Today, my dad got me to dance with him. After about a minute of waltzing to a song on the radio, he stepped away and said, "You smell bad. You need to take a shower." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad got mad at me because after he told me that when I'm not going anywhere to stop putting on perfume, I told him I wasn't wearing any. I took a shower this morning, my hair is still wet. When I tried to explain this, he got pissed and said that I just needed to accept when he told me I was wrong and shit. FML
Today, my five-year-old son told me that I smell bad and asked me to take a shower so I wouldn't attract bugs into the house. I had just showered. FML
Today, I found my dad using my bathroom. Why? Because he "had to take a crap" and didn't want to stink up his own bathroom. FML
Today, my dad told me to knock it off with my "stupid gangster walk", saying it made me look like an idiot. I didn't have the balls to admit I'd sharted my pants and was awkwardly waddling to the bathroom to clean myself up. FML
Today, after finishing the laundry, I took clothes out of the dryer and took a big whiff of their delicious clean scent. That was when I noticed that my mom was watching me, and I had just smelled my dad's still-stained underwear that was on top. FML
Today, it was my mom's birthday, I planned to wish her a happy birthday as she woke up. I opened the door to her room, only to see my dad dancing around in an American flag thong. Grimacing in pain, I closed the door right away. Not only am I forever disturbed, but now my dad is asking me how he looks naked. FML
Today, my dad invited our very cute neighbor inside to introduce him to me. I was wearing pajamas and hadn't showered in two days due to being extremely sick. FML
Today, my partner and I were cuddling on the couch, watching TV when she smiled and murmured, "You smell like my dad." FML
Today, my dad came home drunk and called me hot. FML
Today, my new husband and I were called up to have our first dance at our wedding. While I rested my head on his shoulder, he whispered the most romantic thing to me: "Your breath stinks." FML
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Top comments
CaptainCola 7
Just be like "it's your breath, stop talking and maybe it will stop smelling so bad around here..ooohhh burn!!" Eh I got nothing...
luismyl 6
Hey he is being honest
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Comments (47)
hero93 6
I swore that said "dog" instead of "dad" at first. I was like wow.. how high is OP that his dog is talking to him?
replik_fml 3
well do what the man says
hateevryone 15
that's bad. go take a shower.
Camrynn 0
Hahaha.. Nasty take a shower
Bently24 6
At least he told you.
pm_sky 0
Your comment : that's you dad, only family is that honest...listen to him!
The_Tool1 13
Fish?
l0v3p4in 7
Moma always said, "Make sure you wear clean panties." You never know what could happen. You may meet the love of your life today, so you certainly don't want to scare him off with your skunk musk.
ouchie1013 0
my dad calls me a stink bomb just when he passes by. it's a joke though
hogwartsbitches 6
Go take a damn shower