Intimacy: Today, my fiancé had to perform his first prostate exam. He told...

By Anonymous - 12/03/2013 18:27 - United States - Westerville

Today, my fiancé had to perform his first prostate exam. He told me he was quite nervous about it, so I reminded him that he did fine on his first pelvic exam last month. His response: "Yeah, but I've had my hands up plenty of vaginas already." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 717

You deserved it 6 190

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Same thing different taste

Tough

By prostate - 08/06/2009 13:48 - United States

Today, I got prostate examination for the first time. Now I can't decide what's worse, the fact that I got a boner when the doctor inserted his finger, or the fact that my wife told the story to pretty much everybody we know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 409

You deserved it 7 057

By taperjeangirl - 21/02/2009 23:15 - United States

Today, I was telling my mom that I was really nervous about going to the gynecologist for the first time. Her response, "Oh don't worry, it's not like it's the first time you've spread your legs!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 766

You deserved it 10 556

By Jesse - 10/05/2012 21:22 - United States - Bothell

Today, I had to get a prostate exam. Right before the doctor started, he told me that if I found it awkward at all, I should just imagine I was being probed by aliens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 067

You deserved it 2 419

Prostate implies an Antistate

By artsmart1 - 06/03/2010 00:40 - United States

Today, I went to go see a specialist for my prostate and was told he would have to do an exam before I could leave. Having had this checked just the previous year, I was more than a little irritated. As I was bent over the table the Dr. said, "Now, just pretend I'm Angelina Jolie." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 411

You deserved it 2 947

By medstudent - 04/02/2009 21:24 - United States

Today, it was the first time I ever saw a vagina in person. It was during medical school training on how to do a pelvic exam. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 441

You deserved it 9 959

By ReallyBro - 21/03/2012 07:27 - United States - Keller

Today, after a year of coaxing, I got my boyfriend of 18 months to agree to have sex with me. He decided his first course of action was to try to shove his flaccid penis into my unlubricated vagina. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 513

You deserved it 11 371

By Anonymous - 14/08/2016 06:16 - United States - Warrensburg

Today, I shaved my vagina for the first time ever. Had sex with my husband and then asked if he liked that. He said, "You've done that before, though". I haven't. We've been married 15 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 325

You deserved it 1 837

Ice-breaker

By bye loser - 20/10/2014 09:28 - Canada - Abbotsford

Today, I went on a first date. Everything was going well until he asked me, "So, what's the biggest thing you've stuck up your vag?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 738

You deserved it 3 969

By shocked - 25/08/2011 18:10 - United States

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to help me get over the fear of my upcoming rectal exam by surprising me with one of her own halfway through our lovemaking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 756

You deserved it 5 124

By Anonymous - 19/06/2012 03:33 - United States

Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 425

You deserved it 4 625

XDsmileyDX_fml 24

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:22

Practice makes perfect.

DocBastard 38

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:33

I teach my medical students that prostate exams are a lot like weight lifting - there's a lot of grunting and moaning and sweating, and one guy always feels tired at the end.

Comments

etchsanity1 11

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:22

Why is this an FML?

XDsmileyDX_fml 24

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:22

Practice makes perfect.

lilhellian 26

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:25

Friends can certainly help!

ColdplaySucks 18

Tuesday 12 March 2013 23:03

No one is perfect. Why practice?

Wimoweh 10

Wednesday 13 March 2013 1:27

But practice makes perfect. So why not?

wlddog 14

Wednesday 13 March 2013 2:18

I always thought it was perfect practice that makes perfect. Just because I practice holding my breath under water doesn't mean I will grow gills.

kishorekumar_a 10

Wednesday 13 March 2013 3:15

44 - It's a never ending cycle, ultimately meaning you should never stop practicing... he he he

Bubbelz 25

Wednesday 13 March 2013 4:33

No it's not. Once someone practiced enough, someone's perfect. Inb4 Pokemon references.

Synistiel 14

Wednesday 13 March 2013 12:21

44- I've always been told "Practice doesn't make perfect. It makes you better at something." To me there's always room for improvement, even if its a tiny adjustment.

saraitkddh 47

Tuesday 22 October 2013 0:56

and nobody perfect so why practice?

killatrev 4

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:22

Third!!!

young_weezy_fml 3

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:23

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JenkJenks 6

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:27

I don't think the aforementioned vaginas he had his hand up had anything to do with his job.

icryevrytime 7

Wednesday 13 March 2013 1:10

Ha, aforementioned vaginas

tararochelle 18

Wednesday 13 March 2013 9:10

But last month was his first pelvic exam, so the vaginas he's referring to were for fun not work.....

DanielleinDC 33

Wednesday 13 March 2013 16:38

I think he meant that having his hand up a woman's ****** to do a pelvic was no big deal because he's had his hand up many vaginas in the context of pleasure. Someone should remind him that there is a difference between sexual touching and clinical touching.

Panda_Shy_Haven 17

Thursday 14 March 2013 0:39

Haha ****

ninjaqueen101 18

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:24

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squideth 18

Wednesday 13 March 2013 7:03

Yes, heaven forbid people enjoy their sexual desires (as long as they're responsible). Don't ****-shame.

Welshite 39

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:24

As long as he says "no ****" before doing the examination, he'll be fine.

XDsmileyDX_fml 24

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:26

Your profile picture... Get out...

Cartera 10

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:33

Welshite, did you do 10 pounds of meth before writing your profile description?

lilhellian 26

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:41

15 It was catnip..

ManInTheMachine 19

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:53

I hope to God your account was hacked, Welshite.

lilhellian 26

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:54

26 Bad thing about it is, no swaggot has enough brains to hack..

ilovedinosawers 17

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:58

No he was on dandruff.

The_Water_Ninja 9

Tuesday 12 March 2013 23:13

his description... I almost feel as it I'm being trolled...

profligatesoul 18

Tuesday 12 March 2013 23:45

That could work for a lot of situations

SammyS2012 21

Wednesday 13 March 2013 0:32

it seems hacked to me... i liked his profile before and it doesnt seem like him; unless he did a complete 180

DocBastard 38

Wednesday 13 March 2013 2:48

Fear not for Welshite. That last sentence of the first paragraph absolutely stinks of KaySL. She must be up to her old hax0ring again.

sux4u121 10

Wednesday 13 March 2013 5:22

I don't kniw what to say here welshy, I imagined this and I chuckled, guess it's not everybodys' cup of tea.

teareb 9

Wednesday 13 March 2013 8:51

Or he doesn't have to say anything since its his job.-_-

Marvin_Kay 10

Wednesday 13 March 2013 21:01

Guys its a reference from the boondocks

bubbalax9 9

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:26

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sofiery 9

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:32

who says that the OPs a man/lesbian?

nakiarain 9

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:35

I don't think it matters. Correct me if I'm wrong but hearing about your partners past isn't really pleasant for anyone..

ProctorKProducti 5

Wednesday 23 April 2014 23:00

Who says she's straight?

xTrepidation 14

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:31

Just tell him to avoid eye contact afterwards.

HeartOfLead 24

Wednesday 13 March 2013 3:32

False, OP's fiancé must keep constant eye contact during the entire exam. He might as well be taking him to dinner afterwards!

BronayPonay 6

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:31

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boarderlyne17 8

Wednesday 13 March 2013 5:10

I fail to see how that makes it any less bothersome.

Cbizzlez 10

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:32

Doesn't surprise me, doctors can get laid A LOT

DocBastard 38

Tuesday 12 March 2013 22:42

We can? Hm, that's news to me. I'm afraid **** has lied to you. I assure you that the nurses are not dropping their panties in the elevators at the sight of us.