By tobuscus9412 - 22/03/2015 01:04 - Australia - Woronora

Today, my father decided it would be a good idea to give me the sex talk, at Target, at the top of his lungs. FML
I agree, your life sucks 33 050
You deserved it 3 326

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Did he use objects from the shelf as visuals too?

"So son, you take this here (picks up shoes) and stick it into here (points at socks). AND that is how babies are made"

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Well this can be logical. You sure wouldn't forget it and he would be educating others at the same time.

If only OP lived in Canada, the conversation would've never happened...

Return the favor by having loud sex while he's home and make sure to yell "AM I DOING IT RIGHT?" if he comes to investigate.

Please let there be an update that confirms OP did this.

Did he use objects from the shelf as visuals too?

op's dad proceeds with a pool noodle in one hand and a hula hoop in the other.

a pool noodle in a hoola hoop?! holy cow that's like a hot dog in a hallway.

Well, maybe he wanted to be a sex ed teacher and this was the closest he could get to being one.

This is a prime opportunity to do something equally embarrassing for him, ask him questions about porn, blow jobs, best sex positions, etc. Make him tell you. In a public location.

"So son, you take this here (picks up shoes) and stick it into here (points at socks). AND that is how babies are made"

*fast forward to OP's first time* "Are you sure you want to do this, honey?" "I'm sure." *pulls out shoe and sock*

Sounds like he targeted you as his victim for the day

Did he use props? But seriousy, fyl indeed, op.

This seems more like a Wal-Mart conversation.

that's when you avoid eye contact with anyone cute