Intimacy: Today, my roommate and I got into an argument. He told me he...

By James - 12/08/2011 07:54 - United States

Today, my roommate and I got into an argument. He told me he understood if I didn't forgive him "for a couple of days." He'd confessed to undressing my girlfriend in her sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 614

You deserved it 3 114

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymousse - 13/11/2015 12:34 - United Kingdom - Pontypridd

Today, my roommate came home after a night of heavy drinking and started urinating on my bed. When I confronted him, he just slurred, "Sorry, thought it was my bed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 766

You deserved it 1 552

By sleepwalker - 22/11/2009 01:33 - United States

Today, I woke up in my roommate's bed. Apparently, the previous night I sleep-walked into her room, layed on her bed, and fell asleep. In the middle of her and her boyfriend having sex. He's now going around saying he slept with both of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 702

You deserved it 4 699

By Arizonagirl - 06/11/2016 07:31 - United States

Today, I walked in on my roommate having sex in my bed, because apparently hers is "for sleeping only". FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 291

You deserved it 830

By notacaveman - 16/04/2013 13:27 - Netherlands

Today, my girlfriend confessed that she had drunkenly slept with another guy last night. Since she seemed genuinely upset, and had confessed right away, I decided to forgive her the slip-up. She then angrily broke up with me, because "if I really loved her, I would've been more angry." FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 202

You deserved it 13 444

It's not the size that counts

By Leo Scofield - 29/08/2020 02:00

Today, I came home to find out my roommate had sex in my bed, because he didn't want his date to know he has a smaller bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 029

You deserved it 147

By itsemilyc - 02/02/2015 19:34 - United States - Byron Center

Today, my boyfriend "accidentally" had sex with my roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 846

You deserved it 4 302

By leftwardfoil - 19/08/2011 06:32 - United States

Today, I woke up to my roommate sniffing my underwear. He said he was checking if they were clean, so he could borrow them later. Which may have been reasonable, if I weren't still sleeping in them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 529

You deserved it 3 367

Back and forth and back again

By Anonymous - 07/01/2015 19:37 - Guam - Barrigada

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me over a stupid argument, but after a long day we made up and got back together. Not long afterwards, my friend called, feeling guilty and confessing that he had sex with her after finding out she'd dumped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 984

You deserved it 3 916

By keimA - 23/06/2019 12:30

Today, my new roommate, who seemed to get along with me just fine up until now, has requested to switch to a different room. Apparently, I was making racist comments in my sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 293

You deserved it 381

Wait, what?

By Sally - 24/07/2009 09:04 - United States

Today, my roommate came home and began changing clothes in the same room that my boyfriend and I were in. I quickly got annoyed and angry and when I began questioning her about it she just laughed while saying, "Oh relax, it's not like he's never seen me naked before." FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 357

You deserved it 4 770

spd2fst4u 5

Friday 12 August 2011 18:52

I think I'd have him arrested.

Zero22120 12

Friday 12 August 2011 18:52

How do you not wake up to that?

Comments

portablecupid 3

Saturday 13 August 2011 0:37

Jaaaail. It's especially creepy that he's more concerned about you being mad at him than he is about the fact that he molested a woman. It's like he thinks she's your property rather than a human being.

mikkiMAYHEM 8

Saturday 13 August 2011 0:39

Your roommate? You mean...your ex-roommate?

iPunchedBigFoot 5

Saturday 13 August 2011 0:39

Damn. He would wake up in the ******* hospital. I hope you were argueing with your fists.

portablecupid 3

Saturday 13 August 2011 0:42

Call the cops. It's especially disturbing that he's more concerned about you being mad than he is about the fact that he molested a woman. It seems like he views her as your property rather than a human being. Protip: The person whose feelings matter most here are the molestation victim's, not the boyfriend's.