Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to help me get over the fear of my upcoming rectal exam by surprising me with one of her own halfway through our lovemaking. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my girlfriend stuck her finger up my butt while giving me a hand-job, promising it would feel really good. It just felt awkward and made me need to poop. FML
Today, while performing a rectal exam on my female patient, I inadvertently said, "Okay, you're going to feel some pleasure now." I meant "pressure". Her husband was in the room. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted to try anal, praise the lord hallelujah. As we were getting into position, she let out a rancid fart she'd been saving for my face. Apparently it was revenge for me seeing Mamma Mia 2 without her while she was at work yesterday. FML
Today, I wanted to wake up my sweetheart with a surprise blowjob. He surprised me as well with a knee to the stomach. FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me head. When I came, she was scared of the "stuff" that came out. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML
Today, my girlfriend of 5 months walked in on me naked while I was on the toilet. She proceeded to tell me that she wants to watch me taking a dump. I'm both shocked and too hard to do what she told me. FML
Today, my boyfriend had to give me an enema. FML
Today, after years of faking pleasure with my boyfriend, I visited the gynaecologist. As soon as she touched my privates I instinctively let out a fake moan. FML
Today, my fiancée got out of the shower, completely shaved. I went over to her, wrapped her in a hug and asked her what the occasion was. She pulled away and said that she had a gyno appointment. My fiancée will clean up for the gyno, but not for me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
deviable 9
Bow chika bow wow.
9987coldplayfan 1
Did you return the favor?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (174)
briannaahhhh 0
kinky(:
GAMaeishere 0
"Oh. That's not what you meant when you asked for butt sex?"
Zaira921 7
I thought of The League as soon as I read this.
Lunachic91 6
When the situation is reversed, and the woman is 'surprised' like that, the comments aren't so light and funny. OP, your girlfriend knew this was something you were not into, and did it anyway. FYL
draven844 1
Three words. ****. That. Shit. (no pun intended)
danbo659 0
i dont see why guys so sensative to there butts. us ladies go to the gyn and then u guys wants us face down butt up soo whats the deal here
ohmandapants 17
SURPRISE!!!!! :D
mini_mouth22 0
She is a keeper haha
Cheesecakee 11
How did she do that without you realizing it ?? Pretty sure if i tried that with my boyfriend it wouldnt happen....
ikickgingers 15
I feel dirty reading your fml. I think i like it?