Intimacy: Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and as I pulled out...

By ottawaaa - 27/01/2009 22:26 - Canada

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and as I pulled out to finish I slipped and ended up punching her in the stomach, I came while she was writhing in pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 116

You deserved it 10 836

Intimacy

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Same thing different taste

Precaution

By Tai - 31/10/2010 13:30 - Australia

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for coming inside her because she didn't want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. She's on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 534

You deserved it 9 933

I don't understand!

By Anonymous - 28/11/2019 18:00 - Canada

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she did not want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. She's on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 896

You deserved it 618

Love hurts

By wray16 - 26/02/2021 21:30 - United States

Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 803

You deserved it 124

I am clumsy!

By Anonymous - 16/01/2020 18:00

Today my girlfriend was on top during sex. I went to slap her butt, missed and nailed myself in the balls. We had to stop. She wouldn't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 380

You deserved it 3 139

By Anonymous - 27/01/2013 06:03 - United States - Demorest

Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She heard the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 028

You deserved it 3 906

Get on with it

By KaRaSu - 22/11/2008 12:24 - France

Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, she suddenly said : "Are you going to be done any time soon?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 887

You deserved it 7 099

Routine

By youaresodumb - 27/09/2010 04:19 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I finished too quickly and apologized. She said she was used to it by now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 426

You deserved it 34 319

By RC3Welly - 09/03/2009 22:58 - United States

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 636 377

You deserved it 797 384

By RC3Welly - 09/03/2012 22:58 - United States

I agree, your life sucks 739

You deserved it 1 680

By douglisk1994 - 10/02/2009 00:07 - United States

Today, I drove my girlfriend home around 11 to her garage where we start to have sex. When she comes to climax she slips and hits her head. Her parents heard the crash and came down, we were both still naked and she was unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 94 158

You deserved it 20 230

WhatThePhuc 0

Sunday 8 February 2009 7:38

SURPRISE CONTRACEPTION!!!

kleokriesel 0

Monday 9 February 2009 9:32

that's what you get for using the pullout method FAIL

Comments

WhatThePhuc 0

Sunday 8 February 2009 7:38

SURPRISE CONTRACEPTION!!!

kleokriesel 0

Monday 9 February 2009 9:32

that's what you get for using the pullout method FAIL

Ceaston87 0

Tuesday 24 February 2009 5:45

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

Dirrtyrice 0

Saturday 28 February 2009 10:54

HAHA...uterine punch contraceptive...nice idea

Laid2Rest6661 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 8:17

How the hell did you manage that one?

Durf 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 8:52

The last part made it even better. "I came while she was writhing in pain."

leadninja 0

Monday 16 March 2009 5:33

SMASH THAT BABY RIGHT OUTTA HER

superzombie 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 6:47

Next time, before you punch her, you should ask her "Who's the boss" so she gets the full Tony Danza experience.

jsmith1199 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 5:10

punching her in the stomach: the best morning after pill money can buy patent that shit

ell3x0 0

Friday 20 March 2009 19:56

awe, at least you care about the fact that you hurt ur gf. most dudes, like the ones who commented on here, dont care as long as they nut. thank you for being decent.