Today, my husband and I were getting intimate when a notification for a game popped up on his iPad. He immediately shoved me aside so he could take care of his baby dragon. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Game on
Today, I realized that my husband has a video games addiction. I am currently pregnant; he brought us to the same country he's in so we can finally live together, only for me to witness him being glued to his laptop all day and all night playing WoW. He's forgotten I even existed. FML
Today, my husband got angry and stormed out of the house because he claims I wasn't pressing the buttons he told me to while playing Pokemon. FML
Today, my husband and I were in bed when the alarm on his phone went off. He then told me that he had to 'sound the horn' and went over to his laptop. Wondering what that meant, I peered over at his laptop. It turns out hunting for mice on Facebook is more important than procreating. FML
Today, my husband and I were in bed, and just as I was about to finish he screamed, "Oh shit! It's 4:15, my strawberries are gonna whither!!!!" and then jumped off me and went to check on his farm on FarmVille. An imaginary farm, on Facebook. FML
Today, I was using my iPad for a presentation. I locked it and left it connected to the projector while I prepared to present. When I turned around to begin, I realized there had been a push notification from Groupon asking if I was still interested in a dildo. FML
Today, I went into labor and got my husband drive me to the hospital. Instead of staying by my side, he rushed back home for a World of Warcraft raid. His excuse? His friends were counting on him and they'd be pissed if he let them down. FML
Today, my husband returned from being away for two weeks. I eagerly got myself ready and sent him a risqué picture so he would come to bed. An hour later, he's on the couch playing Xbox with the message already seen. FML
Today, when my boyfriend said it was time to play with his baby, I figured he was talking about me. He meant his Xbox. FML
Today, I called my fiancé just to tell him how much I love him, as a sweet gesture. He yelled at me for interrupting his video game and blamed my "neediness" on the fact that I'm menstruating. FML
Today, I felt frisky, so I did my hair and put on make-up and some lingerie. I walked into the living room, where my husband was playing a video game. He glanced up, said, "Oh, for fuck's sake." and made me wait nearly 15 minutes for him to reach a save-game point. FML
Top comments
chickenwalrus 14
Baby dragon > sex?
stfu_bam 5
Uh hello! We gotta take care of our dragons! Psh people these days just don't understand. Side note - What level is he on?
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Comments (248)
ArmoredDuckling 0
That's some serious stuff right there.
SLC_grumpypants 5
C'mon over. I'll take care of ya. He can play with his "dragon" ;-)
SockMonkey333 0
Hahaha! Some games are just so addicting
DalPozzo13 10
Maybe if you took care of his baby dragon that wouldn't be a problem
cheymann 4
If you two have kids then he better pay that much attention to them as he does to a stupid reality game
beerankin 0
I have that game. It's amazing lol but that being said, not worth giving up sex xD
NEEPLES 7
Hey it's better than FarmVille.
jack_tells_truth 0
You married him, you deserve it
THE_A_TEEN 28
I told you in a previous fml, people don't show their true colors until later in life. Ex or your biased opinion : If a person gets rape, and they were at the wrong place at the wromg time, do they deserve it? If a spouse abuses their significant other and had never shown any signs of the problem, do they deserve it? Stop using the "you married him, ydi", people don't show their true form until later. Dipshit
bizarre_ftw 22
^ applause
julia_lynn 21
Amen #98. I would have never thought that my ex-husband would completely stop brushing his teeth, or that he would completely ignore me once we were married for a certain period time. Unfortunately, people change, and usually not for the better.
jack_tells_truth 0
I consider crimes different. Food for thought: is it possible the OP has also neglected her husband or let herself go to the point that he isnt as physically attracted to her? Chances are probably. I always find it funny how people get so focused on what's right there. Ask the question why sometimes.
sargentsweener 0
Glad he has his priorities straight
KiddNYC1O 22
Flash him a tit next time.