Today, my friends dared me to answer the door naked for the pizza guy. I heard the doorbell but when I answered, it was the little boy from next door participating in a fundraiser. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, my girlfriends dared me to answer the door naked to the cute pizza delivery guy. He laughed it off and thanked me for the awesome tip. An hour later, police arrived because my nosy, frigid, couldn’t-get-laid-in-a-brothel neighbour reported me for public indecency. FML
Today, I was naked, still deciding what to wear, when the doorbell rang. I grabbed the closest thing to cover up with: my Snuggie. I answered the door, it was kids asking for donations. Without thinking, I turned around to grab my purse. FML
Today, I opened the door to what I thought would be a group of trick or treaters. It was actually a naked man. He wanted to come in. FML
Today, my friends and I decided to prank the pizza guy. Once he rang the doorbell, I jumped out of the bushes wearing a scary mask and holding a fake dagger. He almost instantly whipped out a Taser and got me right in the collarbone. FML
Today, I lazily answered the door in my pajamas. It was my elderly neighbor asking to borrow a can opener. Despite the strange and unwarranted scowl she was giving me I obliged. It wasn't until after she had left that I notice my penis was completely sticking out through the flap in my pants. FML
Today, I realized that the only boy that shows up at my door is the pizza boy. FML
Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML
Today, someone knocked on my door. I yelled "Yeah?" while getting up, since it was locked. My grandpa walked in, as I apparently didn't actually lock it. I was naked. FML
Today, in the spirit of Halloween and to get back at a child who repeatedly pressed the doorbell until I showed up, I quickly opened the door and yelled "Boo!" The child ended up being carried away crying with wet pants by a mother threatening to sue. FML
Today, I was dared to walk home through a rough part of town. My rep hung in the balance, so I accepted. A kid kicked a football in my direction, so I kicked it back at him hard. It hit him in the nuts, and the next thing I know, I'm running for my life from three bald, shirtless, six-packed thugs. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Jeffo193 13
I think you know you deserved that one...don't think the kid did though.
unknown_user5566 27
He got to see the goods without even taking you to dinner first? Score 1 for he neighbor boy.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (153)
redbandit9877 12
This is why I want to do delivery instead of counter, they get all the fun stuff
annie_nk 23
I delivered for 4 years. You aren't missing out on much. Trust me.
Sandsh8rk 36
'Mommy Mommy! Today I saw a penis!'
Pandacupcakelove 26
So it's that easy to make you do stupid stuff? People just have to dare you? Come on -.-
Metallica36176 16
You know, my parents taught me to check who is on the other side of the door before answering. Not so much on your end? And I'm assuming he was young, was his mother with him? Did she see you too? xD youve made that boy either very happy or permanently scarred.
HappyBeach 4
Get ready to tell neighbors "Hi i'm OP and i am a registered sex offender."
SApprentice 34
Exposing yourself to a child. Way to go. Maybe try not doing what your friends dare you to next time, before you go to prison?
TurtleSmile 14
Dear Penthouse forum..
Sandsh8rk 36
If the pizza man did come you better have given him a tip...
generationaliya 7
Nothing screams 'desperate' like opening the door for the pizza guy stark naked.
FaygoAndMiracles 18
YDI. Even if it hadn't been the neighbor, you could have made the pizza delivery guy REALLY uncomfortable- especially if he had been gay or asexual or something.