Today, my brother spent the whole day making a harpoon out of...

By Anonymous - 29/08/2019 14:00 - Canada

Today, my brother spent the whole day making a harpoon out of an old Tiki torch to bring on vacation with us to Sauble Beach, and he plans on using this contraption. On the beach. With all of us there to watch. He's 17 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 266

You deserved it 214

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Same thing different taste

DIY

By caisse à outs - 23/09/2015 01:06 - France - Saint Quentin

Today, my brother asked to borrow a hammer, a chisel, and a drill just in case. I asked him if he was finally getting round to starting work on his apartment. Nope, he was just going to crack open a coconut he'd bought at the supermarket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 515

You deserved it 2 101

Dude, gross!

By Mojo0608 - 02/11/2014 21:28 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my 16-year-old brother once again scored well at a local archery competition. He got home and, once again, unleashed his "spectacular aim" at the toilet - or rather the toilet seat and surrounding floor. He refuses to clean the bathroom we share every single time he does this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 289

You deserved it 2 540

By Anonymous - 05/07/2012 04:01 - Canada - Brampton

Today, my brother thought it would be funny to pretend my tampons were "dynamite" and run around the house throwing them at my friends and family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 322

You deserved it 2 587

By Samantha - 13/03/2012 17:59 - Canada

Today, my dad insisted on having a family movie night. He chose the movies Jaws and Mayday. I'm going on a diving expedition tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 997

You deserved it 2 924

By Anonymous - 16/03/2016 20:58 - United States - Durham

Today, I fell down a hill out of my hammock, which broke my phone screen and my sunglasses. My idiot brother launched me out of it, so he could "assert his dominance." He's 11. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 930

You deserved it 1 803

It's what he would've wanted

By vinvin2210 - 10/02/2023 04:00

Today, we went to disperse my father's ashes in his favorite lake. My brother was anxious to show off to his new wife, and took us to a fancy resort on the lake. He fell into the lake with my dad's ashes. Nobody laughed when he got out. Oh and as he's a stingy ass, I ended up paying for the trip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 805

You deserved it 132

By Anonymous - 12/07/2014 16:09 - United Kingdom - Crawley

Today, my brother decided to help me artificially age some of my artwork by singeing the edges slightly. Apparently "my brother set fire to my homework" isn't a valid excuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 873

You deserved it 6 451

Don't hate the player…

By Jpaylay - 12/08/2021 14:00 - United States - Lakeland

Today, my brother bamboozled me out of 20$. He's 12 years-old, and I'm 17. FML

I agree, your life sucks 311

You deserved it 797

By Fubar0906 - 19/05/2009 01:11 - United States

Today, I'm on vacation. I spent $4000 to surprise my boyfriend on a trip to Hawaii. We have been together over a year. Turns out, he hates the outdoors. He's mad at me for bringing him here and is upset at everything. He's in the room reading, I'm at the bar drinking $10 Mai Tai's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 559

You deserved it 17 583

By Anonymous - 19/09/2017 13:00

Today, my seemingly innocent younger brother showed our family a video of what he was doing last night when he skipped New Student Orientation. He's been in college all of 48 hours and he's already joined a fight club. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 234

You deserved it 306

Seeya55 31

Thursday 29 August 2019 14:58

Who gives a shit? Let him have fun and do whatever he wants. It's your's AND his vacation. I'd love it if I wasn't berated for doing something different and interesting in my free time!

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 29 August 2019 16:25

Just call him Ishmael and have a whale of a good time! Shut your blowhole and don't be a Moby Dick.

Comments

Seeya55 31

Thursday 29 August 2019 14:58

Who gives a shit? Let him have fun and do whatever he wants. It's your's AND his vacation. I'd love it if I wasn't berated for doing something different and interesting in my free time!

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 29 August 2019 16:25

Just call him Ishmael and have a whale of a good time! Shut your blowhole and don't be a Moby Dick.

Bevis Butthead 4

Thursday 29 August 2019 17:13

At least your parents don't need to worry about him getting laid... ever.

zoelog 10

Thursday 29 August 2019 22:58

and.....im not understanding the problem.

QueenSaru 28

Thursday 29 August 2019 23:24

I want to know what he thinks he's going to be able to harpoon at Sauble Beach of all places...

jbuckets_404 38

Thursday 29 August 2019 23:37

OP, that was YOUR group that day at the beach?! It was hilarious! Correct, your bro's a doofus. But still lovable. LOL!

Tiffani Carter 6

Friday 30 August 2019 2:56

Well there have been a lot of shark sightings at beaches here this summer. Maybe he’s just trying to protect his family.

E2dav 5

Saturday 31 August 2019 2:54

Is he actually wanting to try and harpoon a whale? or just acting it out? The former would make me think he needs help...but the latter means enrol him in drama classes already