Today, my roommate and I got into an argument. He told me he understood if I didn't forgive him "for a couple of days." He'd confessed to undressing my girlfriend in her sleep. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my roommate came home after a night of heavy drinking and started urinating on my bed. When I confronted him, he just slurred, "Sorry, thought it was my bed." FML
Today, I woke up in my roommate's bed. Apparently, the previous night I sleep-walked into her room, layed on her bed, and fell asleep. In the middle of her and her boyfriend having sex. He's now going around saying he slept with both of us. FML
Today, I walked in on my roommate having sex in my bed, because apparently hers is "for sleeping only". FML
Today, my girlfriend confessed that she had drunkenly slept with another guy last night. Since she seemed genuinely upset, and had confessed right away, I decided to forgive her the slip-up. She then angrily broke up with me, because "if I really loved her, I would've been more angry." FML
Today, I came home to find out my roommate had sex in my bed, because he didn't want his date to know he has a smaller bed. FML
Today, my boyfriend "accidentally" had sex with my roommate. FML
Today, I woke up to my roommate sniffing my underwear. He said he was checking if they were clean, so he could borrow them later. Which may have been reasonable, if I weren't still sleeping in them. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me over a stupid argument, but after a long day we made up and got back together. Not long afterwards, my friend called, feeling guilty and confessing that he had sex with her after finding out she'd dumped me. FML
Today, I was sexiled so that my roommate and the boy who I confessed my love to two days before could hook up. FML
Today, my new roommate, who seemed to get along with me just fine up until now, has requested to switch to a different room. Apparently, I was making racist comments in my sleep. FML
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Top comments
spd2fst4u 5
I think I'd have him arrested.
Zero22120 12
How do you not wake up to that?
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Comments (213)
klong91 7
Can you say potential rapist? I would throw him out if I were you.
phiend99 4
That's called Felony Assault in legal terms. Lots of serial rapists have been known to have incidents similar to this in their history. They went on to more invasive acts because they were easily able to get away with this. You'll be doing him a big favor if you report him.
sheethapins 13
Not to mention a favor to potential victims.
lovebeam 0
That's pretty ****** up. Switch rooms or keep your gf far away from that creeper
rattusrattus 19
Suggestion: kick out your roommate (provide him with a large cardboard box like the ones fridges come in) and move your girlfriend in. If your girlfriend lives with you, move in a non-perverted friend. Maybe the one who is a eunuch?
duckman9 55
You should never leave your gf unattended!
AshleyCole 0
Preeeeeetty sure she wouldn't woken up from that. I'd be pissed at her too.
jaff23 11
He's a future rapist. Defend your girlfriends honour. You know what you have to do.
Kendrax0x 0
That's disgusting..
Somoajoe11 2
OP you may want to talk to your girlfriend about that.... There is no way you could still sleep!
dstew93 0
she must be a heavy sleeper to sleep through that. i cant even sleep through someone walking into my room.