By stubblebutt - 13/11/2009 12:17 - Australia

Today, my date arrived far earlier than expected to pick me up. Apparently my mother decided to show him to my room anyway. When the door swung open, I happened to be butt naked in front of the mirror, trying to pick out an ingrown hair on my bum. FML
I agree, your life sucks 46 721
You deserved it 5 988

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Please tell me this wasn't a first date.. cause if you are concerned with an ingrown hair on your ass for a first date, you have issues.

You should have just looked at them and said with a straight face "Well, can you help?".


first! that being said... thats the kind of stuff u do in the bathroom... well, at least now any future amorous encounters will be less awkward as he's already seen u in ur birthday suit

Reyo 2

I'm questioning why you didn't have your door closed. I won't even risk my PARENTS seeing me do harmless stuff like going number one.

Are you illiterate? "When the door swung open" alludes to the fact that THE FUCKING DOOR WAS CLOSED. And OP, holy crap that is a true FML.

l.m.a.o. #30 LOVE it. this made me faLL oFF mY cHaIR.

You don't have to worry about being naked in your own room! Or you shouldn't have to worry, anyway.

wow #30 so hateful

Well, my parents bash on the door then just swing it open. It's a common occurrence. One time while getting changed my dad bashed on the door and attempted to come in. I pushed the door right back sending him out of the room and shouted "I’m getting changed, **** off for a second".

your parents tolerate you yelling "Fuck off" at them? Aren't you a little ungrateful shit... If I was a parent I wouldn't want my kid telling me to "**** off" after knocking on their door in my own house...

I am with #73. If I had told either of my parents "Fuck Off" it would have been "Teeth Out" for me.

Trebie 6

Lol, I agree, telling your parents to "Fuck off" would NOT be acceptable in my home... But, I agree with you #69 on that being annoying. My dad has this habit of knocking on the door and pausing until I say "Hang on a second"... And then just coming in. And my mom always just barges in. Even though I always knock and wait for a response from them when trying to enter their room.

gods_hunter10 0

omfg if I said **** off to my parents.... all my shit in my room gone no comp or shit! my ass would be so red!!

I agree with 73, if I ever said that to my parents I would be picking my mouth up off the floor from another state! imagine daffy ducks bill when he got it shot off- it'd be like that. and op- unless you're a land manatee, which being Australian I doubt (better diet than we Americans) I'm sure your date loved it....except the hair part. gross.

victoria4161993 0

ew who grows hair on their ass

I like hairy butts and I can not lie my brothers and I can't deny when a girl walks in with a hairy ass you get a BONER.

sammeeleigh8 0

at least you dad ATTEMPTS to knock. my father walks stealthily down my hallway and opens the door quickly to catch me if I am doing something wrong. he has come in on me naked before and I bitched him out b/c he deserves it.

Please tell me this wasn't a first date.. cause if you are concerned with an ingrown hair on your ass for a first date, you have issues.

plutosaplanet 0

she didnt say she needed it removed for the date...she was just trying to remove it.....havent you ever had to pluck a hair and you do it when you remember and have time. gosh

ElMundio87 0

honestly? no


Ingrown hairs can hurt. And chicks who put out on the first date are awesome. I should know, I am one.

Know what else is awesome? Syphilis.

Veunz 4

That's kinda slutty. Yea easy sex is ... easy, but it's just a red flag. My first girlfriend said she wanted to make love to me at the end of our first week after meeting. We got in a 2 year relationship. The last 7 months of it she was putting out within the first week to five others. Just saying, girl that puts out that fast is a major red flag!

mmmno. ive never had an ingrown hair. thanksss..

if I told them that, my parents would take turns THROWING me through walls and tables then I would be rushed to the emergency room and they would tell me that since I'm so disrespectful I should find new parents..and I'm serious they would..

well i think we have a winner here for this weeks most sluttiest comment! congratulations

Gravitational 8

Well Then.... What now..

Did you post about your hair on facebook? I just saw something extremely similar on Lamebook. Coincidence? Or Fake?

You need a lock on your door! btw first?

testing_fml 0

not-first fail.

what if the door dosnt have a lockl, mine doesnt

arienh4 0

Then, as the comment above you said, she NEEDS a lock on her door.

Annettepierce 0

my mom would never allow me to have a lock on my door! some parents are like that. btw... first fail.

Gosh you guys are lucky.. I don't even have a door! :'(

My parents never gave my room a door because they wanted to make sure nothing happened. I'm in a wheelchair. What is going to happen?! My sister has a door, she's not in a wheelchair.

Dude if there was no door to my room and I was in a wheelchair I would flip the **** out at ma paps

avfcfan89 0

you must be expecting a fun night on your first date. if i was him, i would have left and said that's ******* gross.

Hopefully, since the cat was out of the bag anyway, you asked for some help.

Sorry perdix but your or so clever comment has confused me. Please explain it to me?..... in english. thankyou.

dwindling81 0


Play on "bum"

Veritas143 0

haha great now I'm imagining some naked lady picking at an ingrown hair on a hobo..thanks

perdix 29

OK, The_pleb, In British English-speaking countries, "bum" is slang for the buttocks. In America, we use the word to mean a beggar, a hobo, an unemployed transient. I pretended that I wasn't aware of that different meaning of the word "bum."

SeximusPrime 0

oh ROFL, sucks to be you.

You should have just looked at them and said with a straight face "Well, can you help?".

And this is why people should learn to knock before they enter someone's private room...God only knows what the person in there is doing. On the bright side, hopefully he liked what he saw? Besides you plucking at an ingrown hair, of course...

s1w1111 2

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

Only if you **** your cousins is it "buck naked".

mj2123 0

Both are acceptable. Don't be an asshole. Oh, sorry. Arsehole.

testing_fml 0

is there such a thing as proper english with a bloody idiom? and the only proper version is "buck"? what are you, from west virginia?

Skull_300 0

What the Fuck is wrong with West Virginia?

skull_300: a LOT.... :D

There's a lot wrong with West Virginia.

ShadowlessSpear 21

Is everyone going to ignore the fact that you bums missed the joke?