Today, it was confirmed that the "no pet rule" in my apartment complex is so strict that I'm not even allowed to have sea monkeys. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Today, I came home to an eviction notice after an apartment inspection. The reason? Having an unauthorized pet that could cause unnecessary damage to my suite. My pet is a goldfish. FML
Today, my landlord came to my apartment because of complaints from my neighbors, saying that animals are not allowed inside. Turns out my roommate makes cat-noises when she's bored. My landlord still doesn't believe me. FML
Summer vibes
Today, my roommates adopted two kittens without consulting me. We're not allowed to have pets in our apartment and I'm severely allergic to cats. Oh well, it's not like I needed to be able to breathe this summer. FML
Today, I came home to a lease violation and a $220 fine after a routine pest control visit. The violation: my single beta fish in a small bowl. FML
WTF?
Today, I was denied an animal adoption because I said "babies" instead of "kittens". Apparently that means I'm not serious about pet ownership. What?! FML
Today, I learned that my new apartment complex does not allow "altercations in community areas". This includes pulling my child out of the pool and reprimanding him for holding his cousin under water. I can't parent outside my apartment. FML
Fined
Today, my apartment complex added $250 to the $1,000 my roomate and I already owe because of an unauthorized pet and complaints from neighbors that our dog barks all night long. We don't have a dog, we don't even have a pet. FML
HOAs suck
Today, my condo board refused to lift the new policy, which requires pet owners to carry their dogs in common areas after someone's dog kept peeing in the hall. I can't physically carry my two dogs, so I'm now forced to wheel them through the building in a borrowed baby stroller. FML
Today, I called the landlord about the mouse I keep seeing in my kitchen. He wasted no time accusing me of keeping it as a pet, and went off on me about his "No Pets" policy. FML
WOOF WOOF
Today, my upstairs neighbors, in my supposedly pet-free apartment complex, got a puppy. It’s a Great Dane. FML
Top comments
Angitia 8
Wow... what the hell could a bunch of shrimp possibly do?
AugustBurnsToast 14
What about pet rocks?! :D
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Comments (130)
ThisIsMyReign 4
14 - Your "tankie"? Should I be worried?
jellitonoctopus 19
I love sea monkeys, I have the aqua watch :) haha take my little monkeys everywhere I go.
littlemsweirdo 12
I'm an idiot, I know and thumbs me down if you want but I gotta ask: what is a seamonkey?! Okay, I'm ready for bury :(
kickuwithmyfist 1
They're monkeys that live in the sea...lol jk idk :)
numbersystem 4
Theyre tiny shrimp like creatures
sweetval_fml 2
#27 who are you to tell #21 anything when you youself were on here earlier asking what were sea monkeys and you got -16 on it........
lepuppykicker 15
It only takes like 5 seconds on Google to find out. On here you're just going to be ignored.
MistressCaitlyn 7
5 replies and 4 of them aren't even attempting to answer the question? I will never understand people... Sea Monkeys are brine shrimp. They start off too small to see, and after a few days (I think 4-6, maybe a little longer) they start to look like little fish. I understand that if you can keep them alive, they grow to be about 3/4 inch long, and start reproducing at about 4 weeks. Starter "tanks" typically hold less than 1 1/2 cups of water, so OP not being able to keep them as pets seems ridiculous.
emvictoria 9
.
sunshinethehuman 9
They're these teeny tiny shrimp things you grow in the water.
littlemsweirdo 12
Very much appreciation to 65 and 88! I'd much rather ask the lovely FML family then google. (:
ILoveEggnog 7
Well, you can't really blame the guy, those things are off the hook animals.
doodlecloud 27
I guess rules are rules...though in terms of possible damage to the apartment or keeping up neighbours with pet noise, I really don't see the difference between seamonkeys and an empty tank of water...
Il_Maestro 6
Clearly you aren't teaching your seamonkeys the right kinds of tricks
hayyyyleyyyybaby_fml 14
If the tank was to break, it would probably cause some pretty extensive damage. The chances of that happening don't seem too incredibly likely, so it really is silly.
jerseyboy732 16
tell them it's either a sea monkey or a real monkey
KiddNYC1O 22
A baboon, with their big bright red ass.
SkoomaKi 28
I've never owned a pet, it's quite depressing... Does a daisy count?
br0ccoli 15
Never had a pet? You should get a Betta fish. They're pretty low maintenance. They have such cute personalities and don't need air bubble gizmos because they breathe from the air. Only one male per tank though or they'll kill each other. When I had one, it would light up my day because it would swim-dance happily towards me when I came in the room. Heh, males. They'll do their little tricks just to get fed. They're all the same.
Michael_92 20
I don't see why not. You have to water it, "feed" it light annndd it brings joy every time you see it..also has the added benefit of naturally smelling good; something most animals don't.
alycion 39
Oh ferret aroma is the best. ;) Yea, depending on critter, smell can be a downfall. Still worth it though, IMO. My favorite low maintenance pet is a leopard gecko. The crickets were a pain but cleaning the fish tank for my aquatic pets was too.
br0ccoli 15
No sea monkeys?! What's next? No sea horses or sea cowboys either??
Michael_92 20
Hope they still allow sea cucumbers.
mdtdnb 7
So much for freedom...my apartment complex won't even let me hang an American flag!
TheFamilyElf 17
Dude... Sea monkeys get crazy. Of course you're not allowed to have a bowl of those mofos in your apartment! They'd obviously wreak all kinds of havoc.