By Anonymous - 26/11/2012 05:45 - United States

Spicy
Today, it's our third anniversary. After a candlelit dinner and a midnight boat ride, my wife turned down sex, because "it's too cliché." FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 309
You deserved it 3 686

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What a bitch

Well next time you should tell her after she spends hours making dinner "eating dinner is too clichè"

Comments

What a bitch

Absofuckenlutely

Wiringify 22

1 - First comment of that kind I saw thumbed up.

^ and I hate how bitches are so commonplace nowadays.

She used her first right of refusal. Go to you second option.

So... Your partner is your personal prostitute? Give some money and receive some sex. Interesting view, but i'd like to point out that some people see sex as an act of love, which means that you can't buy sex from your lover and that (s)he is entitled to say 'no', even during special occasions. But still, FYL, OP. I've been in similar situations and it sucks.

I agree with 74 & 66. She didn't have to say it that way she could have just told him she rather enjoy the moment & she is not feeling up for sex. Maybe could have cuddled or did something less than intercourse. Or treated him to something sweet. I just don't think making such a comment after her boyfriend putting so much effort was called for. I would have at least done something in return to be appreciative. I know I would hurt my boyfriend's ego if I acted that way. So OP, sorry that happened maybe you shouldn't put so much effort for a few days & see how she feels about it & learns to appreciate more. I'm sure she'd miss it if she cares about you just like you do about her.

"It is an act of love, but if he is willing to go through such a fuss in making her happy, shouldn't she return the favor?" Well, it would be nice, but she's not obliged to do it. You can't force your partner to make love with you because it's your anniversary/wedding night/birthday/some other fancy occasion. If you want to have sex on your demand, you'll better buy a blow-up doll, her emotional and physical desire for sex is less complicated than that of a real person.

johnny_derp 3

oh yeah, how dare she not be in the mood for sex! everyone knows that women are obligated to have sex with their husbands any time they do something nice for them. really? how disgusting.

Women and minorities have everything done for them nowadays and every excuse given for them. Oh, so you don't want to cool dinner for your girl? You stereotypical, sexist pig. Oh, so you think women are bad drivers? Sexist douchebag. My point is, everyone wins but the white male. Vote me down, I don't really care. You people sicken me with your stupid wishy-washy morals and beliefs. What's right is right, and what's wrong is wrong. Have a backbone for crying out loud.

I think people are missing the point. OP isn't upset that his wife turned down sex. That's well within her rights. But to say it's because it would be cliché is an invalid reason after a candlelit dinner and all the other cheesy stuff she was happy to do earlier.

Three years of marriage, and that still surprises you?

decidedlyvague 11

You buy sex, and you buy love. In this day and age, a large portion of women won't sleep with men unless they buy them food or drinks, and in a relationship, it's generally expected that the male pay for the meal, and if you want commitment you have to buy a ring to purchase her love. Of course, it's not always the case, but I'm sure that he could've payed for a prostitute for the night for the amount of money he spent on the trip, trying to be compassionate and romantic, hoping to have a loving moment with his wife only for her to turn him down.

You don't pay the prostitute for sex, just to leave after...

SrDerick 5

Well, my girlfriend is allowed to turn down sex anytime she wants. all she has to do is say "sorry baby, but I'm not in the mood tonight." and I am perfectly fine with that. However, if she turns down sex through passive-agressive methods, then i reserve the right to post on fml about it.

chell1894 13

Come on guys, haven't your parents ever told you that you don't give to get back? You give out of love. Not to just receive something back. So either way he was a little self conceited for assuming he'd get sex for giving her something. I get or do things for my fiancé all of the time. Whether its a special occasion or just a random day. I do these things to show him how much I appreciate him. Not so I can get something out of it.

Next time don't do shit for your anniversary... To do something special just bcz it's your anniversary sounds "too cliché"... If she has a problem with that, she's a hypocritical bitch and divorce her

I agree with everything you've said for the most part. You said, "you give out of love" - a 3rd Anniversary is a great time to do just that. Wouldn't you agree? I think a lot of posters are thinking he was "expecting" sex in "exchange for taking her out" whereas it's more likely OP was more upset over the excuse that was made... which was absolutely ridiculous. If she truly cared about him and was considerate of his feelings she would be honest about declining and not give some bullshit excuse like that. There is such a thing as mutual respect in marriage. (not speaking from experience LOL)

You poor bastard

Woww. So women are suppose to turn it on like a light bulb since men did something nice? I don't think so. You should do something nice because you want to not just for sex!

Quest_ 13

And only one man in a boat was evident that night.

I saw what you did there. Too bad nobody else did.

I saw what you did there. Too bad nobody else liked it.

Well next time you should tell her after she spends hours making dinner "eating dinner is too clichè"

Boats and hoes.

Yeah because doing THAT will make the situation better. How about just telling the woman how you feel? Ask her WHY the rest the rest of the evening wasn't cliché. Or maybe why she finds sex cliché at all....

40- Dammit! Bad kitty! BAD! We're not hippies over here!

Wow, what a lovely display of male chauvinism. Whereas I agree that she shouldn’t have used the excuse of it “being cliché” after spending a pretty “cliché” evening, I still believe that a woman is entitled to say no to sex whenever she doesn’t feel like it. Same for a man. And maybe we only heard one side of the story, maybe the husband made heavy hints that after buying dinner and a boat ride, he was clearly hoping for some payback. Maybe, just maybe, she wanted to teach him a lesson about doing nice things for your partner without expecting something in return and this has nothing to do with her being a bitch or cheating on him.

cradle6 13

46, It seems like you're the chauvinist. They're married. Sex isn't this alien concept to them. Payback? Are you serious? Is the male the only one that benefits from sex? And OP was not upset about being turned on their anniversary, he was upset about the insane excuse she used.

Veratas 9

46 nice rant on chauvinism, but in all if your guile wisdom you missed the key factor that it was their anniversary. He's supposed to take her out for a nice dinner and romantic evening. If she had appreciated the gesture (sorry for putting this bluntly) she would had put out.

Instead of the dinner thing, when she asks for jewlery say no it's to cliche.

Married or not, sex is not to be expected on demand. I am engaged and having a healthy sex life is important for my fiance and me. However, we don't expect to have to do it on b-days or anniversaries. My point was that sometimes looking too keen does not give the results expected. My fiance would find really off-putting and annoying if I was pushing him for sex when he doesn't feel like it. I am just being the devil's advocate there. It is possible that OP's wife was just being selfish but it is also possible that OP makes these types of efforts only if he is gaining something in return. As I said, using the "cliche" excuse was lame but we don't know what's the background here. It's interesting to see however how many guys jumped to the conclusion: "wow what a bitch, after everything he's done for her, couldn't she just bend and be grateful?"

Well if for you "put out" with sex is what is expected in exchange of a nice evening, I do feel sorry for your girlfriend (if you have one). Sex is something that both people should want, not something you give as a thank you or to be nice.

What if I told you that instead of relying on using the "it's too cliche" trick, the wife would've been better off saying no?

johnny_derp 3

that's a great idea. act like an immature baby any time you don't get sex! that makes men look really good.

johnny_derp 3

that's a great idea. act like an immature baby any time you don't get sex! that makes men look really good.

46- no one said anything about her cheating...

blueonehascake 1

It is also interesting to see how many women jumped to the conclusion that he was expecting sex in return for a nice evening. Maybe (just maybe) the wife was being a bitch to her husband, regardless of how romantic the evening was, in denying something special that they could share simply because she didn't feel it was different or surprising.

I'm going to ignore the sheer nonsense that comprises most of this post and just say the following: You're right that a woman has the right to say no to her partner if she doesn't feel like it or not in the mood; say NO, not make a bullshit excuse that it's too cliché when candlelit dinners and boat rides are about as original as a blowjob.

Oh yea, because boat rides and candlelit dinners aren't cliche...

Hipster wife.

I think that was the irony of the FML..

Maybe you should rape her and ask if thats cliche

A little too far there bro.

I'd think that all of that would have made her pretty randy with all of its mood-setting qualities.

Did you lock yourself in the bathroom afterwards?

So he can masterbate. Duhh!

Why would he do that?

tell her "only sex in the house is considered mainstream now. the rest is ok"

SApprentice 34

It's one thing to not want to have sex, but that's just such a bullshit excuse. She could have at least talked about it with you, instead of lying like that. If she honestly was basing her decision off of how cliché it would be, then I truly feel sorry for you for marrying such an idiot.

I agree. You would think that, after being married for 3 years, she would be able to be honest with him. That's just fucked up. Dumb bitch.

You should've thrown her out the boat and told her that boat rides are too cliche

majorjeneral 0

Is a swim to shore mainstream?

Llama_Face89 33

17- not if they were on a tributary.

That too and if she wanted a ride back, make her row. God damn.

SystemofaBlink41 27

12- jail cells are cliche too...