Today, my 12-year-old daughter informed me that she is eager to lose her virginity, "Because I don't want to be thrown into a volcano!" FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I overheard my 14-year-old daughter telling her friend that she's saving money to get her hymen surgically removed so her first time won't hurt. FML
Today, my five year-old daughter came up to me and told me she wanted to be a nun. When I asked why, she replied, "So I won't get my heart broken by a boy." FML
Today, my teenage daughter asked me how old I was when I lost my virginity. I sarcastically replied that I'm still a virgin. She looked at me blankly and said, "Jeez, no wonder you're so uptight. You need to get laid, mom." FML
Today, my daughter asked me what is the youngest age at which you should start having sex. Being a good mom, I said that she shouldn't have sex until after she's been married. My daughter then said, "Oh... shoot," and walked away. My daughter is twelve. FML
Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML
Today, my 14-year-old daughter told me she's pregnant and plans on dropping out of school to live a life on the road with her boyfriend. FML
Today, my 14 year old daughter told me she's pregnant. I work as a public speaker for promoting celibacy and safe sex. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she didn't want to get it on with me because she didn't want to "ruin my innocence." FML
Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML
Today, my 12 year-old daughter asked me where her scrotum is. FML
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Top comments
Crenny 16
Volcanoes aren't places you wanna be thrown into.
Classy_Sassy_15 15
You should have that talk with her
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Comments (123)
victoria63 12
whoa sounds like someone needs the "talk"
interesting33 37
Does she take things very literally?
patd77 12
Wtf
AlwaysWatching 27
Has she been playing Cards Against Humanity
timmeeeee 10
dont mind me im just passing by
player20270 32
Someone pointed out that you should clarify who taught her this, and I couldn't agree more. If she didn't saw that on the Internet, someone may be trying to get into her pants, convincing her to have sex with them. Watch out, there are sick people out there and she needs to know the danger.
interesting33 37
I might be making wildly innaccurate and crazy assumptions but is it possible that she has anxiety or a fear of something because that can be irrational. I was terrified of getting cholera when I was younger even though it is practically extinct in the UK. Fear doesn't always make you think rationally.
EthanSecondServe 10
Is this a reference to something?
mrrossh 3
Give her two options - come to her senses immediately, or else have her senses smacked back into her.
stargirl_95 24
I guess sitting down and talking to her would be too much?
minksy980 3
This is a Cards Against Humanity reference. Its like Apples to Apples but an adult version. One of the cards you can play is something to the idea of: Sacrifice a virgin into a volcano