Today, my daughter's guinea pig got stuck behind the wardrobe, squeaking its head off. I tried pulling the wardrobe towards me to free him, but couldn't take the weight of it all, so it fell over, smashing the TV. The guinea pig is fine. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my mum asked me how the guinea pig was doing. We don't have a guinea pig. Turns out she had volunteered me to look after the next door neighbor's guinea pig when they were away and 'forgot' to tell me. They have been gone two weeks. FML
Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out the lights and got into bed. I'm 20 years old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. FML
Today, I learnt that my guinea pig can shoot poop across the room like a tiny brown torpedo. How did I find this out? It landed in my coffee. It wasn't until after I'd finished my coffee that I noticed it. FML
Today, I woke up to a squeaking noise and the feeling of something furry on my cheek. I smiled, thinking it was my guinea pigs nosing me awake. Then I remembered that my guinea pigs were in their cage on the other side of the room, and opened my eyes to see the biggest rat ever staring right at me. FML
Today, I found out that my beloved guinea pig has impaction. For the rest of his life it will be my duty to clean out his rectum manually every month, or every week/day if it gets worse. FML
Today, I was cleaning out my new guinea pig cage for the first time because one of them had babies last night. After using a spatula to shovel up the 3 inch layer of crap and placenta, I decided to hose it down. The hose came on so hard, it sprayed the dung and birth water all over my face. FML
Today, I agreed to buy my girlfriend a piggle for Christmas. The pig is miniature. The noise it makes is not. Oh, and I just found out it's not living with her, but with me. FML
Today, I found a decomposing hamster deep in my closet. My daughter had hidden "Peach" after accidentally killing it and said it had ran away a month ago. And I'd believed her. FML
Today, I was at my uncle’s farm and his pig had piglets. They looked super adorable, so I picked one up. The poor thing started shrieking bloody murder. Mama pig wasn’t too happy. I have the stitches to prove it. FML
Today, my husband was using the microwave when we suddenly hear a huge 'POP'. The good news is we found our daughter's missing hamster. FML
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Top comments
lkrofct 0
Better the TV than the guinea pig.
tally7mir 3
Aw, just get another TV. A life is more valuable than a TV, even if it's not a human life
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Comments (70)
yottskry 0
So what? A TV is just "stuff". A guinea pig is a little life :)
Unleashed27 0
I hate guniea pigs. TV FTW!
Tequilamockngbrd 7
Am I the only one who read "squeaking its head off" and expected the FML to end in actual decapitation?
Kisama_fml 0
Expecting? No. Hoping? Yes.
CallMeHush 1
To tell the truth I was looking forward to a little decapitation and a few jokes about not losing our heads over it.
jeane123 6
thank god the guinea pig is fine!
blastvortex 4
Comparing the prices of the two items, it would've been cheaper to replace a squashed guinea pig, although you really shouldn't have moved the wardrobe if you weren't entirely certain you could handle it in the first place. YDI. ... Oh, and your daughter needs to take better care of her guinea pig if she's to keep one.
orangejuice12345 0
awe ): but at least you saved your little girls pet! :D
leppy27 0
okay, so for all of you cruel people who would rather have the guinea pig die and keep a tv...ugh! i bet her daughter loves her little guinea pig and a tv is replaceable..a guinea pig isn't!! yeah you can buy a new one, but is it the same guinea pig? no. is there a million versions of one tv? yes.
ojosverdes26 6
Wow... FYL and the life of the TV. That's too bad... if it had been the other way around, you could've cooked the guinea pig for dinner like they do in Peru. Yummy pig is yummy.
ohlookasaraah 0
YDI for the way you implied that the precious TV shouldn't have been wrecked at the face of the guinea pig. This would be an FML if the GUINEA PIG got squashed.
suesblues 0
Actually, an FML would have been you having to explain to your daughter how her guinea pig got squashed by the wardrobe.
youratittybaby 0
#22, you're dumb