Today, my little sister was scared to sleep alone, so my parents made her sleep in bed with me. I barely slept, due to the utter terror of waking up to her chanting into my ear in a low whisper, "This is where you die, this is where you die..." FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my 7-year-old sister had a nightmare, so I let her sleep in my bed. I woke up to her punching me in the face and giving me a black eye. Apparently, she not only screams when she's having a nightmare, she also "gives the bad guy a taste of his own medicine." FML
Today, I was sitting in my bedroom relaxing when I heard my little sister and my brother. Thinking it was cute they were talking again, I was listening. They were not just "talking", they were making plans on how to kill me. FML
Today, I let my little sister sleep in my room because she had a nightmare. She is currently snoring like an overweight 40 year-old man with a cold. FML
Today, my sister turned the volume on my phone way up and changed the ringtone to a woman's blood-curdling scream. I found this out when she called my phone at 2am as I slept next to it. I pissed my pants and fell out of bed screaming in terror. I'll never hear the end of this. FML
Today, I had to put my little sister to bed. Usually my mom sings her a lullaby before she puts her to sleep, so I did too. After I finished the song, my sister looked me dead in the eyes and said, "This is why I tell people we aren't related." FML
Today, I was awakened by a small scary dark figure approaching me while making creepy noises. I screamed, kicked it away, and buried my face under my pillow. Later, after braving up, I turned on the lights. It was my sick 3-year-old niece, now dazed and coughing blood. FML
Today, while babysitting a girl, I told her to be quiet so she wouldn't wake her little brother. In reply, she told me that she would kill me, wake her brother up to show him my dead body, then draw all over my face. I'm stuck with her for another two hours. FML
Today, my daughter hugged me around the neck and whispered, "I'm going to cut your head off." I'm afraid to go to sleep now. FML
Today, I woke up to my little sister strangling me. My parents accused me of making the red marks on my throat myself to exaggerate how bad it was. She's just "going through a phase", they say, and I'm a bad person for punching her to get her off me. FML
Today, I was watching my 3-year-old sister play in the bathtub. She started screaming at her toys, saying "You're staying under the water until you DIE!" She then looked at me and cackled. I share a room with this demon child. FML
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Top comments
littlekellilee 45
You should have started chanting back: "you're going to counseling, you're going to counseling".
PenguinBitch 44
Did the television turn static and did she say "they're hereeeeeee"?
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Comments (112)
ballettillidie 8
...I'll go get the exorcist
Jea2096 11
Carry her to the couch in another room or the floor. Anywhere to keep you safe
BlackPhenom 9
Get out while you can.
titibug823 11
Pick her up, take her out of the room, go back in your room, close the door and lock it. If you cant lock it, put something in front of it, and tell your parents exactly what happened...
Host2phats 21
What if she attacked OP when picked up, that would also put OP in the wrong. I suggest an easier method of superglue and ductape. Apply glue to the hands and head, then put ductape around the legs, that way it can be put back on her aswell. (Plus can you imagine how funny it would be, even in horror movies, if they were confined like that?) I personally think about baby chucky, grunting and all, trying to walk with his legs together and his hands stuck to his head.
kim_larsa 5
Tickle her to death. This will lighten her up!
RodzillaX 30
And run. Run far away.
LoveMusicLoud 12
Another moment I'm grateful I'm the youngest.
semper_amo 14
I'm sorry, but I laughed for a bit and then got really scared after reading the FML. Make sure to not watch The Possession.
davincidasecond 24
Exorcise her.
zango1 15
Back when I shared a room with my brother he would try to convince me I was adopted. Welcome to the wonderful world of siblings.
BellaBelle_fml 23
When I was 6 my older brother had me convinced that he had a twin that lived in the basement and would switch places every other day, lol.