Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML
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By
justmethough
| 8
Is it just me or did the word "diddlestick" make everyone's day?
By
Feared
| 9
Fiddle with his diddlestick, and he didn't forgive?... Aw fiddlesticks :(
COMMENTS
By
justmethough
| 8
Is it just me or did the word "diddlestick" make everyone's day?
Reply
Nekogami
| 14
It's not just you. Rofl
Reply
Feared
| 9
Fiddle with his diddlestick, and he didn't forgive?... Aw fiddlesticks :(
Reply
alliewillie
| 22
Better a knee in his face than in his fiddlestick.
Reply
BostonBruinsFan
| 8
If you hate everything, why do u like this? Just asking...
Reply
kyarush
| 10
You like it rough? Giggity
Reply
s0m3guy2010
| 21
Maybe I'm just being stupid, but how did you knee him in the face if his face was past your knee?
Reply
Llamacod
| 11
Yea, you're just being stupid
Reply
ToeJams
| 0
Since when is a girls vagina past her knee?
Reply
Llamacod
| 11
She jerked her leg and brought her knee into his face
Reply
theaws0m3guy
| 4
The mere fact she's calling it a diddle stick tells me she's not ready.
Reply
Darkruler
| 5
That's all I'm going to call it now.
Reply
AlaskanEskimo34
| 0
My friend's last name is Diddlestick. He jerks off constantly so it's perfect.
Reply
KeyboardWarrior
| 10
Pretty open friendship you've got there.
Reply
Zimmington
| 21
59- Yea um, how would you know that??
Reply
HaykamNation
| 8
XD oh yes lul
Reply
Matty1188
| 6
Which is why I said she deserved it.
Reply
vol4life
| 6
Diddlestick Hahahahaha
Reply
theblackishkid1
| 6
Feared, I love you lol
Reply
hannahkrane
| 1
Absolutely my new favorite word lol "diddlestick"
Reply
J_Shorty_17
| 6
LoL reference? <3
I sometimes wonder how mature most of these posters are when they start naming genitalia, plumbing and their "business" ridiculous names like this lol
I sometimes wonder how mature most of these posters are when they start naming genitalia, plumbing and their "business" ridiculous names like this lol
Reply
1crabbygirl
| 10
diddlestick
Reply
DollFacePsycho
| 0
Agreed.
Reply
AlaskanEskimo34
| 0
65-we are roommates in college. Lucky me, I would get John Diddlestick-the guy who fiddles with his diddle daily- as my roommate.
Reply
HeartOfLead
| 24
What makes my day(umm night...) is how he going to explain his beat mug to his friends.
OP's boyfriend's friend: Dude, what happened?
OP's boyfriend: Uh, let's say the going got rough and leave it at that.
OP's boyfriend's friend: Dude, what happened?
OP's boyfriend: Uh, let's say the going got rough and leave it at that.
Reply
fugazeeb
| 0
u should have SUCKED his diddlestick instead if just fondle it! bet he woulda forgave u then!
Reply
dazzle_me_lovely
| 9
lolololololololol
Reply
livefree_drf
| 0
.. You need some new friends .
Reply
hhvamp3
| 0
Ahahahaha, it sure made mine.
Reply
masterofflight
| 8
it sounds just like..."littlestick"...
Reply
fangcutiepie
| 9
The words 'fondling his diddlestick' omg xD
By
DarkSeekerX94446
| 14
Wow, that really sucks, if I were you, I'd get him a doctor.
Reply
Llamacod
| 11
To fiddle with his diddlestick? What good would that do?
Reply
Llamacod
| 11
Thank you
Reply
DarkSeekerX94446
| 14
I meant about his bloody nose and swollen eye. D:
Reply
Marcelb
| 17
100 - No shit Sherlock
Reply
CRC_101
| 31
Really? Have you never experienced minor injuries, if one can even call them that, before? Neither a simple bloody nose nor a swollen eye are reasons to visit a doctor. Give it some time, gentle care, and ice if you prefer, and the swelling will go down. As for the bloody nose, noses bleed quite easily; you shouldn't visit the doctor for it. By the time you get there, it'll likely be over. The only likely reason he should visit the doctor is if his nose is broken in any way, which would be pretty obvious from the start.
This is one of the many reasons doctors don't take enough time for their patients - we have idiots who go to the doctor for these "issues." Many athletes and people who play life rough experience these things a lot. Don't overreact to it. Doesn't mean you can't treat it nicely, but don't waste your time and quite possibly your money with going to a doctor about a case like this. There are exceptions, but knees to the face happen often, and unless there are more significant complications, save yourself!
This is one of the many reasons doctors don't take enough time for their patients - we have idiots who go to the doctor for these "issues." Many athletes and people who play life rough experience these things a lot. Don't overreact to it. Doesn't mean you can't treat it nicely, but don't waste your time and quite possibly your money with going to a doctor about a case like this. There are exceptions, but knees to the face happen often, and unless there are more significant complications, save yourself!
Reply
beccaishereyay
| 11
Yeah tell that to the people who have gotten hit in the face or head, didn't go to the doctor and developed a brain hemorrhage. Or those who had a concussion and went into a coma from "not overreacting".
Reply
CRC_101
| 31
137 - Well, you're definitely right there. Sorry. It is better safe than sorry, and I'm not remotely saying this for most head injuries. In fact, I was just referring to the swelling and bloody nose. I was a bit overreactive, actually. It just suddenly surprised me how often the "go to a doctor" comments come up in an FML.
By
vhivfe
| 3
Diddlestick?
Reply
gloopyone
| 4
Let's have some fun this beat is sick, I wanna take a ride on your diddlestick.
Reply
ghostlilac
| 25
^ Don't be that guy. :P
Reply
ladyLALAA
| 28
31, beat me to it! 2 thumbs up :)
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HeartOfLead
| 24
It's from Ireland.
Reply
HeartOfLead
| 24
Did you not know that is what the Gameboy 'DS' was named after?
By
Crazberry
| 5
Lmao diddlestick... Don't worry too much about it, you guys will laugh about it later :)
Reply
MyNameIsViet
| 15
Yea they'll probably laugh at his bloody nose and swollen eye too.
By
Yousuck24
| 21
Favourited for using the term 'diddlestick.'
Reply
hawkey126
| 0
Comment thumbed up for spelling the British way.
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forgotmyabcs
| 1
Comment thumbed up for awesome avvy!
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RussianFox
| 13
Comment thumbed up for Pinkie Pie pic.
Reply
Pegasister_fml
| 5
I also thumbed up for Pinkie Pie! Go Pinkie Pie!! :D
Reply
DKjazz
| 20
I thumbed you up because everyone else was doing it and I just wanted to fit in.
Reply
Sonalis
| 9
C-C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER
By
greeneyedpothead
| 10
Just tell him this was accidental payback for that time he accidentally cumed in your eye :-)
Reply
boundbytheanimus
| 9
That's the worst smiley. It's so passive aggressive.
Reply
PInK_ExCiTeD
| 7
Dafaq? :)
By
natashax21
| 5
I'll never say fiddlesticks the same way again
Reply
high_tower87
| 9
It's diddlestick....
Reply
CaptFartGiggle
| 10
It's a league of legends thing.
By
grog_fml
| 3
I wouldn't forgive you if you called it a "diddlestick" either...
Reply
sarahbear430
| 0
Ya, calling it a
By
DreaminOfMusic
| 0
Way to go, op! Not only did you hurt him, you also only "fondled his diddlestick" rather than getting him medical help.
Reply
Bigboned38
| 0
Medical help for that? Have you ever been to the doctor? That's not worth a 500 dollar bill!
Reply
DreaminOfMusic
| 0
She could've at the very least made sure he was ok...
Reply
micahsmommy
| 13
They're in Ireland, I don't believe there would be a bill.
Reply
DreaminOfMusic
| 0
Agh the luck of the irish!
Reply
Isoldael
| 27
Doc's likely to say "just put some ice on it". I'm sure they would have gone to the doctor's office if it looked serious (e.g. his nose being on his face upside down).
By
olpally
| 32
Lmao... But seriously, that's very unfortunate... You robbed yourself and him from sex... There's always tomorrow op. Just make sure you don't do that again when things are getting heated again :)