Today, it was easter and I thought it might be fun to look for eggs with my little brother. My parents told me to take the ones in the higher places that my brother couldn't reach. All of his eggs were filled with candy or money. Each one of mine had a note saying 'maybe when you lose weight'. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I had an Easter Egg Hunt in my backyard for my kids. When they collected all the eggs, they opened them and to their dismay there was no candy inside. When I bought them, I thought they already came with candy. It’s been two hours and my kids won’t stop crying. FML
Today, for Easter, my brother and sister both got $200 gifts from my parents. I got a chocolate egg. I'm allergic to chocolate. FML
Today, my parents told me that I will grow up to be a criminal, living on the streets, on drugs. All this because I took the last chocolate egg. FML
Today, while at work at my grocery store I sold a TON of eggs to a bunch of kids. We joked around that they were "going to bake a giant cake." When I got home I found out someone had egged my house. FML
Today, I woke up and decided to make my mom a special Easter breakfast in bed. I pre-heated the oven to bake the sausage just the way she likes. Guess where my easter basket was. FML
Today, during an Easter egg hunt, I found divorce papers. FML
Today, it's Easter Sunday and from what I can hear, my neighbors invented a very special kind of Easter egg hunt. Maybe they hid them in the walls and furniture? Because getting at them sure seems to involve power tools. FML
Today, I discovered a drawer full of chocolates, cookies and baked goods in my house. When I asked my sister what the drawer was, she told me that my mom thought it would be a good idea to hide the fattening foods from me. My entire family had known about the food drawer, except me. FML
Today, it is both my birthday and Easter. My whole family came into town and my mom made a big dinner with all of my favorite foods. After church, I took a nap. When I woke up, all the food, including my cake, was gone. No one thought to wake me up. FML
Today, I decided to go on a diet to lose some weight before summer. This was followed by the arrival of a giant parcel full of candy from my mother. FML
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Top comments
Aera_fml 0
Wow. Next holiday (maybe Christmas) give your mom a note in a Tiffany's box that says, "Maybe when you pull that pine cone out of your ass" and give your dad the same note in an equally exciting box.
cyxx 0
Ouch, that's mean ... They could have just filled your eggs with money instead of candy, which would've been a subtle hint. That was harsh.
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Comments (140)
NGM_KID 0
LMAO!! I would have stolen your brother's candy anyways for being tricked like that...
serendipityKarma 0
I can't believe how mean some parents can be! Sucks for you.
Kamazar 0
Yeah, well, maybe you need it? Heart disease ain't fun. Just think about it ;)
padlarf 14
I am so sorry but i laughed so hard
sunshyne84_fml 0
LOL@9 Today IS Easter
Luckster 0
Ouch. Happy Easter indeed... for me, getting so much Candy around a holiday like this actually makes me aware of what I eat. I got a tone of candy in a care package from Mom a week ago and am too scared to go near all of it. I've LOST 5 pounds since it got here! XD
Meowff 0
Number nine, lol. I'm doing that to my mom, as all the time she makes fun of me. I can't forget, Eric! I'm going to use my Iphone's box. ;) And for my mom, my Tiffanys Box. Ha ha, perfect!!! (Eric is my mom's fiance.) Anyways, wow, that's cold. I would be so pissed at my mom is she did that to me.
Luckster 0
*ton damn me for not catching typos within the limit
kristenlee 3
Now you should pretend to be anorexic for a week and check yourself into a help clinic. Then when they confront you, scream april fools. :D
Spl4sh_D4m4g3 0
i agree with #1 and #7.