Today, my husband and I decided to take a romantic trip to the beach. We got pulled over, and shortly thereafter he was arrested. Just so happens you can't miss child support payments for your twelve year old daughter without getting a warrant. He has a daughter? We've been married for 14 years. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I picked up my 17 year-old daughter after a late night movie in down town and got pulled over by a cop. He questioned us for a solicitation. I told the cop that she was my daughter but he said, "So, you're the daddy?" and laughed. Good to know that my daughter looks like a hoe and me a perv. FML
Today, my husband was arrested on 2 felony charges in a sting. We've been married 5.5 years, had almost enough money for a down payment on a house, were trying to get pregnant, and had a non-refundable trip to London planned. We are now broke and on the verge of divorce. FML
Today, I got a phone call from my husband in jail. He was detained for statutory rape. The girl was his 15 year-old coworker at McDonald’s. He’s 42. I can’t tell which is worse, the fact that we have a daughter the same age, or that he actually wanted me to bail him out. FML
Today, I got pulled over for having an expired registration. I also found out my husband hasn't been paying for my car insurance. Luckily, I didn't get arrested because I had my baby with me. They towed my car and gave me two tickets and a court date. Oh, and the cop sent me a friend request. FML
Today, we missed our flights to our dream honeymoon destination, which we were lucky to get with so many flight cancellations, because my selfish stepdaughter anonymously called the airline to report us for drug smuggling, all because I married her dad this afternoon. FML
Today, as revenge for not buying her a new iPhone, my twelve-year-old daughter told her father that my boyfriend, who just moved in with us, is on the sex offender list. My ex turned my boyfriend into the cops and his parole could be revoked. FML
Today, I found out my husband got my 22 year-old daughter pregnant. Not only that, he’s drained our savings on her including a new iPhone and Macbook, designer clothes and handbags, etc. His defense, in all seriousness, was, "She’s not even my biological daughter, chill out." FML
Today, my longtime partner had a mental breakdown and broke into my home. After forcefully having to get him out of my house and dealing with Police all morning, my 16-year-old daughter decided to tell me that she's pregnant. She thought one hour after a break in was the right time to tell me. FML
Today, I found some charges on my credit card for two round trip tickets to Las Vegas. Turns out my daughter and her unemployed stoner boyfriend stole my credit card and flew to Vegas over the weekend to get married. I paid for my daughter's elopement. FML
Today, the cops showed up to my house and served me a child support order from the girl I had a one-night stand with, and who'd promised me she would abort the baby. All this was two years ago. My wife of three years was in the house and heard everything. She packed up her things and told me she’ll be calling her attorney. FML
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Top comments
Muffinish 0
Ouch. **** your life, also **** the 12 year-old daughter's life for having a deadbeat dad.
allmidnighteyes 11
On the next episode of Divorce Court....
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Comments (155)
jessiebearirene 0
well considering that the child's mother was never married to the husband and the OP and cheating jerk were married before the child's conception, the OP is really not the girl's stepmother. i feel bad for the girl and a good person would help financially since there is a child involved regardless of the circumstances. however, the OP is in no way stealing money from anyone, least of all a kid she knew nothing about.
ObadiahtheSlim 2
How can you not know? There are court dates to order the child support. Either you are faking or are very negligent.
gummibehrs 4
You're a dumbass.
Intoxicunt 6
People buried this comment, really? You guys, I think your funny bone is fractured. You may need a cast for that.
SnowByte 0
Hey 89. It's possible that things are run slightly different in other states. Not sure if you are from the same state. We live in PA, but had to deal with the way Maine and Iowa runs things because that's where we were originally from and where my dad was from when the child support things were taken care of. Mom may have gotten letters, but I don't really recall us getting any until I turned 18 and they had to change the child support agreement. It's not hard to hide mail from people. Seeing as she would be considered the step mom, she really doesn't have much say in how everything works out, nor does she technically need to know if the child isn't going to visit. It's really not hard to hide that you have another kid on the side. It depends on how involved the wife is with the household fincances and whether or not she trusts her husband.
KSmindy 0
For all you know he could have never paid child support. The mother of his daughter might not have pressed charges or taken him to court, but the state issued a warrant for his arrest. Don't bash the OP and assume she has her head up her ass when you have no background information.
skullbuster 0
@Ksmindy: Do you hear that, do you, it's your phone ringing - Juan Valdez is calling from his bean plantation in Columbia with a message - Wake up and smell the coffee! You are a woman, aren't you? Because you are suffering from head-up-the-ass syndrome and that mostly afflicts the female population. IT WAS A 12 YEAR OLD KID...if you miss 2-3 payments wages are garnished. If that can't be done due to lack of info, a warrant is issued in most jurisdictions, and the court doesn't let it go for a decade. Certainly not in this day and age. And I really doubt that the baby-mama decided in year 11 of her daughter's life to go after the bum for child support.
ayashe 2
WTF, my dad never paid child support and he was never arrested. Course he also doesn't pay taxes and they haven't arrested him for that either.
Vinny_V 0
whoops!
perfectwinds 0
There are, but he might not have gone or said he was at work. They don't really last THAT long. 3 hours tops, usually. If he didn't go he'd still be responsible, especially if the mom sent papers that he neglected to send back, then it's like saying "I agree."
meanie_monday 0
I hear ya. My dad has never paid a dime so now he owes me 40,000. I wish he would so I can go to college.
OperationNicole_fml 0
It depends on what the mother decides to bring to the attention of the court.
i_is_a_tr00l 0
OH HOT DAMN! THAT IS HIS JAM! There's an perminate solution to this temporaral problem. *Hint, Hint, Nudge, Nudge* Kill the wife and kid. Quick! Run! Don't waste any time! :D
Vagrarian 2
FYL indeed. And people like her soon-to-be-ex-husband can be very adept at hiding things and keeping secrets, even court dates. Perhaps she is a bit oblivious but still, that doesn't mitigate the fact that her husband is a lying, cheating sack of shit. Her only fault is that she trusted him, and I can't blame her too much for that, just hope that she finds someone else worthy of her trust.
gummibehrs 4
I hope you divorce the hell out of him and take all his money for being a cheating scumbag asshole. The bitch he cheated on you with doesn't deserve a dime for being a nasty ***** *****. Don't worry, you'll find someone better than that disgusting douchebag.
all4jjl 0
I just have to say, that if this story is true (because so many on here are just made up bs) then I feel really bad for the OP. To those who say how could she not know? Easy. My husband takes care of all the finances, and until recently, I wasn't involved at all. Some couples have one person who is the sole financial caretaker. Its not uncommon! If this was the case with OP, then its very believable that she could be clueless as to child support payments. As for court dates, he could say he had a work meeting or whatever and instead go to court. It sounds like she loved and trusted him, so why would she question anything?
hi_from_HI 0
He also could have had a separate bank account set up only for child support payments, with the statements and checks going to his work address. Surprisingly, there are many ways something can be hidden if he really didn't want you to know. Sucks though!