Today, my boyfriend and I were choosing animals that reminded us of eachother. I said he reminded me of a tiger because he is really muscular. He told me I reminded him of a zebra. When I asked him why, he said it was because of my stretchmarks. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after feeling a little down about myself and looking for comfort from my boyfriend, he told me that my stretch marks make me look like a tiger. FML
Today, while changing my clothes, my 3 year-old daughter informed me that I looked like a zebra. Noticing my shocked face, she tried comforting me by telling me I was a pretty zebra because I was a purple zebra. She was talking about my stretch marks. FML
Today, my husband called me “my little zebra”. I gave birth a month ago, and I’ve kept a few stretch marks. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked my dad why he gave me the nickname "Bear," which he has called me since I was very little. My dad responded, "Because she has a hairy back." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were snuggling and telling eachother nice things. The nicest thing he could think of to say to me was "Well, I see you shaved your mustache." FML
Today, as I was walking out of a restaurant with my boyfriend, I saw some guys checking me out. One of them walked up to my boyfriend and said, "Dude, you and your girlfriend have matching moustaches!" FML
Today, I realized I have more in common with a cantaloupe than I do with my boyfriend. FML
Today, I showed my boyfriend the new tattoo of a butterfly that I'd gotten on my lower back. He said, "It looks like it's flying when your rolls jiggle." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he was growing a mustache, as he had whiskers. He looked at me and said "No, but apparently you are." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were in Victoria's Secret. I saw a picture of a model and said, "I wish I looked like that." He replied with, "Me too." FML
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Top comments
eeejit0102 0
#5, stretchmarks don't occur just because she's "let herself go" - don't be so insensitive. girls naturally get curvier (hips, breasts) during puberty and it can take a few years after puberty is done for them to TOTALLY disappear. they don't need to be reddish - often when they're old they're skin-colored and not as easy to detect. don't be such a prick.
OhHai 0
Ouch...........
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Comments (106)
MEGAJOSH 0
What's wrong with what he said? Stretch marks do look a lot like zebra stripes.
zap_fml 0
#41, you said she reminded you of an elephant and a donkey? Jesus. What a charmer. Keep hold of her, I don't know many girls that would laugh at that.
Puolukka 4
My God...just because she has stretchmarks doesn't mean she's fat...I weigh 118 lbs at a height of 5'7" and I've NEVER weighed more and even I have stretchmarks on my boobs, butt and thighs, for one thing because like #12 mentioned when you get curvier during puberty and your boobs grow too fast it just happens and the other reason is simply that I have really weak connective tissue, hereditary issue that I got from my Mom...and that's all stretchmarks are...ripped connective tissue that heals and the scars show up as stretchmarks
PTERONOPHOBIA 0
#41, I'm guessing you didn't say "you're an elephant because you're huge and wrinkly" or "you're a donkey because your teeth and ears are huge." Because just as in "you're a zebra because of your stretchmarks" that little bit extra makes it cross the line from a silly joke into rude. It's like saying that when you look at the person those imperfections are all you see. If you just throw the name of a weird animal out there, sure, it's just a joke, but if you're actually coming up with things to back your claims it's just... not that nice.
Pongo_fml 0
maybe he was trying to hint that he wants you to lose weight ... saw an opportunity and took it?
TEAZO 0
i like my stretch marks XD then again im whicked tinny so it doesnt offend me in any way. so what if he said you reminded him of a zebra. there cute animals XD
AprilLaz 0
I hope you broke up with him IMMEDIATELY!
zombiepeanut 0
He may have not meant it meanly, but he definitely should have thought about where he was going with that.
f_r_E_a_K 0
That's SO offensive - it's not funny nor acceptable! Stretch marks are an incredibly sensitive subject for the women whom have them, since many think they're shameful... DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM DUMP HIM
teenager101 0
that is so wierd because the other day me and my bf were doing that i said he was a tiger because he is super strong he said i was a zebra but he didnt have a reason for it