By Iguana - 12/09/2012 02:35 - Canada - Oromocto

Spicy
Today, my boyfriend invited me over to "play with his lizard." After excitedly rushing across town, I realized this wasn't a euphemism, he actually bought an Iguana. FML
I agree, your life sucks 14 697
You deserved it 28 737
Intimacy
Previous FML Next FML

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

FMLshark 12

Sounds like the same boyfriend who wanted to test water displacement in the bathtub with his girlfriend.

491 4
Reply Report
rncannon 18

I would have been pretty excited anyway. Iguanas are cool.

214 5
Reply Report
Next

Comments

FMLshark 12

Sounds like the same boyfriend who wanted to test water displacement in the bathtub with his girlfriend.

491 4
Reply Report
TurtleSmile 14

This girl should perhaps take her boyfriend more literally.

77 2
Reply Report
AbstraktThoughts 13

Or she can stop assuming that everything a guy eludes to has to do with sex?

108 5
Reply Report
LMFAOwned 9

A lizard is a strange way to describe his dong anyway, but FYL OP.

44 2
Reply Report
doctorhook86 24

32: I don't know what you're talking about. My penis is green, scaly, cold, and grows up to 1.5 meters long, doesn't yours?

77 2
Reply Report
innavoiG 9

Sheldon Cooper returns! But seriously OP, who calls their dick a lizard?

20 1
Reply Report
redcyph 3

Nice shark pic

2 6
Reply Report
Tragichero92 12

Maybe OP confused it with "Hey want to play with my wizard?"

8 3
Reply Report
CaptainDoorknob 7

32 - Well people do sometimes say they need to "drain the lizard".

17 0
Reply Report
Iniezian 18

Sorry, I know what you're thinking, but it can't be the same person making stuff up. Water displacement girl lives in Maryland, USA, Iguana girl lives in New Brunswick, Canada.

4 20
Reply Report
njgohard 16

41-Actually, mine has this weird flare at the end, and every girl dropped dead after 5 days of agonizing pain.

12 3
Reply Report
VaultDweller106 7

You're a lizard Harry!

19 2
Reply Report
DCvRkey2012 7

I'm a what? :)

3 6
Reply Report
PinkieKeen 20

Also sounds like the guy who got aroused from a chipmunk running around in his pants.

4 2
Reply Report
CaptainDoorknob 7

111 - Wasn't it a gerbil?

3 1
Reply Report
CastielJ 6

Wow?!? You don't like Igunas?

148 12
Reply Report
Feared 9

Probably not inside of her.

12 33
Reply Report
XTheDesertSongX 17

17...What? What?

10 3
Reply Report
Farfalo 3

What the **** is an Iguna?

3 20
Reply Report
Randomoscity 0

He means iguanas.

4 7
Reply Report
thisgirlysfml 2

Well what were you expecting?;)

13 57
Reply Report
hotshot2626 9

Hopefully his actual penis has less bumps...

45 3
Reply Report
zandalee 19

Oh I don't know about that... A girl could have a lot of fun with a bumpy penis...

4 42
Reply Report
FMLshark 12

Genital warts don't sound all that fun, 23.

67 2
Reply Report
zandalee 19

I meant a ribbed condom. Lol

6 36
Reply Report
tne201992 12

Ripped condom? How is that even funny?

2 52
Reply Report
FlyingFucker 6

#23 you have a bumpy penis?

1 24
Reply Report
Szaszaspasz 26

"Ribbed."

20 0
Reply Report
gabbyed 2

"ribbed for her pleasure eeewwwww" lol

0 8
Reply Report
rncannon 18

I would have been pretty excited anyway. Iguanas are cool.

214 5
Reply Report
Teyros 24

If only all women were excited about that!

115 6
Reply Report
youjustmademelol 4

i think calling manly parts a lizard sounds a little gross and wouldnt at all be a turn on.. thats my veiw as a girl

0 11
Reply Report
annie_nk 22

That's a new one. How many euphemisms are out there?

66 3
Reply Report
KiddNYC1O 20

Lost count.

0 5
Reply Report
andriy_fml 0

Tell him you want him to come over and play with your cat... That'll teach him lol

120 4
Reply Report
JAB2010 1

What if she doesn't have a cat, though? (And borrowing one would just be silly)

2 48
Reply Report
domking1315 20

Everbody! I give you Buuuzzzz Killington!!

47 1
Reply Report
gc327072 30

*canned applause*

1 6
Reply Report
JAB2010 1

Wasn't being a 'buzzkill', just a realist. Big difference. :)

2 15
Reply Report
loloalltheway 23

This is not a fml....

1 5
Reply Report
Doortje 29

And yet it's on the FML website.

0 0
Reply Report
Mekeritrig 15

Iguanas are cool.

20 4
Reply Report
hayyyyleyyyybaby_fml 14

for some reason, I read your comment in Butthead's voice. It made it so much better. ;)

9 2
Reply Report
KogMaw 6

All lizards are amazing. If I had a boyfriend, and he had an Iguana, I'd probably spend more time with the Iguana...

41 10
Reply Report
your_ma 27

Maybe that's why you don't have a boyfriend.. Also why don't you just buy one yourself..?

24 4
Reply Report
Next