Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my...

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 09:53 - France

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 267

You deserved it 29 218

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 24/12/2012 19:44 - United Kingdom - Addlestone

Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm. It was great until mid-gasm when she swung her arm out and knocked me out. She still can't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 826

You deserved it 6 331

By man - 30/10/2009 16:34 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend was giving me amazing head. I was really getting into it, when she looked up, and gave me a thumbs up. I can never take oral sex seriously again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 113

You deserved it 23 450

I am clumsy!

By Anonymous - 16/01/2020 18:00

Today my girlfriend was on top during sex. I went to slap her butt, missed and nailed myself in the balls. We had to stop. She wouldn't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 392

You deserved it 3 160

Repetitive

By justgreat - 24/03/2012 02:30 - United States - Opa Locka

Today, my girlfriend fell asleep while giving me head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 574

You deserved it 6 207

Heated gamer moment

By Anonymous - 16/06/2022 00:00

Today, I thought it would be hot to go down on my girlfriend while she was playing a video game on the PC. Unfortunately, someone killed her in game and she wheeled the chair forward in anger, right into my nuts. It took her a few seconds to notice, then she blamed me for getting her killed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 509

You deserved it 713

Hidden

By bootyislife - 16/06/2015 20:01 - United States - Lynnwood

Today, my girlfriend made me put a blanket over my head while giving me a blowjob because she didn't like the faces I was making. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 664

You deserved it 7 394

By ottawaaa - 27/01/2009 22:26 - Canada

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and as I pulled out to finish I slipped and ended up punching her in the stomach, I came while she was writhing in pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 134

You deserved it 10 844

Milking it

By mperrotta913 - 21/05/2010 15:46 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job, which was great, until she started saying, "Milk the penis… Miiiiilk the penis…" FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 135

You deserved it 14 881

Girl boss

By dating walter white's gf apparently - 06/04/2013 19:13 - United Kingdom

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, I finally managed to give her an orgasm. During that orgasm, she tore out a clump of my hair, causing me to scream in pain. She scowled and said, "Ah shut it, ya little bitch." FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 091

You deserved it 13 413

Love hurts

By wray16 - 26/02/2021 21:30 - United States

Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 812

You deserved it 127

carlycrf 8

Monday 17 January 2011 16:05

did you swallow?

iHaveADream_ 0

Monday 17 January 2011 16:03

hahaha . don't lie , you liked it (;

Comments

musik_prodigy 0

Monday 17 January 2011 17:47

Dude, you gotta laugh at that! :)

Deservesit22 1

Monday 17 January 2011 17:55

You should've yelled Friendly fire!!

kurato 6

Tuesday 18 January 2011 19:22

It his own **** so wouldn't that be a "suicide!" ?

killjoy64 4

Tuesday 18 January 2011 23:04

but she's the one with the gun

Deservesit22 1

Wednesday 19 January 2011 3:16

And I would say she's friendly

hmna 0

Monday 17 January 2011 18:00

What is sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander.

brassknuckles 0

Monday 17 January 2011 18:03

Never accept the tug job! if ya can do it yourself it ain't worth it and sadism like this occurs. Hahaha.

kayPandastyle 15

Monday 17 January 2011 18:06

This is ****** hilarious!! But how would he deserve this?

razeleet 0

Monday 17 January 2011 18:37

There's too many trolls that just like press ydi even if they don't deserve it :P

RedPillSucks 31

Monday 17 January 2011 19:03

Some guys need to feel what their girlfriends feel all the time. It makes them appreciate things more. Not all girls like giving bj but they do it to please their man. He needs to eat some pie in return.

aliaskis 3

Monday 17 January 2011 20:04

Wow 60, I'm honestly surprised that a male could see it from that point of view. Kudos to you for not being narrow-minded. I really think the OP did deserve it. Five bucks he would have been fine with it going all over her face. His bodily fluids are great for other people, but if they get on him his day is ruined and his life sucks? If you can't deal with what the other person deals with, you are selfish and should keep your (disgusting) goo to yourself and your favorite sock.

fearfulsymmetry 1

Monday 17 January 2011 20:17

80: How does OP deserve it? I think it's perfectly okay to have preferences. He doesn't want his bodily fluids getting on him, fine. Some girls don't like when guys try to kiss them after they've gone down on them, that's fine too. Everyone has their likes and dislikes.