Today, my girlfriend and I decided to exchange presents for our birthdays. I spent $100 on perfume and Victoria's Secret clothes. She bought me a bag of lifesavers, then asked me to leave because she wanted to take a nap. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my girlfriend came home and announced that she'd just bought a $40 pair of flipflops. She then declared that I wouldn't be getting a birthday gift this year due to budget shortfalls. For hers a month prior, I'd got her a $300 piece of jewelry. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went to his best friend’s birthday party. He got her red roses, a necklace and $100 Victoria’s Secret Gift Card. This year he forgot my birthday, gave me a hug and told me to leave his apartment because he had homework to do. We’ve been together for two years. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a $100 gift card for Victoria's Secret. Suspicious, I checked the receipt he'd left in the bag. Turns out he had bought it during the two weeks we were broken up for some other girl who rejected him, so decided to give it to me instead. FML
Today, my girlfriend is locked in the bathroom crying because I didn't buy her anything for Valentine's Day, even though Friday, at her suggestion, we agreed not to exchange gifts because both of our birthdays are a week away. FML
Today, my girlfriend bought herself a brand new iPad and iPod Touch, and returned my aging iPod and Kindle, which she constantly steals for her own use. She considers it my Valentine's Day present. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me lingerie from Victoria's Secret. He then added that his mother picked it out. FML
Today, I bought my girlfriend a very expensive necklace. I gave it to her thinking she'd be extremely happy. Instead she was mad at me because my gift for our anniversary was better than hers. FML
Today, because it was our first Christmas as a couple, I was careful to get my girlfriend what I considered to be a very thoughtful gift. She opened it, took one look at it, made a face like I'd just kicked a puppy, and told me that in future it would be better if I just gave her money so she could buy her own presents. FML
Today, after buying my girlfriend an expensive gift for her birthday, cooking her breakfast in bed, and treating her all day ending with dinner and cake at her parents, she burst into tears and said the whole day was ruined. Why? I forgot to buy her a birthday card. FML
Today, I thought it would be nice to take my girlfriend out to a nice restaurant for my birthday. She got a little headache after we ordered, so she went outside to get some air. I ate a $100 meal and had Happy Birthday sang to me by the restaurant staff. Alone. FML
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Top comments
ayumi_fml 0
i would've taken back the presents while she was sleeping..
Bubs_fml 0
Imagine if the genders were reversed here? I mean, people are pissed now, but there'd be an epic thousand-comment ****storm going on in here if a guy was the culprit in this FML.
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Comments (149)
Adnilinda 0
Ur single now, right? I would have dumped her. And take the presents with you, she doesn't deserve them.
linzhart333 8
god. what a stuck up bitch...telling you to leave and not being grateful. but you WANTED to give her an expensive gift. if you expect an equally priced gift in return, set a limit to gift prices for each other, so one person doesn't get screwed.
Kiebland 0
Lifesavers? **** yeah.
squeaky_fml 0
I can't know for sure, but I'm going to guess that you guys haven't been dating very long at all, and she doesn't have much money (probably a student), and you were just being creepy and pushy by giving her all that stuff. My last birthday, I specifically told my then boyfriend not to spend much money on me, and he responded by buying me $100 worth of dinner and concert tickets, plus a diamond bracelet. I'd also recently told the guy that I hated bracelets. It made me feel like a *****, and also made it abundantly clear that he didn't listen to anything I said. I'm definitely on the girlfriends side here. She probably told you to leave because you made her uncomfortable and angry and she needed some time to cool off. Don't be surprised if you get dumped soon.
xRibbin_Jibbinx 0
I'd take the perfume, pour it all over her while she's sleeping and stick 2 lifesavers up her nose.
Sassfactory 0
Leave her, sweetheart. The disparity between how into each other you are is too great.
Slicer316 2
Dump the ***** she's just using you for your money. LIFESAVORS HONESTLY?????? thats just sad, get someone not worthwhile unlike that *****
myhrgacceber 0
please, dump that bitch.
myst0ry 0
What a bitch...
Meta_fml 0
I think your girlfriend is kind of ungrateful, but why the hell did you buy Victoria's Secret clothes as a supposed present to _her_? Just admit that the lingerie is actually for your benefit.