Today, my boyfriend went down on me. I don't know why, but my mind wandered. He now thinks that he has the skills of a porn star, while I'm pretty sure that finally solving a mathematical problem I've been working on for a week caused me to orgasm. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me for the first time. He stopped just as I was about to orgasm, and asked if I could finish by myself. Apparently he'd come up with a new algorithm for the Rubik's Cube on my desk and wanted to try it out. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, I had my first orgasm. He thought something was wrong, so he stopped. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me an amazing orgasm after a long dry spell. I moaned his name as I climaxed, and he replied, "What?" FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was making a list of things to do tomorrow while faking an orgasm when I realize my boyfriend had finished about two minutes ago. He's pissed. FML
Today, my boyfriend was pleasuring me with his hands. After two years of being together, he was finally about to make me orgasm for the first time by himself. Just as I was reaching my peak, he orgasmed at the thought of finishing me off and stopped. FML
Today, I let my boyfriend finger me for the first time. Today, I also learned, after fifteen very, very long minutes of it, how to fake an orgasm. FML
Today, after what I thought was an amazing sex session with my boyfriend, he let out a big sigh and told me I need to watch more porn. FML
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. I started to moan right when I was about to climax. He got worried, stopped and asked, "Are you okay?!" FML
Today, my boyfriend finally got me to orgasm, for the first time in my life, after trying for months. He started laughing when I climaxed. I asked why. Apparently I look like an Down's Syndrome child when I climax. FML
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Top comments
oj101 33
I see that he satisfied the equation.
xSavaqee 12
how does a math problem make you ******...?
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Comments (114)
YooperTransplant 8
That's gonna be a widely-read paper.
XxxPineapplexxX 1
Finally figure out 4+4?
unixdude 9
Practice makes perfect
Sophie_Hart 9
What are you?
vuduguru 5
at least you came ha that's about the only plus I heard
Scynistr 20
Doesn't matter had sex?
BDA_fml 5
2 + 1 = The SHOCKER!!!
RedPillSucks 33
Rows and columns enveloped her on all sides. Tangents approached her surface. She grew tensor and tensor. Quite suddenly, three branches of a hyperbola touched her at a single point, she oscillated wildly and lost all sense of directrix
plagiarismo 16
... I wish I was smart enough to come up with a math-based sex joke.
sparksUSN 2
Are you lisbeth salander?