FML : Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He wants us to stay friends, though, so he can continue to use my coffee maker. FML

By Anonymous - / Monday 15 April 2013 16:02 / Norway - Trondheim

Love

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Top comments

By Ali_Br_fml | 33

#5450332 - Monday 15 April 2013 10:52

Change your locks. He can buy his own coffee maker.

By perdix | 29

#5450337 - Monday 15 April 2013 10:54

Sounds legit. As a fellow caffeine addict, this makes perfect sense to me. Sure, there's the heartache of losing you, but why should he suffer the caffeine-withdrawal headache, too? You may not be together anymore, but you still can grind with him ;)

Comments

By Ali_Br_fml | 33

#5450332 - Monday 15 April 2013 10:52

Change your locks. He can buy his own coffee maker.

Success4444 | 12

#5450703 - Tuesday 16 April 2013 02:30

I don't think that's what "friends with benefits" is all about.

LightningCactus | 12

#5450864 - Tuesday 16 April 2013 04:13

No, if it were friends with benefits, she would also have to supply the mugs.

YoungMisfit | 9

#5450970 - Tuesday 16 April 2013 07:33

It all depends if ursine of those makers with the disks you gotta share. Those things are awesome

fml121785 | 14

#5451137 - Tuesday 16 April 2013 10:16

Yea, YDI for dating a guy without his own coffee maker!

By perdix | 29

#5450337 - Monday 15 April 2013 10:54

Atheepic | 4

#5450446 - Monday 15 April 2013 11:49

This is exactly what I am thinking!

By harrypotter955 | 19

#5450338 - Monday 15 April 2013 10:54

Poison his coffee. It's that easy.

theunbeatableram | 3

#5452751 - Wednesday 17 April 2013 08:19

You and your psychopath mind.

By annie_nk | 22

#5450342 - Monday 15 April 2013 10:56

Sounds like he's preparing for divorce, if he were to get one. "You can keep the cat, I want the coffee maker!"

cupcakechick | 17

#5450432 - Monday 15 April 2013 11:37

they arent married....

Snowkeys | 11

#5450537 - Tuesday 16 April 2013 12:57

It does say boyfriend not husband.

annie_nk | 22

#5450545 - Tuesday 16 April 2013 01:02

I know it said boyfriend, not husband. When I said "if he gets one" I meant it in a future sense

By Fluffydemise | 18

#5450345 - Monday 15 April 2013 10:57

Throw some money at him and direct him to a cafe. Guy sounds unbelievably up himself.

lilhellian | 26

#5450420 - Monday 15 April 2013 11:32

He should use his own damn money..

9lashes | 15

#5450433 - Monday 15 April 2013 11:38

or throw some slaps and make him use his own money

not_a_robot | 15

#5451483 - Tuesday 16 April 2013 03:14

Or just forget about him. You have options now.

Mylifemaysuck | 6

#5466601 - Saturday 27 April 2013 12:07

He should have his own money, and if he's broke, then she should leave him to rot on the sidewalk.

By perdix | 29

#5450351 - Monday 15 April 2013 10:59

Switch to tea.

Fluffydemise | 18

#5450358 - Monday 15 April 2013 11:02

Sage advice, tea is infinitely better than coffee. Deterring your ex can almost be considered an aside to the wonderful joys of tea drinking.

perdix | 29

#5450718 - Tuesday 16 April 2013 02:39

#44, yes, but when you want to spite someone, you have to make some sacrifices.

Quizzical | 8

#5451934 - Tuesday 16 April 2013 08:26

She'd have to hide the coffee maker for a bit and say she gave it away. Otherwise he'll say since she quit coffee, she doesn't need the coffee maker.

By limitedition | 25

#5450354 - Monday 15 April 2013 11:01

What a douche. you must have an amazing coffee maker..

JessiKitty_lol | 7

#5450416 - Monday 15 April 2013 11:29

Exactly what I was thinking.

By Pstraka6 | 20

#5450355 - Monday 15 April 2013 11:01

Consider it a good thing then you're not with him then if all he sees you good for is making coffee. Don't worry you'll find a man who instead of stealing your coffee, wakes you up with a fresh cup in bed!