Today, my daughter told me that she liked her "other daddy" better. I don't know who's she talking about, but my wife is doing a good job telling her to be quiet. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Mystery man
Today, as I was taking my three year-old daughter home from daycare, she asked where her daddy was. I tried to tell her that I was her father, but she answered, "No, not you! My other daddy!" I've got some talking to do tonight. FML
Today, my 5 year-old informed me she likes her "other mummy" more and wants to live with her instead. I need to have a long conversation with my husband. FML
Today, I explained to my 5 year old daughter that her older sister from my husband's first marriage lives with her mommy, and my daughter lives with us. She exclaimed, "It's not fair! I want two mommies like she has! Can we swap, I like her mommy better than you anyway!" FML
Mommy issues
Today, as I was picking up my 7 year-old daughter at my ex-husband's house, my daughter started crying saying that she wanted to stay with Daddy forever. I asked why. She said her stepmom was a better mommy. Apparently, the woman who broke up my marriage is now a better "Mommy." FML
Today, after spending time with my daughter and painting her nails she gives me a hug and says, "Mommy I love you, but I love daddy much better!" FML
Today, my 2-year-old daughter overheard my wife and I arguing and fixated on one particular insult my wife threw at me. Now my daughter won't stop saying "Daddy a numbnuts", always with a big smile on her face. FML
Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML
Today, my four-year-old daughter called me by her mom's new boyfriend's name. Three different times. FML
Today, my daughter asked me to braid her hair. When I was done, she said Daddy's girlfriend does it better. I wasn't aware we had an open marriage. FML
Preference
Today, my daughter ran up to a librarian working in the kids section and screamed "MOMMY!" and hugged her. She looked at her and said "I'm not your mommy." My daughters reply: "I know. But you're better than mommy" FML
Top comments
mufasaniqqa 13
aw **** man, sorry about that.
MondRubberduck 24
That´s no problem. You know. Kids are easy to bribe.
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Comments (134)
Vagitarian1 10
Don't be sad or mad. You now have license to cheat. Go out and get yourself laid.
duuuh1 11
Do you have any relatives around a lot? When my nephew was four he told me he had "two daddys, Dadda and Babba" (his grandpa) and that he liked Babba better.
cwaziemamma 16
Wow.... You need to have a heart to heart with your wife... Send your daughter to your parents so she isn't around for the argument
Federgirl 19
Oh my gosh I'm so sorry. That's awful.
Omniprism 15
Hey paranoid, she could be imagining another dad too. Kids are notorious for having invisible friends.
mkayden 23
Your wife shouldn't have involved your daughter in her cheating scandal, it must be really confusing for your daughter.
trina0626 3
naybe she watched the movie coraline to many times
ayanna_wright 15
You should just dump her
Maaska 16
Definitely follow up
blackrose3033 4
Sorry to hear that she's involved your daughter in her affair. That's aweful!