Jenn P
Wichita Falls, United States
Today, my husband drew a penis on every one of my cigarettes. It's a new pack. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
LizzyJones
Derby, United Kingdom
Today, my husband bought me a present for our three year anniversary. It was a pack of 20 cigarettes. I don't smoke. He does. FML
sadwife
United States
It's the thought that counts
Today, I woke up and my husband said he got me a gift for our one year anniversary and that it was on the table. We laid around cuddling and when I finally got up I was expecting to walk out to beautiful bouquet of flowers. I got two packs of cigarettes. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, my husband thought it would be funny to mow a penis into our lawn. I guess he forgot my parents are coming over. FML
tanksfan
This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff
India
Caught in 4K
Today, after secretly smoking for more than two years, I decided to quit. I came home from work to see my wife holding a pack and asking me what was it doing behind the toilet seat. FML
fucker43
This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff
Atlanta, United States
Pranked
Today, my friend made the effort to draw a penis on every page in my analysis textbook in pen. I have to return this tomorrow. FML
Anonymous
Barrie, Canada
Today, my husband ruined the laundry once again. He forgot to empty his pants pockets before washing them. Last time he left an ink pen in them. This time it was a strawberry. FML
fububc
France
Today, I went out for a smoke before dinner. I glanced through the window only to see my husband take my cooking scissors, cut his toe nails and then put them back in the utensils canister without washing them. FML
stopinthenameoflove
Dublin, Ireland
Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML
blushingbride
Alpharetta, United States
Today, my husband decided to pick his nose out before he would kiss me. FML
Peach
Today, my husband finally decided to help with the laundry. He washed a pen and it exploded in the dryer. FML
Top comments
furfantasies 0
Smoking is bad anyways
Chris122990 4
I think he's subtly asking for a *******.
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Comments (307)
Epsilonyx 15
He's implying that smokers suck dick. And have cancer.
pbonham 22
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Why would he be with you if you smoke, GROSS!! D:
kareltje 17
Not that I'm pro-smoking, you should just quit, but really... how old is your husband?
elizabethross 0
Umm..whats actually "******* your life" over is the fact that you smoke..I wouldn't be worried about the little penises If I potentially had lung cancer on the way.
Killer_fel 15
FML means Fail My Life, not **** My Life...
Shelta957 13
No it doesn't.
corleon198425 22
Thats one way to break a cherry
PaperCandles 0
Meanwhile, OP is filling our air with secondhand smoke...
PrincessPesa 20
I bet you smoked them anyways, you dirty little **** smoker.
fuckmebutdontfml 16
I'm gonna take a wild guess and say, he's hintting that he wants you to give him a ********
NiveaKK 9
BJ time!
iHateHippiesToo 6
Your husband is awesome.