Today, it was my first day of work at a very high end company. While delivering coffee to my boss, I set it down on the edge of a magazine, where it spilled over, into his crotch. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to a coffee shop to meet a potential client. As soon as I sat down, I knocked my coffee over, and it splashed all over my lap. I tried to play it off by making a joke, but I hadn’t brought a spare pair of pants, and the client turned up just as I was mopping my crotch with paper towels. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to put a few extra spoonfuls of sugar in my co-worker's coffee. He thought it would be funny to throw the boiling hot coffee over my crotch. FML
Today, I had an interview for a job I’ve dreamt about. I sat down in the lobby and spilled coffee on my crotch. I tried to dry it in the toilet, which made it look like I’d pissed myself. When I entered his office, the HR guy glanced down and said, “Long morning?” I panicked and replied, “No, just excited to be here.” FML
Today, I was walking to a café with my soon-to-be boss. While crossing a busy street, I slipped in a puddle and accidentally grabbed his junk to catch myself. FML
Today, I went to get myself a latte to make myself feel better after having a bad day. As soon as I sat down to enjoy it, I spilled it all over myself, another customer, and the floor. FML
Today, I had an appointment with the CEO of a big company about a game I'm going to make for them. The first thing I did after sitting down was to throw my coffee all over his desk. FML
Today, my colleague was wearing a beautiful dress. I decided that I had to go over and compliment her. As I walked over, my coffee cup flew out of my hand and onto said dress. She had to go home and change, and my boss had to cover for her. FML
Today, I had a lunch meeting with important people from my company. While drinking from my wine glass someone cracked a joke, causing me to snort a fountain of wine all over my lap, splashing the people next to me. The horrified look on my boss's face sitting opposite me said everything. FML
Today, I went to Starbucks to get my free birthday coffee and due to a mistake I received two. Thinking it was my lucky day, I hurried off to work. As I was walking in, I tripped and spilt one coffee all over my new dress. Then I walked into a door and spilt the other. FML
Today, I went to go give my boss a high five for a job well done. I missed his hand and accidentally slapped his ass on the way down. FML
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Top comments
Ashle1gh 14
Did you offer to wipe it up? If you did it well enough, a promotion could've been in store for you.
flying_vegan 0
Maybe he asked for a lappuccino?
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Comments (71)
darkmis1 18
What position do you have that requires you to deliver coffee?
padlarf 14
YDI for proceeded
KurouTenshi 0
you can had fail, an I can has your bosses lap coffee ;o
perdix 31
YDI for bragging that the company was "high end," you pretentious asshole! There are no companies so low-class or humble where coffee in the crotch is a good career move.
flying_vegan 0
What about Coffee Crotch Ltd? Mixing your nuts with our beans since 1973.
perdix 31
I stand corrected. I forgot about them. They are the ones who are so low-class that they pay the Christmas bonuses in small sacks of dead skin that sloughed off the crotch burns all during the year. Fun Fact: Coffee Crotch, Ltd. is credited as being the originator of the term "happy sacks." Good catch, vegan!
XDNurse 0
I think I love you both... made my day.
sum1savemeh 0
lmao @ 24. you win
flying_vegan 0
Maybe he asked for a lappuccino?
Sionnach 10
'Today, the gorgeous new girl at the office introduced herself by spilling boiling hot coffee all over the last erection I'll ever have. FML'
QTp13 10
^ WIN!!! :)
Bugatti_Veyron 1
well you must not have a very good job at that high end company if you're dilivering coffe to your boss!
Anteezy 7
dilivering? xd delivering!
hihoney07 0
awwww I'm so sorry for you!
kemar7856 0
f his life
kel_pie 1
YOUR FIRED!!!!!!