By younggrammy - 20/08/2009 20:15 - United States

Spicy
Today, my 14 year old daughter told me she's pregnant. I work as a public speaker for promoting celibacy and safe sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks 61 094
You deserved it 45 195

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Im guessing your daughter never came to one of these speakings right?

I didn't know Sarah Palin visited FML! Awesome.

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ok well ydi because all this talk your daughter probably heard from you pushed her into getting under some guy. celibacy is for squares. and repopulation? duhh. and sex feels good. :]

repopulating? For WHAT? World's OVERpopulated. :|

#7 you are an idiot, if anything is for squares, its sex at 14

I like how you try and make this a fuck YOUR life, when it's your daughter you should be worried about. Way to be a selfish parent.

someone digs angry 90's chicks.

Wow, that's crazy. Kinda' reminds me of "The Secret Life Of The American Teenager". Good luck with your new grandchild. There is a similar post on this site as well. http://trynot2click-this.yolasite.com/

k so as i was saying. this is definatley your fault. what happened to this website it used to be funny and full of funny people but now its a bunch of what appear to be 30 year old parents. not cool fml not cool.

Hahahahaha. Win.

I do agree this should be a funny site, that's not funny at all.

its quite obvious what you have to do, the next time you see your daughter punch her in the stomach

The irony of that song is that nothing in it is actually ironic. Seriously? 14 years later and we're still too dumb to figure it out?

Secret life is so bad that it's funny some of the greatest quotes come out of that show "he died a horrible death because I had incredible sex"

#100 - Don't forget, "How do we even know I HAVE a birth canal?!"

SHE'S ON CRACK...or something. That show is so bad that it's good.

#49 learn how to spell definitely

to get rid of the baby use a FALCON PUNCH lol :D

FYL. You gotta slutty daughter.

and they taste good too. ;-)

FYL? FYL?? This can ONLY make you a better, knowledgeable, compassionate, and credible speaker. FYL only if you disdain success and effectiveness in what you do for a living. Now, grow a pair, strap yourself in, and give your daughter unconditional love.

He doesn't need to be pushed into what emotion he should give. I don't think you would know how you would react if your underaged daughter chooses idiotically to have unprotected sex after the father tells her she shouldn't.

Haha, if op's job really is a promoter of safe sex then he isn't doing his job right.

ahahahahahahaha win.

She wouldn't mention that if she didn't care about what this would do to her image though.

celibacy and abstinence are not the same thing. celibacy is never marrying; abstinence is never having sex.

Stop Posting With All Your Words Capitalized. Its Really Fucking Annoying And It Makes It Hard To Read. Fuck.

You Are Doing It Too. Since When Are You Someone To Tell Me How To Write My Comments? Fuck.

OmgItsAnaBeatriz: I do believe Zolotros was imitating your style of commenting in order to make the point that it is annoying... which it is. It's also illogical to put an extra effort to press the shift key every three or four characters.

Also - 14 year olds ARE fully developed enough to have sex. Most of them are, anyway. It's the psychological/emotional part that takes time.

It's shame that when a girl gets pregnant or is having sex at a young age she a whore,skank, or slut but when a boys run around having sex they get a good job and a pat on the back that makes no since. I'm fifteen ( no I have never been pregnant nor have I had sex) and that's unfortunate that her childhood is gone because she's not going to get it back but it's ignorant to assume that she is loose. Her mom should really also know that in this day and age absitinence/celibacy is almost impossible to teach!

#304: uh... no. Celibacy is never marrying and thusly never having sex. Abstinence is refraining from sex usually until marriage, not "never having sex"

hahahaha, Grace is so stupid, nd yea, im tired of tht show, all Amy does is complain and whine and call others sluts "uuuhhhh hello? earth to Amy, u R a slut! Ur the one with the baby!"

Why did #47 get voted down? There actually is a similar post on the Secrets page of that site.

Peter pan had sex with john lewis.

OP, is this sarah palin?

Regardless of what you do for a living, you're a bad parent for not being more involved in your daughter's life. Whether that's to be there to make sure she's not in a situation to get pregnant at 14 or make sure she knows what to do to avoid it (preferably NOT have sex as young as 14, but perhaps use condoms otherwise), you should have been more concerned about what your DAUGHTER was doing rather than the rest of the community.

As annoying as the 30-something parents are, I'm far more annoyed by the teenagers. When you are 16 years old, your life doesn't suck. Everyone thinks their life sucks at 16. Then you grow out of it and find out what an FML really is. New Rule Suggestion: If your post makes it clear that you still live with your parents, your life doesn't suck because you haven't really lived it yet. Get an apartment (and "My parents are charging me rent on their basement!" doesn't count,) go to school (and "I just got admitted to college!" doesn't count,) or get a job (and "I totally just had to help this mean customer at Best Buy!" doesn't count.) After you do one or more of those things, then you can post an FML.

Just because everyone thinks their life sucks at 16 doesnt mean a 16 year old can't have a legitimately sucky life. When I was 16 my mother kicked me out because I couldnt find a job and that made me 'lazy' I spent my entire summer babysitting her friends 3 kids (on her orders) for free and my two little sisters. Four days a week I would take all 5 kids out with me to apply for jobs (the other three days I took the kids swimming. It would have been unfair to make them come with me every day). I applied for every job I could think of. High positions and low ones, everywhere. However this was two years ago, when the economy first started to tank, and no where was hiring a 16 year old girl. I applied, for over 200 jobs that summer. I interviewed at about 20 places, but they always chose the 30 years old with work experince over the 16 year old looking for her first job. My mom kicked me out for being too lazy to get a job. I moved in with my father who had no running water adn no heat, and a leaky ceiling. I lived with him from August 30th to March 17th, taking showers at his friends house nad filling up gallon jugs of water for cooking and dishes, because he didn't have hte money toturn the water back on, and I still couldnt find a job. He started making me see a therapist (paid for by my health insurance) who told me that my mother wasperfectly justified in kicking me out. Trying to get a job is not the same ashaving one, and if I wasn't good enough to find a job I wasn't good enough to live in her house and set a bad example of not working for my younger sisters. That Seven months I was only able to talk to my sisters once. My mother would not answer my phone calls for the girls, and threw out any letters I sent them (this i found out after the fact, of course). I had been the second parent to my sisters. Their father had walked out on them (half sisters technically) and my mother and I had an understanding that I was to keep the house clean, the girls fed and well dressed and make sure the girls did thier homework during the school year, and she would go to work and keep the bills paid. I love those girls in a way that I can only compare to the way a mother loves her children, though not being a mother myself I can't be sure. Being away from tehm, nto able to contact them, was hell for me. When I moved back in, three days before my sisters birthday, I was yelled at two hours after getting home, because the house was still a mess. I went up to my room adn cried until my sister knocked on my door reminding me that I was lucky to be home with them. Now in my opinion, that sucks, and I would never wish that on anyone else.

Holy crap guys, it's a woman. Learn how to read.

It doesn't say she had unprotected sex. Maybe she used protection and it failed. That DOES happen sometimes...

Yeah, the OP is definitely a bad parent for having a job thus not being able to be with her daughter 24/7.

i completely agree.

YDI for the fact that you're promoting celibacy as an effective form of safe sex... "DON'T SHAG ANYONE GOD DOESN'T WANT YOU TOO blah blah friggin blah" Did you ever teach your kid about sex? about safe sex? or did you just tell her that sex is bad and she should not UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES let a boy put his wee wee inside you? Because if you did, then it's your own fault this happened... how many times do you see celibacy *actually* work? The weird statistic is that THE MORE KIDS KNOW ABOUT SEX, the less likely they are to do it so early. If they know nothing about it, they don't know what they're doing, they're going on animal instict, because that's essentially the only thing besides eat and sleep and drink that our ancestors did.

16 is waaaaaaay to young, yet alone 14

WTF?? and murder the baby? wat the fuck is wrong with you?

264--love you. Yes, it appears Sarah Palin has discovered the joys of FML. Oh wait.......we can't be making fun of her daughter. She's a minor (?) and now we have to go on the Letterman show to publicly apologize.

how in the hell is this a win? It's a sign that this poster was a parent who did not give their child any attention and only focused on their career.

I think the daughter was just looking for someone to give her attention. She clearly found a man and wanted to get her parents' attention. Easy fix. She got the attention desired.

Im guessing your daughter never came to one of these speakings right?

No, she probably grew up listening to her mother talk about celibacy all day, but never mention condoms. But this site has been ruined by 12-year-old brats. Shit, if I hear another story about some little cunt getting embarrassed because her older brother's "hot" friend saw her listening to Hannah Montana, I'm going to start flying planes into buildings.

This type of thing doesn't work anyway. You might as well tell kids to go fuck, because that's what trying to promote celibacy does. YDI for your job sucking. YDI again for you sucking at your job. YDI a third time for sucking at parenting.

I have nothing against you promoting your ideas, even though I strongly disagree with celibacy. So imo YDI for promoting celicaby AND then trying to talk about safe sex. One or the other, stupid... It's like saying DONT have sex. But if you do anyways... be safe; like you're saying it's still ok. Oh, and YDI for being a bad parent. Obviously you weren't very good in convincing your child to at least be SAFE if they are getting into that stuff.. If you can't keep your own kid out of it, maybe this isn't the right work for you. I don't think anybody will believe you now in any case.

Well, /someone's/ definitely fucked.

exactly wat i said

Oh the irony... that she teaches celibacy... but has a daughter. Note: celibacy and abstinence aren't the same thing.

I was thinking the same thing. Goodonya!

Bristol Palin!!!!

Well, /someone's/ definitely fucked.

someone should've spent more times with her kid

Or at least gotten a real job

Obviously deserve it for having a whore daughter, probably being a whore yourself, and sucking at parenting all at the same time. Bet that abortion looks even better now.

hahaha...that sucks...

holyfuck , she's too young