Miscellaneous: Today, my dad asked me to move a potted plant from one side of...

By ether10 - 04/06/2009 06:27 - United States

Today, my dad asked me to move a potted plant from one side of the yard to the other. It looked like a very heavy pot, so I heaved it up with all my might. Turns out it was one of those heavy-looking ones that are actually light plastic. I fell over backwards and dumped dirt into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 123

You deserved it 19 778

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Same thing different taste

PIVOT!

By Anonymous - 02/05/2011 17:43 - United States

Today, I helped my parents move out of their old house. While I was guiding my dad down the stairs with the couch, my mom asked me to pick up the tape on the step below me. I bent over and grunted. My dad thought I said "Go" and kept moving. He knocked me down two flights of steps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 729

You deserved it 4 255

By flowerfail - 16/06/2009 09:13 - United States

Today, I stepped outside to wait for a cute guy to arrive after arduously preparing for our first date. Just as he rounded the corner, I tripped over the last stair and landed headfirst into my mom's fresh pot of snapdragons. My mom uses compost and manure for her plants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 722

You deserved it 4 985

Move!

By patrickRafael - 29/12/2009 14:21 - Singapore

Today, my father was pruning the tree in our front yard. I was helping him collect the falling branches. At one point, a branch fell and I was under it. My father jumped to push me out of the way. Instead he pushed the branch into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 395

You deserved it 3 009

By Weldingtags - 28/10/2011 20:59 - United States

Today, my dad asked if I'd help him clean the gutters. I was given the responsibility of holding the ladder while he went on the roof. All I heard was laughter before a year's worth of rotting vegetation landed on top of my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 114

You deserved it 2 960

Falling down

By Ouch - 26/06/2021 11:01 - Serbia

Today, I learned how it feels like when you fall off a second floor balcony with mom's flower pot, landing on your back. My mom got pissed because of her beloved flowers, and gave me a lecture while I rolled on the ground in pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 838

You deserved it 123

Mommy's favorite flower

By Ouch - 10/10/2019 02:00 - Serbia

Today, I learned how it feels when you fall off a second floor balcony with mom's flower pot then landing on your back. My mom got pissed because of her beloved flowers, and gave me a lecture while I rolled on the ground in pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 698

You deserved it 280

Rip it up and start again

By Anonymous - 09/02/2022 02:00 - Germany - Norden

Today, after cleaning my mom’s bathroom, I wiped the molding strip along the wall so it was even. A quite precariously-hung potted plant thought that reason enough to fall right on top of me, spreading dirt over the entire room as well as my hair, my sweater, and the inside of my bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 849

You deserved it 127

By TheSublime - 21/10/2009 13:54 - United Kingdom

Today, I was helping a friend redecorate. She had put up some shelving, that we presumed was stable. It broke, and all the expensive vases and collectables fell to the floor. On instinct, I leapt forward to catch the closest thing. It was not the expensive vase. It was a cactus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 866

You deserved it 4 655

Slasher

By Anonymous - 09/09/2013 17:44 - United States - Sylvania

Today, my mom bumped into a table with a glass vase on it. Seeing that the vase was about to fall, I lunged to catch it. Before I got there, the vase fell and shattered, resulting in me diving into the broken shards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 943

You deserved it 5 942

By Ouchhh - 25/05/2010 06:54 - United States

Today, I leaned back and bumped into one of my mom's plants in the window. The good thing was that I caught it before it fell and shattered. The bad thing was that my mom likes to keep cactii in the window. I can still feel thorns I haven't managed to pluck out yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 907

You deserved it 4 554

urlifeisraped 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 16:09

That's how you do it balls out

Peroxide 3

Thursday 4 June 2009 16:14

I did this once except it actually was heavy and the exertion made the ass of my pants explode

Comments

urlifeisraped 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 16:09

That's how you do it balls out

DizzyDemon0 9

Thursday 4 June 2009 16:10

Hahahahaha. #1 is right! Balls out man!

und34d 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 16:10

your my hero

teamhat 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 16:11

taste nice?

gaby904 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 16:12

hahahaha this just made my day!

jer13 2

Wednesday 14 July 2010 9:12

To number 7..the story is hillarious not your profile picture by the way.

Lucidium 0

Thursday 30 December 2010 3:52

To number 139, shut up, wh***.

Xero3g 5

Thursday 4 June 2009 16:13

..........You are stupid.

jer13 2

Wednesday 14 July 2010 9:10

Have you seen your profile picture? I think it's hillarious! It's something I would do.

Vaati_fml 20

Saturday 19 April 2014 7:52

138 - No, he hasn't 'cuz he posted by accident.

Peroxide 3

Thursday 4 June 2009 16:14

I did this once except it actually was heavy and the exertion made the ass of my pants explode

Jade_Rothwell 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 16:15

So FYL and YDI because yeah, that sucks... but also.. why not just try and lift it first and *then* see if you need more strength.

KINGMARIO_fml 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 16:18

How did this get through, ur life isn't f****ed cuz u ate some dirt. Wow what a puss

martymcfly12 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 16:23

Wow your stupid

kevmeister 4

Friday 14 September 2012 6:48

You're

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The Top

Today, my wife waited until we’d been married for two weeks to tell me she has a mountain of credit card debt that she’s been hiding from me. This explains why she insisted the mortgage and car be in my name, her credit score is so low that it’s almost a double digit FML

I agree, your life sucks 504

You deserved it 140

Today, I had awesome sex with my ex. Again. I broke up with her a few weeks ago as she admittedly hadn't been attracted to me anymore in a long time. Now she says that after we broke up she doesn't feel any pressure anymore, and can enjoy sex with me again like she did before she moved in with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 385

You deserved it 199

The Top

Today, I went to the doctor's. I had food poisoning last week, which led to diarrhea. The diarrhea was so bad it caused a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid somehow became infected. One bad sandwich, and now I have an infected asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 794

You deserved it 112

Today, I filled out a political survey for a psychology experiment. A really cute girl was doing it, too. We hit it off and flirted through the surveys, and I asked her out when it was done. Then I found out it was really an attraction experiment and she was in on it. She was acting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 892

You deserved it 7 813

Today, I had to wave my arms like a maniac as I sat on the toilet at work, otherwise the faulty motion sensor/timer would turn the lights off after about ten seconds. I've had to do this for several days now. No one else has reported this problem, so management won't get it fixed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 155

You deserved it 4 360

Today, I put a tampon in. The string broke. I had to go to the hospital to get it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 964

You deserved it 7 260

Hang in there, buddy!

I agree, your life sucks 560

You deserved it 136

Today, I announced to my fiance that I was pregnant with twins. He immediately called off the engagement, furious at me because we "agreed to only have one child". Sorry my embryo decided to split in two. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 442

You deserved it 634