By cjw - 06/03/2013 00:07 - United States
I agree, your life sucks
46 578
You deserved it
4 313
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well played crazy person. you-1 me-0
That's not well played... That's punching under the belt!!
row74
7
Nice I don't know why this is getting disliked
TeamKelly
10
Troll ex-girlfriend strikes again!
SApprentice
34
Buy a can of spray paint and spray over it. It'll look like hell, but you're going to have to get it fixed anyway, and I doubt you'll be able to make it very far with it the way it is. Oh, and go to the cops if you can. Paint jobs are expensive, and you don't need to deal with that kind of crap.
SApprentice
34
Also, take photos. Lots and lots of photos as evidence. I forgot to add that. You may not be able to pursue any charges against her since these kinds of things are difficult to prove, but the photos could be useful if you need to build a case against her later.
dmoran20
27
Ahhhh screw that, add to it with. If you show me you ****...
Or just add "with purchase of a van" under it, it may reduce your creepy factor just enough.
Get it wrapped, lot cheaper than paint.
the_smart_way
10
Getting a car/van wrapped is pretty much sticking duct tape over a broken duct... The problem will return!
84 my family has been in the wrap industry for 2 generations. I'm not going to argue wether or not wrapping is better than painting, but I will say your comment was extremely ignorant. I suggested he get it wrapped because its faster and cheaper than a legitimate paint job, and if done right can be just as nice.
AliceLockehart
18
Apparently putting a thick layer of Mr Muscle on it can get graffiti off. My stepdads truck got tagged & he used that, it came right off with no paint damage :)
Who pissed in her Cheerios? But really, watch her. You never know what could happen with the crazy ones.
CharresBarkrey
15
She must've had Carnation Instant Bitch for breakfast.
I had a psycho ex, so I understand. He was a different type of psycho, but still, been there, done that.
Epikouros
31
I love your profile pic, #52 :)
Thanks! He's not very cuddly, so it was kinda a surprise when he cuddled me. Kodak Moment.
Just spray paint her address and contact information under the "Free Candy" :)
Better yet, mark out "candy" and write "BJs" and your ex's phone number. If your daughter asks what BJs means, tell her Blue Jeans or whatever.
Even better, spray paint "Free Blowjobs" on all of her clothes and on her face.
delta873
5
you could just sue her...but you would need evidence.
Imhere4fml
24
What part of the fml isn't evidence?
lunaforever21
14
well you cant bring a story to the cops without evidence that she did in fact spray paint his van. he needs actual proof
Well isn't she sweet?
Yes, she's a keeper. The police should keep her away!
You'd better actually carry some free candy on hand, a large herd of children can be deadly in a feeding frenzy.
but what if a parent calls the cops because he'd look like a pedophile
But what if someone had to call an ambulance because children disemboweled OP thinking he had candy? Yeah? What then?
oj101
33
This reminds me of the Child Catcher from the movie Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. Did she also happen to give you a prosethic nose and a black overcoat with a flower hat and a net?
cynide
13
NOO!! I'm 17 and still afraid of that ******* bitch.
jem970
19
One of the best movies ever! But the child catcher... oh god I wanted to watch him fall off a cliff and die horribly. He gave me more nightmares than clowns do now.
So much win! That is what my mom threatened me with as a child lmfao!
lishajoy777
14
I dont condone being a snitch but report that bitch. Thats ****** up!
dontpanic_fml
32
For real? You consider reporting a crime committed against oneself as being a snitch? Really?!
enormouselephant
15
"Yeah man, he came up and stole all my money and my girl! Threw 'em all in his van. But you know I ain't no motherfucking snitch!"
dr_snow_bear
29
I feel for you, and your life does suck, but that's pretty damn funny.
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I agree, your life sucks
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Buy a can of spray paint and spray over it. It'll look like hell, but you're going to have to get it fixed anyway, and I doubt you'll be able to make it very far with it the way it is. Oh, and go to the cops if you can. Paint jobs are expensive, and you don't need to deal with that kind of crap.
Just spray paint her address and contact information under the "Free Candy" :)