Today, I woke up to what sounded like twigs snapping. Turns out it was the skull of a live mouse being crushed in my cat's jaws. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up to my cat slowly dragging her paw across my face. I opened my eyes to see a bloody mouse dangling an inch from my face. It was still twitching. FML
Today, my cat head-butted me awake as usual. I reached to pet him, but it wasn't his face I touched. It was the still-twitching corpse of the disemboweled rat he held in his jaws. FML
Today, my cat attempted to make up for my insomnia with a dead mouse. I have no idea where he got it. FML
Today, I woke up to a mouse sitting on my pillow and chewing on my hair. FML
Today, my cat brought home a bloody, barely-living mouse. The thing managed to escape and dragged itself into a crack in the wall, where it must have died. The only way to get it out before it starts to stink up the place is by demolishing the wall. FML
Today, I awoke at two in the morning to my cat putting his most recent kill on my chest. When I jumped up screaming, the dead mouse went flying and now my husband and I can't find it. Better yet, now both my husband and my cat are giving me the silent treatment. FML
Today, I found out that the mysterious smell from under my bed was my cats collection of dead mice. FML
Today, my cat was looking a little peaky. After craning my neck to check for lumps under his chin, he felt this was the perfect time to throw up a half-digested mouse onto my face. FML
Today, I made my way to bed around 4am after spending all night hanging out with my family. When I got to my bed, I started to clear a spot to lay down. Almost immediately, my hand touched something furry and cold and, fearing the worst, I turned the light on. Turns out my cat left me a half eaten rodent. FML
Today, I set up a mouse trap to kill the rodent plaguing my kitchen. While lying in bed, I heard an unmistakable snap, and ran to see what I'd caught. The mouse trap was missing. I now have a large, angry, and possibly dying animal running around my house. FML
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Top comments
LaughinStock 16
Huh seems like Tom finally caught Jerry :)
RedPillSucks 33
She brings you presents and all you do is complain.
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Comments (112)
neuroticallyyour_fml 17
FML's like this make me glad both of my cats are terrified of the outdoors and other animals. Go figure.
ScubaSteve802 3
I want a cat now.
10madirocks 6
Awww poor mousy :(
drlove78843 6
you've a awesome cat.
winner_by_error_fml 0
Your cat did you a favor. Quit your bitchin.
theater_disney 12
Did you really have to post that??
Random951 12
You rejected the present that your cat tried to give to you, Your cat must absolutely love you.
Superfreak420 0
You have mice in your house too?? Nasty
wellthatsukx 0
Well, one less mouse to worry about.
crazybunnyattack 11
"Today, my owner got mad at me for waking him up while I saved him from an intruder. FML" Come on, man...