Today, my boyfriend invited me over to "play with his lizard." After excitedly rushing across town, I realized this wasn't a euphemism, he actually bought an Iguana. FML
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By
FMLshark
| 12
Sounds like the same boyfriend who wanted to test water displacement in the bathtub with his girlfriend.
By
rncannon
| 18
I would have been pretty excited anyway. Iguanas are cool.
COMMENTS
By
FMLshark
| 12
Sounds like the same boyfriend who wanted to test water displacement in the bathtub with his girlfriend.
Reply
TurtleSmile
| 14
This girl should perhaps take her boyfriend more literally.
Reply
AbstraktThoughts
| 13
Or she can stop assuming that everything a guy eludes to has to do with sex?
Reply
LMFAOwned
| 9
A lizard is a strange way to describe his dong anyway, but FYL OP.
Reply
doctorhook86
| 24
32: I don't know what you're talking about. My penis is green, scaly, cold, and grows up to 1.5 meters long, doesn't yours?
Reply
innavoiG
| 9
Sheldon Cooper returns! But seriously OP, who calls their dick a lizard?
Reply
redcyph
| 3
Nice shark pic
Reply
Tragichero92
| 12
Maybe OP confused it with "Hey want to play with my wizard?"
Reply
CaptainDoorknob
| 7
32 - Well people do sometimes say they need to "drain the lizard".
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Iniezian
| 18
Sorry, I know what you're thinking, but it can't be the same person making stuff up. Water displacement girl lives in Maryland, USA, Iguana girl lives in New Brunswick, Canada.
Reply
njgohard
| 16
41-Actually, mine has this weird flare at the end, and every girl dropped dead after 5 days of agonizing pain.
Reply
VaultDweller106
| 7
You're a lizard Harry!
Reply
DCvRkey2012
| 7
I'm a what? :)
Reply
PinkieKeen
| 20
Also sounds like the guy who got aroused from a chipmunk running around in his pants.
Reply
CaptainDoorknob
| 7
111 - Wasn't it a gerbil?
By
CastielJ
| 6
Wow?!? You don't like Igunas?
Reply
Feared
| 9
Probably not inside of her.
Reply
XTheDesertSongX
| 17
17...What? What?
Reply
Farfalo
| 3
What the fuck is an Iguna?
Reply
Randomoscity
| 0
He means iguanas.
By
thisgirlysfml
| 2
Well what were you expecting?;)
Reply
mmmPoptarts
| 6
A penis.
Reply
hotshot2626
| 9
Hopefully his actual penis has less bumps...
Reply
zandalee
| 19
Oh I don't know about that... A girl could have a lot of fun with a bumpy penis...
Reply
FMLshark
| 12
Genital warts don't sound all that fun, 23.
Reply
zandalee
| 19
I meant a ribbed condom. Lol
Reply
tne201992
| 12
Ripped condom? How is that even funny?
Reply
FlyingFucker
| 6
#23 you have a bumpy penis?
Reply
Szaszaspasz
| 26
"Ribbed."
Reply
gabbyed
| 2
"ribbed for her pleasure eeewwwww" lol
By
rncannon
| 18
I would have been pretty excited anyway. Iguanas are cool.
By
Teyros
| 24
If only all women were excited about that!
Reply
youjustmademelol
| 4
i think calling manly parts a lizard sounds a little gross and wouldnt at all be a turn on..
thats my veiw as a girl
thats my veiw as a girl
By
annie_nk
| 22
That's a new one. How many euphemisms are out there?
Reply
KiddNYC1O
| 20
Lost count.
By
andriy_fml
| 0
Tell him you want him to come over and play with your cat... That'll teach him lol
Reply
JAB2010
| 1
What if she doesn't have a cat, though? (And borrowing one would just be silly)
Reply
domking1315
| 20
Everbody! I give you Buuuzzzz Killington!!
Reply
gc327072
| 29
*canned applause*
Reply
JAB2010
| 1
Wasn't being a 'buzzkill', just a realist. Big difference. :)
By
loloalltheway
| 23
This is not a fml....
Reply
Doortje
| 29
And yet it's on the FML website.
By
Mekeritrig
| 15
Iguanas are cool.
Reply
hayyyyleyyyybaby_fml
| 14
for some reason, I read your comment in Butthead's voice. It made it so much better. ;)
By
KogMaw
| 6
All lizards are amazing. If I had a boyfriend, and he had an Iguana, I'd probably spend more time with the Iguana...
Reply
your_ma
| 27
Maybe that's why you don't have a boyfriend..
Also why don't you just buy one yourself..?
Also why don't you just buy one yourself..?