By both are dimwitted - 23/12/2014 18:32 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my ex called, saying she's 3 months pregnant. She seems to have forgotten that we haven't been in the same room, much less friends, in over a year. My dimwitted wife thinks the baby is mine. FML
I agree, your life sucks 42 402
You deserved it 4 639

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Wow, sorry to hear that OP. Hope your wife figures it out lol

Can't resist-*legitimately

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Wow, sorry to hear that OP. Hope your wife figures it out lol

get her a math tutor

Most likely she's thinking he cheated.

i wonder what gave that away!?

hopefully both the wife and ex figured it out at same time...that would be even better

your profile picture is life.

i feel bad for the baby. hopefully it gets his/her sense from the father.......who ever he is .-.

I'm sure she'll come to her senses sooner or later. Let's just hope she doesn't take it too seriously.

I mean maybe your wife thinks you might have cheated? you honestly never know what goes threw her mind but I'm sorry your ex is a total idiot! I hope you guys get threw this. stay strong!

It's "through", not "threw", for heaven's sake...

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I agree... sometimes the phone screws it up, or we just legitly cannot spell.

Can't resist-*legitimately

#13 sorry I can't impress everyone. no need to be so salty calm down I wasn't trying to write an English paper. have a great day!

#31 the best way to avoid making those mistakes on English papers is to not make them a common practice in the first place. You wouldn't need to change up your language just to write a paper that won't have a thousand red marks, if you went through the effort of actually typing words correctly when you type every day.

Plus isn't the whole point of posting a comment to communicate your thoughts or feelings? If you want to communicate, you should always use the best language for the situation. FML is a place that poor spelling and grammar is looked down upon. To communicate here, you need to be correct in those things. (missed the edit time)

oh the irony..

I think some people miss the point though. Sure fml is a place to express your views, so why does everyone have to express them with the same grammar. What if English isn't their first language. Wouldn't you find it embarrassing to consistently be reminded of the fact that your grammar isn't up to par. It's fine if you're just trying to help someone out but most people now constantly harp on grammar as a way to belittle others. Not saying that's necessarily what's going on, but it could be misconstrued in that way.

#35 I get what you are saying and I made one mistake and he was very rude about it. he could have just pointed it out instead of being all "oh for heavens sakes". yes I used the wrong word for it. calm down people.

35 - you mean 'threw the effort'?

You people make me sick! Honestly, as long as it conveys a message, who cares ffs!! Who do you even think you are to someone else ...

Please don't blame the phone for making your mistake. Albeit the phone will change a slightly misspelled word into something completely wrong, the phone does not change "through" to "threw". Also, that "oh, I'm not writing an English paper" thing is really old. Whether or not you're writing an English paper or an FML, when is it fine to use the wrong word for what you're trying to convey to the reader? Plus, correcting someone's spelling isn't as bad as correcting the whole sentance because it's in two diferent tenses. People are free to post as they please; If people are going to post about relation advice then people can post grammar advice. Who knows, maybe you might learn a thing or two from a Grammar Nazi. rant done.

I can't resist either... 'Nazis'. There's no ' in Nazis.

#50 sentence*, different*, relationship advice*, grammatical*.

OMG, just shut the fuck up

You know what they were trying to say, pull the stick out of your ass and move on.

With all the ranting you are doing about others taking the time to use the correct grammar you could at least take the time to spell sentence correctly.....

#50 "sentence" ;)

I'm no grammar specialist but I'm pretty sure one should start off a sentence with a capital letter. Especially when ranting about the exact subject. :-)

Honestly shut the fuck up you absolute dick fucks. Who cares??? Literally who cares? Is it fun insulting other people's intelligence for no reason other than it making you feel better than yourself? Does it make up for you being made fun of in high school or something like that?? Stop being pretentious little shits and calm the fuck down for once.

What a funny fml though, right

I hope your wife decides to trust you. im sorry that happened

Dimwitts indeed.

poor OP

You need to choose smarter women my friend .

Stupid girl (your ex)

I think she knew what she was doing.

I think the wife was rather stupid as well...

You could always get a blood test, although I really don't think that SHOULD be necessary, you wife should trust you. Tell your ex she's not going to sucker you into paying child support for a kid that's not yours.

theyre also free of charge if they come back negative. do it.

I mean his wife should trust him but some solid evidence (I.e. the negative paternity results) would put her mind completely at ease.

Ummm, the wife may think he's cheating and/or lying, so she isn't necessarily dim-witted.