By Anonymous - 16/03/2012 20:23 - Ireland

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks 26 743
You deserved it 13 658

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justmethough 8

Is it just me or did the word "diddlestick" make everyone's day?

Fiddle with his diddlestick, and he didn't forgive?... Aw fiddlesticks :(


justmethough 8

Is it just me or did the word "diddlestick" make everyone's day?

Fiddle with his diddlestick, and he didn't forgive?... Aw fiddlesticks :(

alliewillie 22

Better a knee in his face than in his fiddlestick.

If you hate everything, why do u like this? Just asking...

Maybe I'm just being stupid, but how did you knee him in the face if his face was past your knee?

Llamacod 11

Yea, you're just being stupid

ToeJams 0

Since when is a girls ****** past her knee?

Llamacod 11

She jerked her leg and brought her knee into his face

The mere fact she's calling it a diddle stick tells me she's not ready.

Darkruler 5

That's all I'm going to call it now.

AlaskanEskimo34 0

My friend's last name is Diddlestick. He jerks off constantly so it's perfect.

Zimmington 21

59- Yea um, how would you know that??

Matty1188 6

Which is why I said she deserved it.

vol4life 6
theblackishkid1 6

Absolutely my new favorite word lol "diddlestick"

LoL reference? <3 I sometimes wonder how mature most of these posters are when they start naming genitalia, plumbing and their "business" ridiculous names like this lol

AlaskanEskimo34 0

65-we are roommates in college. Lucky me, I would get John Diddlestick-the guy who fiddles with his diddle daily- as my roommate.

What makes my day(umm night...) is how he going to explain his beat mug to his friends. OP's boyfriend's friend: Dude, what happened? OP's boyfriend: Uh, let's say the going got rough and leave it at that.

u should have SUCKED his diddlestick instead if just fondle it! bet he woulda forgave u then!

The words 'fondling his diddlestick' omg xD

Wow, that really sucks, if I were you, I'd get him a doctor.

Llamacod 11

To fiddle with his diddlestick? What good would that do?

I meant about his bloody nose and swollen eye. D:

Really? Have you never experienced minor injuries, if one can even call them that, before? Neither a simple bloody nose nor a swollen eye are reasons to visit a doctor. Give it some time, gentle care, and ice if you prefer, and the swelling will go down. As for the bloody nose, noses bleed quite easily; you shouldn't visit the doctor for it. By the time you get there, it'll likely be over. The only likely reason he should visit the doctor is if his nose is broken in any way, which would be pretty obvious from the start. This is one of the many reasons doctors don't take enough time for their patients - we have idiots who go to the doctor for these "issues." Many athletes and people who play life rough experience these things a lot. Don't overreact to it. Doesn't mean you can't treat it nicely, but don't waste your time and quite possibly your money with going to a doctor about a case like this. There are exceptions, but knees to the face happen often, and unless there are more significant complications, save yourself!

beccaishereyay 11

Yeah tell that to the people who have gotten hit in the face or head, didn't go to the doctor and developed a brain hemorrhage. Or those who had a concussion and went into a coma from "not overreacting".

137 - Well, you're definitely right there. Sorry. It is better safe than sorry, and I'm not remotely saying this for most head injuries. In fact, I was just referring to the swelling and bloody nose. I was a bit overreactive, actually. It just suddenly surprised me how often the "go to a doctor" comments come up in an FML.

gloopyone 4

Let's have some fun this beat is sick, I wanna take a ride on your diddlestick.

Did you not know that is what the Gameboy 'DS' was named after?

Lmao diddlestick... Don't worry too much about it, you guys will laugh about it later :)

Yea they'll probably laugh at his bloody nose and swollen eye too.

Favourited for using the term 'diddlestick.'

hawkey126 0

Comment thumbed up for spelling the British way.

Comment thumbed up for Pinkie Pie pic.

Pegasister_fml 5

I also thumbed up for Pinkie Pie! Go Pinkie Pie!! :D

DKjazz 20

I thumbed you up because everyone else was doing it and I just wanted to fit in.

Just tell him this was accidental payback for that time he accidentally cumed in your eye :-)

boundbytheanimus 9

That's the worst smiley. It's so passive aggressive.

grog_fml 3

I wouldn't forgive you if you called it a "diddlestick" either...

Way to go, op! Not only did you hurt him, you also only "fondled his diddlestick" rather than getting him medical help.

Bigboned38 0

Medical help for that? Have you ever been to the doctor? That's not worth a 500 dollar bill!

She could've at the very least made sure he was ok...

They're in Ireland, I don't believe there would be a bill.

Doc's likely to say "just put some ice on it". I'm sure they would have gone to the doctor's office if it looked serious (e.g. his nose being on his face upside down).

olpally 32

Lmao... But seriously, that's very unfortunate... You robbed yourself and him from sex... There's always tomorrow op. Just make sure you don't do that again when things are getting heated again :)