By hmb - 16/09/2010 18:50 - United States

Today, my dog used my stomach as a trampoline to jump onto the couch. I wouldn't have minded so much if I wasn't still recovering from having my appendix removed. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 078
You deserved it 2 919
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Top comments

perdix 29

So, even the dog can tell you're not a lady, but a tramp.

41 3
I_iz_B_a_troll 23

Y'all are a bunch of *******, LYING DOWN to recover?? What in the **** is wrong with you?! I mean seriously, lying down? Whenever I'm trying to recover, I do so by running across america 47 times while carrying an elephant in a forrest gump t shirt over my shoulder, and when I finish that in approximately 32.00839721 seconds flat, I bench press your mom 1 and a half times, cuz that's all I'm capble of. when I finish with that, I go deep sea diving in a sea of naked Martian women, isn't quite as nice as it sounds, I mean they have 8 vaginas each, but it's like Russian roullette as to which one will or will not tear off your penis-- not fun, trust me! But it's not too bad when you get used to it, as long as you drink long enough for them to look relatively like humans, which isn't too hard from the front, but you don't want to look from behind or you'll turn to stone. good for me though because I'm not a huge fan of anal, unless the girll is a buttterface, which land o lakes or I can't believe it ain't butter is a decent substitute for a butterface prostitute, if you're interested, I can hook you up with captain hook and his unicorn, now that's a bad ass wingman right there. Your penis will thank me!

10 0

Comments

imaginaryvoice 18

Rub his nose in your stomach and say, "Bad dog! Outside!"

0 0
I_iz_B_a_troll 23

you deserve it for having a-pen-in-ur-dicks

0 1
YANKSFAN4EVER 0

why were u on the floor?

1 1
Jessi2487 0

22 i was thinking the same. ydi op if u were in bed ur dog wouldnt have jumped on ur freshly removed appendix space.

0 1
averageirishman 0

mm I do that often, I mean lying on my back on the ground in front of the couch close enough for a dog to jump off you onto it.

0 0
b_anhero 0

7 win. thats some pragmatic ish right there.

0 0
bishoprsv2 0

What are you, some little girl, OP? When my appendix burst, I ripped it out the excess organs and licked all the poisonous liquids. Then I stapled it shut and played extreme fist bump with my stomach. I won.

1 0
deathcab7 0

49, your bloody stories are getting old :/

0 0
zomgbies 17

Well what in the shit are you doing laying on the ground NEXT TO THE COUCH?! Lay ON the couch. Dumbass

0 0
Trollz4daLULZ 1

YDI for having a dog, having surgery of ANY kind for ANY reason, for having furniture in your house (wtf is wrong with you?!), and for even having an appendix in the first place, you mutant freak!

4 1
kathira120 3

is it just me or is anyone else sick of these stupid 'YDI' things? how does op deserve having their stomach jumped on after surgery? joke or not, it's stupid!

1 1
Trollz4daLULZ 1

YDI for getting so wrapped up in something some random stranger said on the interweb.

3 2
FFML_314 11

Kathira, move along. You are not wanted here!

0 0
MetalFish 0

I see Kathira's point, most of the time they are trying to be funny but epically failing. Some are genuinely hilarious though. I can take it or leave it. Back on topic: I modded this one :D FYL OP, but don't lie on the floor when your dog is about anyway!

2 1
moon21_fml 0

quit posting these stupid "YDI" things people! It's really annoying!

1 1
MnBran6 0

you're all noobs if you don't know who trollz is.

0 0
WearingHats 14

Trollz, you're comments are way more clever than all the other wannabe "YDI" kings out there.

0 0
katey280 0

what's op? I've been trying to figure out what it is for a month now :|

0 0
JayBear14 11

loll at 8 ur effing crazy it cracks me up

0 0
hidingoutt7 0

well I hope your ok

0 0
shacoria 0

Dogs are horrible. They should really all be killed

0 0
colorguardgeek 8

owwww!!! m'sorry.

0 0