Today, my girlfriend and I decided to exchange presents for our birthdays. I spent $100 on perfume and Victoria's Secret clothes. She bought me a bag of lifesavers, then asked me to leave because she wanted to take a nap. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my girlfriend came home and announced that she'd just bought a $40 pair of flipflops. She then declared that I wouldn't be getting a birthday gift this year due to budget shortfalls. For hers a month prior, I'd got her a $300 piece of jewelry. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went to his best friend’s birthday party. He got her red roses, a necklace and $100 Victoria’s Secret Gift Card. This year he forgot my birthday, gave me a hug and told me to leave his apartment because he had homework to do. We’ve been together for two years. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a $100 gift card for Victoria's Secret. Suspicious, I checked the receipt he'd left in the bag. Turns out he had bought it during the two weeks we were broken up for some other girl who rejected him, so decided to give it to me instead. FML
Today, my girlfriend is locked in the bathroom crying because I didn't buy her anything for Valentine's Day, even though Friday, at her suggestion, we agreed not to exchange gifts because both of our birthdays are a week away. FML
Today, my girlfriend bought herself a brand new iPad and iPod Touch, and returned my aging iPod and Kindle, which she constantly steals for her own use. She considers it my Valentine's Day present. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me lingerie from Victoria's Secret. He then added that his mother picked it out. FML
Today, I bought my girlfriend a very expensive necklace. I gave it to her thinking she'd be extremely happy. Instead she was mad at me because my gift for our anniversary was better than hers. FML
Today, because it was our first Christmas as a couple, I was careful to get my girlfriend what I considered to be a very thoughtful gift. She opened it, took one look at it, made a face like I'd just kicked a puppy, and told me that in future it would be better if I just gave her money so she could buy her own presents. FML
Today, after buying my girlfriend an expensive gift for her birthday, cooking her breakfast in bed, and treating her all day ending with dinner and cake at her parents, she burst into tears and said the whole day was ruined. Why? I forgot to buy her a birthday card. FML
Today, I thought it would be nice to take my girlfriend out to a nice restaurant for my birthday. She got a little headache after we ordered, so she went outside to get some air. I ate a $100 meal and had Happy Birthday sang to me by the restaurant staff. Alone. FML
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Top comments
ayumi_fml 0
i would've taken back the presents while she was sleeping..
Bubs_fml 0
Imagine if the genders were reversed here? I mean, people are pissed now, but there'd be an epic thousand-comment ****storm going on in here if a guy was the culprit in this FML.
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Comments (149)
randki 0
Shes about to break up with you, or is cheating on you. No ifs ands or buts.
MonkeySpeaks 4
100 bucks at victoria secret? Sorry dude, I shop there regularly - unless you got her the crappy stuff the perfume itself will get you toward 100 bucks and most of their actual clothing is 25-100 a pop.
MonkeySpeaks 4
@ 53, and 80 - when is the last tim eyou toppe dby a VS? They have a full cltohing line, bathing suits, panties, bras, lingerie, workout clothes, pajamas, cosmetics, perfumes, etc. Ever hear of VS Pink line? Sporty and cute clothing line and bra/panty line for any occassion. I wore my VS sweatshirt the toher day. I lay around in my VS pj pants all the time and I will be wearing my Pink Sweats tomorrow when I wake up to go out on the boat. I only own ONE nice lingerie set from them....and yet I shop there mutliple times a year. For more than just bra and undies (in fact, i buy more CLOTHING fromt hem than lingerie)
reallychick 0
i agree with #1 but wouldn't have waited for her to be asleep. you should have called her a gold digger and took your shit back.
LauRAWRen 0
that's ridiculous. what a bitch. get your shit back.
dirtygerbil08 1
Yeah, for Valentines' Day I spent $80 at Victoria's Secret and $20 on flowers for my girlfriend. She modeled her lacy little gifts for me and we had sex on the floor. Less than two weeks later, she dumped me for another guy. (But he doesn't want anything to do with her!)
VioletED 0
victoria secret is cheesy
_kaitlin 0
Dump. Her.
31Problems 0
Maybe she really didn't want to take a nap, maybe she had to go cry, because she had no money to buy you a present, and all you gave her was something really you just bought for yourself-she probably could have used the money-you suck
chuteboxe39 0
sounds like your girlfriend is a real bitch. wouldn't rule out the possibility of her cheating on you either. if you were smart, you should gtfo asap by the sounds of her