Today, my girlfriend lost one of her rings. I found this out as I overheard her gushing to her friend about how I must have borrowed it to find out what her ring size is. I have zero interest whatsoever in the sick and utterly immoral institution of marriage. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, in preparation for proposing to my girlfriend, I borrowed one of her rings so I could discreetly get her ring size. Not only have I now lost the ring, which turns out to be a keepsake from her dead grandmother, I still don't know her ring size. FML
Today, I got home and my girlfriend was wearing the ring I bought last week. Apparently she found it and thought to herself, "Fuck it, we’re engaged now so I’ll just start wearing it", completely bypassing the actual proposal part of getting engaged. I’m actually really mad at her right now. FML
Today, my girlfriend found the engagement ring I'd bought. She looked at it and said, "This is pathetic. You shouldn't even bother." FML
Today, my girlfriend turned down my marriage proposal because the ring I gave her was bigger than the one her sister got at her proposal. Apparently she wouldn't be able to brag to her sister without "looking like a bitch for having a bigger ring". FML
Today, I found out that my engagement ring was actually my husband's ex-fiancée's. FML
Today, I found out my fiancée has been sleeping with the salesman I bought her engagement ring from. He knew. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend was going to propose. He'd bought me a beautiful white gold ring that I never got to see. His estranged mom stole the ring. FML
Today, I’m supposed to be proposing to my girlfriend in an hour, but my stupid, air-headed bitch sister found the ring, tried it on, took photos of her wearing it for her social media, then got on a plane to go on her girly holiday, but never took the ring off. The bitch thinks it’s funny. FML
Today, at work, my vindictive, cheating ex made me clean and inspect her new wedding ring. FML
Today, I saw a picture of my ex giving her new boyfriend an extremely familiar ring. Upon zooming in, I realized that it was the engagement ring I gave her that she claimed to have had stolen from her home. FML
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Top comments
chuka81 27
First, the fact that you don't like marriage doesn't make it sick or immoral. Second unless you have made it amply clear to your partner that you don't ever want to get married, they are entitled to think that if things go well, the relationship will eventually lead to marriage. Your girlfriend seems oblivious of the fact that you're so anti-marriage, so it's a **** her life from me
Amama_fml 30
Then maybe you should let her know that so she doesn't keep waiting for something that's not going to happen.
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Comments (271)
FEATHDUCK 19
My comment will probably get removed, but how did this make it past the moderators with a racial slur in the title?
merryhappy1887 20
You sound like a giant douche. Hope she dumps your miserable ass.
DevilsShadow 5
How is marriage sick and immoral? You can choose to not get married and still have a happy relationship, but don't call what people find so much joy in, sick and immoral.
IorvethTheXolo 8
Yes, totally sick and immoral to sign a piece of paper that signifies your commitment to your best friend that you want to spend the rest of your life with. How horrible. Do it or don't. I don't care, but to have such a hostile view of it is pretty sad.
laden_swallow09 35
You use the words "sick" and "immoral", OP, but I don't think it means what you think it means. I have no interest in marriage either, but damn!
FringeFanGirl 6
Your username is on point, by the way
KingDomino 9
Sounds like you're using your girlfriend solely for sex, you sick ****.
rattyrayvn 21
I don't plan to get married, but there are ways to express that without sounding like a huge neckbeard.
Az109 0
Nic E
aspecialspecial 21
So do tell what is sooo " wrong" with marriage? If you font want to be married fine, but don't be a dick and act like there is something wrong with officially stating that you love someone and want to spend your life with that one person. So again, what is wrong with marriage? Hell I just feel bad for her since it seems that she actually wants to be married.