She didn't so much as hesitate before savagely slapping me with her ring hand. Now I'm back home from the hospital, with stitches closing up a huge gash on my cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 589

You deserved it 31 843

By Anonymous - 21/11/2010 08:01 - Mexico

Spicy

Today, I was walking with and hugging my girlfriend at the same time. I tried to be funny and touched her breast, saying "Boob" in a silly voice. In reply, she slapped me in the crotch, saying "Dick" in the same voice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 406

You deserved it 65 887

Rejection erection

By paidback - 25/12/2009 01:10 - United States

Spicy

Today, I rejected my wife for sex. She then started to masturbate next to me. I got an erection. She then rejected me for sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 685

You deserved it 83 502

Cheating with the showerhead

By Anonymous - 12/12/2024 19:00 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, my wife shouted at me for masturbating in the shower, because, "It’s disgusting." She hasn’t touched me sexually in two years FML

I agree, your life sucks 601

You deserved it 129

Last trip

By cap - 09/12/2019 01:00 - United States - Manhattan

Today, I had sex with my wife only to be told that the sex was horrible and to be given divorce papers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 312

You deserved it 334

Next

Top comments

LizetteBerenice 22

Tuesday 11 November 2014 18:48

Women.

5secondsofvvifi 21

Tuesday 11 November 2014 18:51

Maybe her boobs are sore right now? If this is the first time she's done it, ask her about it.

Comments

Niedermayer_20 12

Tuesday 11 November 2014 19:58

That's assault brother!

TrentF13 12

Tuesday 11 November 2014 20:05

Kinky..

jdcg116 10

Tuesday 11 November 2014 20:06

I lol'd. Sweater missiles. As for the rest of it. People do what they are going to regardless of what the world thinks. Smile, sit back and watch the idiocy continue.

pratikp03 22

Tuesday 11 November 2014 20:10

What the...?

Goblin182 26

Tuesday 11 November 2014 20:13

How can you possible have sex without touching her boobs? Where's the fun in that?

rizzkiyoshi 19

Wednesday 12 November 2014 15:09

I don't like mine touched. you can have sex without it just fine.

KayyKaylyn 14

Tuesday 11 November 2014 20:14

Lmao this made me laugh!

crissco 2

Tuesday 11 November 2014 20:33

Sounds kinky! Go on...

dustin007 15

Tuesday 11 November 2014 20:47

Try touching the butt next time ?

FrancoMC 5

Tuesday 11 November 2014 20:48

Are you sure it was her boob?

GanJwAR15 3

Tuesday 11 November 2014 20:51

Get a new wife - it's all good from Diego to the Bay.

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Today, it was my birthday. Two of my best friends forgot it, and so did my grandparents. All of my friends were busy, so I spent it alone in my car. FML

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I believe I can fly...

I agree, your life sucks 257

You deserved it 68

Today, it's been almost five years since the cat I grew up with passed away. I STILL have dreams where she's alive and well, only to be utterly crushed when I wake up and realize it's just that: a dream. I also have dreams like this with my grandma, who died last year. I guess I'll never get over them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 502

You deserved it 114

Today, while getting a breast exam for some suspicious lumps, I was lying on the table with my boobs exposed and I learned my doctor is afraid of wasps. I had to chase the wasp out whilst topless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 601

You deserved it 517

Today, I need a remote position due to a disability, but no company will even try to work with me. My car just died. I'll never be able to live on my own, despite being 30. The worst part? All the people who are gonna reply and call me "entitled." FML

I agree, your life sucks 483

You deserved it 186

Today, my neighbour reported me for touching his wife’s vagina while she was asleep. She wasn’t asleep, she'd passed out giving birth and I had to help get the baby out because the ambulance was late, and her husband was busy vomiting from how slimy and smelly it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 821

You deserved it 108