Intimacy: Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and as I pulled out...

By ottawaaa - 27/01/2009 22:26 - Canada

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and as I pulled out to finish I slipped and ended up punching her in the stomach, I came while she was writhing in pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 178

You deserved it 10 862

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Same thing different taste

Love hurts

By wray16 - 26/02/2021 21:30 - United States

Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 825

You deserved it 132

By Anonymous - 20/06/2009 11:13 - Switzerland

Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty hot, so I decided to smack her butt. I missed. I smacked my balls instead. Real hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 803

You deserved it 97 694

Seventh heaven

By Egyptian ToyBoy - 17/12/2019 20:00

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. She had such an uncontrollable, aggressive orgasm that I'd be celebrating my efforts, if only in the process she hadn't knocked over my new expensive laptop, which then split in half. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 876

You deserved it 470

By Anonymous - 27/01/2013 06:03 - United States - Demorest

Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She heard the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 050

You deserved it 3 908

Precaution

By Tai - 31/10/2010 13:30 - Australia

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for coming inside her because she didn't want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. She's on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 590

You deserved it 9 943

I don't understand!

By Anonymous - 28/11/2019 18:00 - Canada

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she did not want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. She's on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 017

You deserved it 639

Girls will be girls

By Anonymous - 13/01/2021 08:01 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She had her whole hand in me kind of deep. It was hitting everything inside me and triggered me to poop a little bit, on her arm and the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 965

You deserved it 747

I am clumsy!

By Anonymous - 16/01/2020 18:00

Today my girlfriend was on top during sex. I went to slap her butt, missed and nailed myself in the balls. We had to stop. She wouldn't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 400

You deserved it 3 179

The heat of the moment

By righthook - 08/04/2015 19:56 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He was about to make me come so I lifted my arm above my head with pleasure. I accidently punched him in the eye, hard enough that he had to stop for a while because he said he felt dizzy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 889

You deserved it 8 654

Routine

By youaresodumb - 27/09/2010 04:19 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I finished too quickly and apologized. She said she was used to it by now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 449

You deserved it 34 359

WhatThePhuc 0

Sunday 8 February 2009 7:38

SURPRISE CONTRACEPTION!!!

kleokriesel 0

Monday 9 February 2009 9:32

that's what you get for using the pullout method FAIL

Comments

WhatThePhuc 0

Sunday 8 February 2009 7:38

SURPRISE CONTRACEPTION!!!

kleokriesel 0

Monday 9 February 2009 9:32

that's what you get for using the pullout method FAIL

Ceaston87 0

Tuesday 24 February 2009 5:45

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

Dirrtyrice 0

Saturday 28 February 2009 10:54

HAHA...uterine punch contraceptive...nice idea

Laid2Rest6661 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 8:17

How the hell did you manage that one?

Durf 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 8:52

The last part made it even better. "I came while she was writhing in pain."

leadninja 0

Monday 16 March 2009 5:33

SMASH THAT BABY RIGHT OUTTA HER

superzombie 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 6:47

Next time, before you punch her, you should ask her "Who's the boss" so she gets the full Tony Danza experience.

jsmith1199 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 5:10

punching her in the stomach: the best morning after pill money can buy patent that shit

ell3x0 0

Friday 20 March 2009 19:56

awe, at least you care about the fact that you hurt ur gf. most dudes, like the ones who commented on here, dont care as long as they nut. thank you for being decent.