By Anonymous - 22/12/2010 13:09 - United States

Spicy
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Instead of having breakup sex, she tidied my room. She said it gave her more pleasure than any time we'd ever had sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks 29 125
You deserved it 14 017
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Top comments

dudeitsdanny 9

People actually expect breakup sex? Really? She's dumping you, and you actually expected her to still have sex with you? Am I missing something here?

192 5

Comments

my_user_name 7

Bingo! She could have just dumped you and left. Now you have a clean room! Better than nothing.

33 0
Bosia 0

Break-up sex? Last time I broke up with a girlfriend, I got a broken nose, not a broken hymen. Kidding! ...Okay, not really.

19 3
zaadam2 5

#1 - What state do you live in? Because if people have breakup sex when they break things off with one another then I am soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo there. In all seriousness though, I honestly hope you weren't expecting anything after getting broken up with. Hell the best I got after a girl broke up with me was a kiss on the cheek and that was all. #2 - After a comment like that, thats rough to live with. But I really REALLY doubt though the sex was the main reason why she broke up with you. It was probably one of the reasons, but not the whole story. But other than that, it takes experience and just time to get your sex life going.

10 5
LoLlersnakes 0

Awesome. I would have told her to make me a sandwich and then asked her for her best friend's phone number.

17 28
Doortje 29

Wow, you must REALLY suck in bed. I hate cleaning.

31 0
generalasskicker 12

dammit my comments won't show she added that comment to try to hurt him on her way out the door it was an unnecesary show for something that was ending but hey find somebody that's not a bitch she waited till it was over meaning one of 2 things it is either not true or she said it out of spite meaning she is either a bitch for lying to Hurt you or a bitch for being spiteful it's over this is all of course working under the assumption you did not wrong her for exp cheating on her with her mother or sister or just cheating but assuming that's not the case yeah she's a bitch

0 10
a_girl_i_know 0

Wow 22, ever heard of periods and commas?

33 0
boopityboppity 11

22 doesn't like them because they remind him of his missing marbles.

14 0
dudeitsdanny 9

People actually expect breakup sex? Really? She's dumping you, and you actually expected her to still have sex with you? Am I missing something here?

192 5
bludragon486 0

And it's awesome. It's like a hooker without having to pay!

4 27
mouxouxou 11

So this is a kind of recipe?After a break up comes sex,or in that case cleaning the room (...) after the sex comes another girlfriend who doesn't look like a hooker until you break up with her (...#9) and then what?? Charity????....

7 2
i_love_jb 0

agree with 6. like seriously ? but op, that sucks.

5 0
vince1612_fml 0

i also ses no logic in the concept. When I break up with someone the last thing I want is to sleep with the other. I can see how the one getting dumped would want to but seriously.. It can't be made sound like a normal expectable thing.

34 1
GTmustang07 0

breakup sex is real and sweet but not as sweet as makeup sex..that's one mans opinion though

5 17
boopityboppity 11

32, let's hope it's *only* one man's opinion, shall we?

15 1
kickboxingchick 5

I agree with 6

1 0
mc1900 4

sounds like a win win situation to me. maybe send me her number.

2 11
perdix 29

You came out ahead on that deal -- these days a good maid costs more than a cheap *****. And as long as you pay them, the cheap ****** won't criticize your awful sexual performance, in fact, they prefer it -- it helps them improve turnover ;)

13 7
derek8888 0

dude that's messed up. I don't understand why she didn't just leave...

7 1
HSOMGF 5

You are not entitled to sex. Be glad she cleaned your room and get over it.

38 1
Ninjafriends 1

Would you rather be bad in bed with a dirty room, or bad in bed with a clean room?

19 0
Ninjafriends 1

Yes, his choices suck. But at least he can ********** in a tidy environment.

15 0
unidentified_sta 5

I can't handle such choice, someone choose for me.

3 0
HomeAl0ne 20

Can I have a clean girl who's dirty in bed?

12 1