You don't?

I always have at least 2, that way when I eat one, the other person wont just have to sit there being jealous. They can have one too!

who carries strawberries in their pocket period!

I'm assuming the pocket period is when the strawberry gets crushed in your pocket?

I mean, you gotta have at least four strawberries. Two side pockets, two butt pockets. One berry just doesn't cut it.

What if its Berry from Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs 2....and this guy was saving his life! Could be? ;)

"you gonna eat your tots?"

I think the better question is who doesn't carry strawberries in their pockets

why not

"Ughhhhhh my freaking tots!!!"

Doing one task so badly that it does more harm than good is not praiseworthy unless you have very low standards.

Yes, but as he said, he was ATTEMPTING to. He might have done it horribly, but he still tried

He has lost the privilege of wearing pants!

I'm sure his wife would be excited about that

I once forgot a small kitten in my pocket. I was just walking around when I hear a purring sound; It was the weirdest thing.

True that

Based on the shit that comes out of my husband's pockets, I'm thinking this is a true statement.

I've had times when i have giant bulges on my thighs, and have no idea what all is in those bulges!

Nah man he's from Witcher 3. Gotta get every single resource.

And then dismantle the strawberry so you get a regular berry and a bunch of straw. *logic*

Why do you look like you do heroin?

That's what I was thinking, too.

Don't give away our secrets