By MilleeMacabre - 02/04/2013 18:42 - United States

Today, I woke up to my husband taking a piss on our bedroom floor. I screamed that he wasn't in the bathroom, to which he responded, "Shut up! I'm taking a piss, let me finish!" He has no recollection of the event. Now I have to clean up his piss and rewash my clothes. FML
I agree, your life sucks 37 352
You deserved it 4 131

MilleeMacabre tells us more.

Yes. He was drunk. That's my husband for ya.

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Why do you have to clean it up if he did it?


Was he drunk when he did it

AlexM42 5

eh, people do and say all sorts off weird stuff when they're partly asleep. He could just have easily been completely sober.

CharresBarkrey 15

Sounds like Ambien. I've heard of multiple people doing this exact thing on Ambien.

My alcoholic step father used to piss everywhere but the toilet. Those were the days...

cherry72 13

@33 Ambien was my 1st thought too. I've done some strange things on Ambien myself and not remembered anything. My husband hates me taking it. Only when absolutely needed if course.

I did this after a party one night. My roommate's gf was over too and it got all over her clothes. It was pretty epic. Didn't remember a thing the next morning and swore they were lying to me when they told me I pissed on the floor

73. That's ok though. You are a dog, a cute one at that. You don't hog the remote, or fart too much in bed... You are forgiven. ;)

A friend of mine once peed on my ironing board and clothes. He also woke up with no memory of it, but he was extremely drunk...

Yes. He was drunk. That's my husband for ya.

Why wouldn't you make him clean it up himself?! I certainly would have!

Hes drunk. No way he can clean it up

qwertyLP 9

Because she is the wife

Sounds like a sweet guy

I pee what you did there.

AFloppyWetWhale 6

Better to be pissed off than pissed on

2, 7, 23 urine luck...piss puns are in!

7, that was piss poor

Some of these are very punderful and others just piss me off.

perfect pun for the situation

Mikeskinner 7

It's ok, he's just marking his territory.

ViviMage 38

Ya know, the recent FML with the puppy and the young boy, MIHO, is a weak or small bladder. Not a territory issue.

I did. Maybe that bartender will clean it as she does it at her job.

Why do you have to clean it up if he did it?

RedPillSucks 31

exactly. SMH

Sarahs marble head?

This may seem sexist, but because she's the woman; it's what we do best. shocking, I know.

#34 I actually think she meant Sometimes Maps Happen. It is the new YOLO

Wondering the same thing. Make his ass clean it up. And I would make him wash your clothes. If he refuses then go piss on his clothes and get even.

twaumat 28

I think she is trying to be a caring good wife

GoodLookingGeese 10

Responsibility is the word. Being a good wife by doing what he f*cked isn't getting their marriage in a good direction.

perdix 29

He was just trying to create a romantic Ambien-ce.

zero4life123 7

If I were you I would get his fat ass up and make him clean it up!

Where do you get in the fml that he is fat?

Or have an ass?

TheDrifter 23

I don't think this is what most women have in mind when they complain that their man misses the bowl.

At least he didn't leave the toilet seat up...

flockz 19

at least he wasn't taking a shit.

Rewash? Burn them!

That would be an extreme overreaction. Urine is comprised primarily of water and is typically sterile. Washing them should suffice.

Urine isn't sterile. It's only sterile before it comes out. Common misconception.

You should have rubbed his nose in it. (never do this to dogs!)

Aww man! Me and my dog were preparing for are first pee to nose action. Thanks for the heads up!