By linn - 27/09/2012 20:14 - United States

Spicy
Today, my mom decided the time was right to give me the sex talk. Towards the end, I had to excuse myself to the bathroom. As I came back, I overheard my dad telling my mom that I'm so unpopular, the only time I'll get laid is when I'm being put in a coffin. FML
I agree, your life sucks 42 135
You deserved it 3 210
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Top comments

footballfreak65 6

That's horrible!!! I mean really clever but he's an ass.

236 8

Comments

Oreohugzpenny 4

I got the talk at 14

1 29
LarryLaDouche 13

I never received one of these fabled sex talks. I got a demonstration of what sex was when my friend used my thermos and lunch box as props. In the 3rd grade.

56 3
kristabelli 19

I think this is one of the worst FMLs I've ever seen... sucks that your dad would say that about you, OP. :(

18 4
ALuminousHusky 5

I didnt get the talk! my dad came in saying 'Son, we need to have a little man to man chat.' I just looked him dead in the eye saying 'No we don't.'

32 1
onlychildFTW 33

I never had it. Seems like it would be awkward anyways. Plus we learn all that stuff in like grade 4 now.

0 5
LiyIa_fml 8

I learned in 6th grade. But I'm sorry about that OP don't let it get to you. You'll find someone eventually!

3 0
nado13579 12

I learned right before starting fifth grade. It was the most traumatising conversation I've had in my entire life. ._.

1 0
footballfreak65 6

That's horrible!!! I mean really clever but he's an ass.

236 8
DeadxManxWalking 27

Have to admit I did chuckle.

42 1
Inheritance 10

He really laid it all out on you didn't he? Such low standards from your dad.. Fyl..

1 17
MissMae93 23

46 - Nice attempt at stealing 1's thunder.

14 1
lebronesque73091 12

Oh damn, that's harsh. Sorry, OP.

1 0
Hiimhaileypotter 52

That's terrible :/ sounds like something my father would say.

50 1
ClassyCommando 13

Fathers are sort of like assholes. I mean, it makes sense that we have them...but they're still assholes.

16 2
KrazieKleo 13

But he has an asshole which in turn makes him one too.

9 1
Inediblepeaches 15

Too much brain.... My logic hurts....

7 1
MrBond007_fml 6

So prove him wrong, bring a girl home, and just to get back at him for the comment, screw her on his bed.

20 39
MrBond007_fml 6

My bad, same applies backwards. I'm sexist and automatically assumed that op was a guy. Yes yes I know... Ass out of you and me...

47 8
supportcommand 17

Maybe she should bring home another chick. That'll really give dad something to talk about.

73 1
BeachBoi_Alex 7

Yea she should get ****** on his bed. But then he'll probably whine about that as well.

2 9
LoveGuru69 0

what if OP is lesbian? than Mr.Bond would be correct, and the other two commentors would be homophobes

2 0
BBoxall 0

You definitely don't deserve that! Sorry:C your dad seems like a jerk. Confront him about it!

7 19
beccaishereyay 11

I hate these fmls about parents talking shit. It's so sad.

72 3
MDTeddy 13

Why would they hate their kids so much? I have no idea.

5 12
hopsinlove17 26

He doesn't hate his kid...just has little faith in them

15 0
perdix 29

Your mom's sex talk must be pretty great that you had to go rub one out in the middle.

94 21
Forlorn420 9

Good enough that I'd bet dad was listening

2 17
ArmlessSkydiver 7

who knew girls could rub one out..

2 6
misspulkadot24 17

Your picture works splendidly, I love it :)

8 0
PYLrulz 17

The other thing that popped into my mind was making a Family Guy reference, and saying the OP was Meg

7 1
Unbweavable 17

Got get knocked up to prove him wrong. *sarcasm*

9 18
cutenessizme 4

Oh wow, you guys have the same picture. For a second I thought that person replied to themselves.

22 0