Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He wants us to stay friends, though, so he can continue to use my coffee maker. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me but wanted to make sure that we were still friends, so he could still use my Netflix. FML
Technique
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. How? He invited my mother to his house for coffee with his parents, and told her. She then had to come home and tell me I’d been dumped. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, severing all forms of communication but one: Words With Friends. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he wants to break up. But not until after our anniversary tomorrow, because he's already gotten dinner reservations for us. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by rapping in a voicemail. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me over breakfast. In the afternoon I got to smile at him prettily for hours because he was the photographer in a session neither of us could get out of. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, by text, while we were in the same room. FML
It's a beautiful life
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, as he'd realised that life is really short, and he's got to enjoy with his friends. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via text, right after I finished cleaning his apartment and dropping off a bunch of booze I bought for a big party we were having. It turns out that big party was his "newly single" party. FML
Adding insult to injury
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. While he was dumping me, he was holding hands with his new girlfriend. FML
Top comments
Ali_Br_fml 33
Change your locks. He can buy his own coffee maker.
perdix 31
Sounds legit. As a fellow caffeine addict, this makes perfect sense to me. Sure, there's the heartache of losing you, but why should he suffer the caffeine-withdrawal headache, too? You may not be together anymore, but you still can grind with him ;)
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Comments (87)
onorexveritas 24
tell him to get his own damn coffee maker
LONERANGER44 11
Least he didn't dump you for a chick. Wait that's worst.
evand123 3
Hahaha , cut him off !
alley410 11
I hope you said no..
RHCPmagik 0
Thats bull... Hes making excuses.. One doesnt just befriend an ex for material things. Especially something so minute as a coffee maker.. Pfft, that dude still wants you .. Ever heard the phrase " wanna come in for some coffee" usually means "bow chika wow wow" this sounds like that
katlynmr25 4
Everyone loves coffee
Wolfipoo 31
The guy doesn't deserve to use the almighty coffee grinder after doing that, especially now that he only wants to be friends to use you.