Health: Today, my uncle had a flashback to Vietnam. I'm now missing a...

By Randall - 25/01/2011 07:28 - United States

Today, my uncle had a flashback to Vietnam. I'm now missing a tooth and have a cracked rib. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 630

You deserved it 3 431

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Same thing different taste

By fuckoffgramps - 24/01/2016 17:10 - United States - New Freedom

Today, I twisted my knee while cutting firewood with my grandpa. The pain was so crippling, I fell over screaming. His response? "Quit your bitching, I had my kneecaps blown off in Vietnam. They had to stitch 'em back on." He's never been to Vietnam, or even out of the country. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 561

You deserved it 2 262

By anonymous - 13/02/2012 11:32 - United States

Today, I cracked a rib coughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 190

You deserved it 2 980

Hangry dude

By Anonymous - 07/08/2021 20:01

Today, I accidentally bit so hard on my fork that I cracked my tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 743

You deserved it 233

By edgyasfuck23 - 13/05/2016 17:09 - United States - Blairsville

Today, I was hiking with my uncle. We were going down a slope, and I kept slipping. He jokingly pushed me just as we approached a big drop. I ended up with three fractured ribs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 603

You deserved it 1 005

By MarBlu - 23/01/2014 12:53 - United States

Today, I came home from the army and explained to my family how tough it was there. Then, as I was walking away, I stubbed my toe on the couch, fell and cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 624

You deserved it 16 444

By Corn-ed-Teeth - 30/04/2019 18:00

Today, I bit into a barbecue-ed corn cob, forgetting I had a filling on my chipped front tooth. I re-chipped it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 485

You deserved it 783

By ouch - 05/10/2015 19:20 - United States - Stockton

Today, I cracked my tooth. I was so tired I put my pretzel stick in my tea and took a bite out of my spoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 868

You deserved it 3 760

By rachlette - 17/04/2015 21:47 - United States - Seattle

Today, I coughed so hard that I fractured two ribs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 500

You deserved it 2 798

By 530gangsta - 25/04/2017 16:00

Today, while having sex I managed to chip my tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 325

You deserved it 414

By Anonymous - 13/05/2019 12:00

Today, after a trip to the emergency room for severe stomach pain and almost passing out in the shower, I slipped on the wet bathroom floor and broke my two front teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 951

You deserved it 119

Rangant 7

Tuesday 25 January 2011 11:49

adult teeth = big $$$ from the tooth fairy :)

afdude87 6

Tuesday 25 January 2011 11:48

well at least he didn't shoot you or something.

Comments

Zodaicz 4

Friday 11 March 2011 18:03

Is your uncle Epic Beard Man? :)

AErockaholic1127 0

Friday 18 March 2011 6:25

Have a flashback of him hitting you, then quickly defend yourself

CHOCOLATE1CE 0

Friday 20 May 2011 4:02

welcome to nom bitch!

mattyboonie 0

Sunday 5 June 2011 3:00

pennamay 11

Wednesday 2 November 2011 13:17

You'll live.

BigSchlong 4

Wednesday 15 February 2012 3:12

**** off #3 he served for us show some gratituded espically because they arent respected as other vets are.

De_Bri 16

Tuesday 4 September 2012 16:01

C M

giggitygoo12 7

Monday 8 October 2012 23:14

And i bet this dudes name is CHARLIE!!!!

dragon8277 9

Saturday 7 September 2013 9:30

As much as it sucks for you I have to say that I think he has it worse :/

K1LLeR_PAnDa 16

Friday 21 March 2014 17:54

Sounds like PTSD

Keywords

Gamers Annoying Video games Abuse Birthday Relatable Social Media Money Scams School Kids Education Parents Public freakouts Health Mental health Grieving Geek Music Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Transportation Cops Bikes Fight Family Work Gross Customers

The Top

Today, I just learned that the silly song my parents taught me as a small child, and would sometimes make me sing for the family, is actually a very thinly veiled series of penis jokes. Why just now? Because I hadn't thought about it for years, until my grandma brought it up at a reunion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 396

You deserved it 74

Today, I took a girl on a date. This girl is tiny, about 4 ft 10 and petite. She ordered a 16 inch pizza, garlic bread, wings, fries, and multiple drinks, and damn if she didn’t eat every bite of it, it was impressive. Until we were screwing later and she vomited the whole meal down my chest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 544

You deserved it 167

The Top

Today, a customer at the bar I work at yelled at me for calling her "Ma'am." I asked what she'd prefer, and she gave me her name. When I called her by her name, she yelled at me for not calling her "Ma'am." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 937

You deserved it 125

Today, I made the "Good luck, We'll miss you!" sign for my own going away party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 847

You deserved it 5 545

Today, I went to my first job interview in months. Just minutes in, a sudden huge, uncontrollable sneeze overcame me. A wad of snot flew out onto my shirt, which I didn't even notice until the visibly disgusted interviewer pointed it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 292

You deserved it 3 898

Today, I had a consultation for an upcoming surgery I need done. The doctor (very handsome and in his late twenties) asked me to flex my stomach and act like I was trying to use the bathroom. As I was enjoying him touching my stomach, I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 992

You deserved it 8 639

Today, I went to get my midterm essay grade thinking I couldn't have made lower than a B. Got to class and my douchebag professor gave me an F. He wrote "Best essay I read, would've been an A if it was the right topic." I wrote on the Industrial Revolution, instead of the Scientific Revolution. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 821

You deserved it 87 554

Today, I was working as the shift manager at my job at a fast food restaurant. Our company policy states that all employees must be clean shaven before coming to work. I had to inform one of the employees, Kris, that they had to shave before clocking in. Kris is a woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 126

You deserved it 3 567

Same thing different taste

Hangry dude

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