Haha your dad sounds funny.

Cats need to have fun too, op! It's not all about you, that's not right!

Laser kitty..purr purr purr

Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur...
Happy kitty, sleep kitty, purr purr purr.

So original..

72- Yes, it was.

That is funny right there

BIG BANG THEORY FOR LIFE!!

Hopefully she didn't impale you with razor sharp claws.

How else is it gonna get the mysterious fleeing dot?

I'm assuming since the cat was inside that they had him/her declawed. Let's hope, for OP's sake, that they did.

It wouldnt be much of a FML if the cat was declawed.

10- never own a pet. Seriously. I hope someone comes along and chops off the first bone in each of your fingers if you think declawing is a good thing. Most indoor cats are not declawed. Just those who have morons who don't know how to train a pet and probably shouldn't have one in the first place.

Unfortunately in America, it's considered perfectly normal and even encouraged to have cats declawed. People have given me shit before for not having done so for my 13 year old cat. Apparently furniture is more important than a living creature you chose to take into your home. Go fucking figure.

I have two in door cats that have their claws. They don't scratch the furniture because we have a scratching post. Just because their indoor doesn't mean they are declawed.

Declawing is not considered perfectly normal in America. Only if you are an animal abuser and refuse to learn how to train your cats. I have two and the only thing they claw is their scratching post, and sometimes each other.

Not where I live. I don't know anyone besides myself whose cats are not declawed. The owners consider it as abusive as having them neutered. Maybe I just know a bunch of terrible shits.

If the cat was declawed, that would be too adorible for an FML. Cat paws are soft!

But be warned, they still have those sharp fucking teeth.

That was great teamwork(: I'm guessing you aren't easily awakened if he has to go to those measures.

I'm assuming OP wakes up just fine and that perhaps the laser/cat combo was more for entertainment value than practicality.

That's also a possibility. Maybe a little bit of both.

Silly cats theyll never learn

Entertainment for us!!!

Lol reminds me of my cat, he loves laser pointers.

And every cat ever.

I would know, I'm a cat.

My cat is lazy, she doesn't like laser pointers. Instead she spends her days eating cucumber & cottage cheese. And occasionally snatching a peanut butter sammich. Yep, she's an odd one. But I love her to bits.

Haha, my other cat is lazy too, she runs after the laser pointer but after about 5 laps she stops and lays down. :p

WI have two. A psycho hyper one and a chill pear shaped calico. They're sisters, named Miss FancyPants and Miss Marbles.
Shh... Don't judge, I named them when I was a wee gaffer.

Haha it's okay, my cats have strange names too. The older one is Oink and the younger one is Quack. :)

Cub

It's either the cat or a cold bucket of water.

Creativity points with the laser pointer for sure

I'd rather have the bucket of water thrown on me than a cat pouncing on my face.
But that might just be me.

I felt slow cause it took me a minute to get the point.

Unfortunately the same could not be said for your cat.

Get him back by pointing the laser at his junk :)

in the early morning too

I'm sorry, but the words dad and junk should not be in the same sentence.

"Today, i had a wonderful time with my dad when we moved some old junk out of the basement and found some of my antique baseball cards."

Now that is a great sentence.. But your profile picture is shit.

Puns haha

Ouch! Hope you're ok!

OP wait until your dad is in the shower and sneak in and throw the cat in there with him, now that's a good payback.

I tried that once except instead of my pet cat I used my pet toaster.

The firemen were really nice. The police were not.

You sound like your psycho.

Shh 31 maybe if we don't talk or move he'll go away....

Ponies I'm not to sure.

It was a FML from awhile ago, (the cat, not the toaster :p).

If you wanna get him back wake HIM up, my personal favorites are with water, lasers, and wearing a mask while starting a chainsaw (always funny).

O_o

I like your thinking

Poor cat...