Today, my boyfriend told me how jealous he gets when I "hang out" with Dylan. Dylan is the 5-year-old boy whom I babysit every day. My boyfriend wants me to stop, because apparently Dylan cockblocks him. FML
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Wild Nights Out
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Today, my roommate's boyfriend told me he would be driving the several hours EVERY weekend to come see his girlfriend. As a couple, they are constantly all over each other, and can't seem to break out of the annoying baby talk voice. Plus, they like to kick me out of the room to do stuff. FML
Today, I was working at the daycare. As I left with my boyfriend, a kid came up to us and said that my boyfriend could do way better. FML
Today, even my 11-year-old noticed how much my boyfriend constantly reminisces about his ex-girlfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend's mum said she won't stop us from seeing each other, yet she'll only allow me to see him for 30 minutes a day, for 2 days a week, and gets mad if he sees me for any longer, because "mother knows best." FML
Today, I told both my boyfriend and my son that they needed to start spending more time together. They both asked why and what they did that I feel the need to punish them. They’re so similar, even I forget they’re not father and son, and yet for some reason they hate each other. FML
Today, I realized my friends were right about my obsession for my only son when I found myself genuinely jealous when I heard he recently got a new girlfriend. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend is extremely jealous of a stuffed toy that sits on my bed, all because it gets to 'sleep in the same bed as me and he doesn't.' Now, whenever he comes over, he throws it at the wall, death glares at it, then gets up and kicks it under my bed. FML
Today, I found out the people I babysit for have a nanny cam. Problem is, when I'm there, I act out scenarios in which I have the sweetest boyfriend. I also say his parts out loud in a man's voice. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend’s 6 year-old son. The first thing he said to me was, "You’re not going to leave us for another man like mommy did, right?" FML
Today, I realised my boyfriend is only nice to my son to make me happy. Turns out he hates children and will only do the minimum interaction with my 4-year-old son he can get away with, until he can fabricate an excuse to leave the room. FML
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Top comments
MrSassypants 34
"Dylan, you better stop messing with my girl or I'll beat the shit out of you!" "Oooohhh, you said a bad word!"
GraceyBlueEyes 13
What an idiot. He's clearly got some issues.
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Comments (123)
perdix 31
I take it this babysitting is a paying job? If you're doing this on a volunteer basis, your boyfriend has a legitimate beef with you!
abhi5 2
make Dylan say to ur boyfriend that " I am not cockblocking u asshole "!!!..he will learn something...
JMichael 26
Put a diaper on him and start treating him like a baby. That's how he's acting.
d4m4s74 12
Watch out, he might like that.
newburton13 26
If he's threatened by a five year old, he's not worth it.
mythicaltimes 15
In a sense, he is kind of being cockblocked, depending on how much time you spend watching Dylan.
kbuglgbco 4
Don't listen to him. He's obviously a idiot. Have him babysit with you. The kid is 5.. If he was 15 or something It make a little more sense. Good luck to you and this stupid guy OP.
mohamed_H 21
Looks like your boyfriend is the one who is 5 years old!
dude1987 5
Your boyfriend is a douchey ****.
tashapasha 11
Time for a new boyfriend
SingingFarmGirl 14
Yep more proof that the majority of the male population do not pass the mental age of five. Disclaimer: I am not saying that all men are idiots/immature/annoying/douches. Just that there is a certain large percentage that is.