Animals and Health: Today, I woke up and saw a piece of black fuzz on my shirt. I...

By yesikilledit - 20/11/2018 13:30

Today, I woke up and saw a piece of black fuzz on my shirt. I tried to pick it off but it crawled into my hand and stabbed my skin with its sharp legs. I screamed like a little girl because I had a centipede on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 361

You deserved it 339

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Same thing different taste

By rb - 01/05/2011 06:02 - United States

Today, I washed my hands and reached for the towel but felt something sticky. It was a house centipede. It exploded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 778

You deserved it 3 585

Bath time [GONE WRONG][CREEPYPASTA]

By noname - 27/12/2008 04:07 - France

Today, I was quietly having a bath when I felt something fall onto my shoulder blade. I glanced over my shoulder and saw what I thought were huge black spider legs. I screamed, completely hysterical, and I threw myself violently against a wall. It was my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 315

You deserved it 23 914

By yuckspider - 20/04/2009 00:17 - United States

Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 333

You deserved it 7 654

By somuchforthat - 19/02/2010 07:38 - Australia

Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 710

You deserved it 2 520

By OuchImAMoron - 29/11/2013 02:05 - United States - Old Bridge

Today, I was cleaning a pocketknife when I noticed a spider on my leg. My first reaction was to stab it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 459

You deserved it 46 728

By Shitsuo01 - 30/12/2016 01:56 - United States - Douglasville

Today, I noticed a small bite on my arm. I couldn't figure out what it came from until I saw a small insect crawling out of my bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 393

You deserved it 387

YAAAAAAAAAAAASS

By shat - 12/12/2015 07:14 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I woke up to the feeling of something crawling up my leg. I threw back the bed sheets and saw it was a cockroach. My dad said my ensuing scream was so girlish that he wondered what the hell my sister was doing in my bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 991

You deserved it 2 505

By Sally256 - 03/05/2009 15:53 - United States

Today, I was with my kids. We saw a tiny little bug and they started freaking out. Trying to show them that bugs are not scary, I picked it up. It bit me and now I have to go to the doctor because my hand is the size of a balloon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 657

You deserved it 27 022

Been here long?

By Anonymous - 14/10/2022 14:00

Today, while I was working from home on my laptop and had my feet up on the coffee table, I felt something on my foot. I looked down to see a spider the size of a quarter on top of my bare foot. It started doing something so I froze, hoping it wouldn't bite me. Instead, it anchored the start of its web to my skin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 931

You deserved it 164

The passenger

By BurnItOff - 19/04/2024 20:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I thought I had a stick stuck in my hair. A very pokey stick. That aggressively bit my face when I tried to get it out of my hair. It was a big ass spider. My face feels like it's been punched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 476

You deserved it 91

Ksweety_fml 27

Tuesday 20 November 2018 13:44

I would flipped out. I hate those things.

ajh1800 25

Tuesday 20 November 2018 14:08

How do you confuse a centipede for black fuzz?!?!

Comments

BurnInDemonFire 34

Wednesday 31 October 2018 18:19

I hope you ate it afterwards. It's wasteful if you don't.

Ksweety_fml 27

Tuesday 20 November 2018 13:44

I would flipped out. I hate those things.

ajh1800 25

Tuesday 20 November 2018 14:08

How do you confuse a centipede for black fuzz?!?!

onceuponatime456 16

Tuesday 20 November 2018 15:39

Centipedes do not stab people because they do NOT have sharp legs!

A_Person 5

Tuesday 20 November 2018 18:25

It crawled into your hand??? Did you go to get it removed?

donb23 23

Wednesday 21 November 2018 4:43

Since you did not relay your age, its not that strange if you are 11.

SkullHQ 27

Wednesday 21 November 2018 7:30

I would've done the same.

ike25 7

Wednesday 21 November 2018 9:08

I live in hawaii and nothing is scarier than a centipede.

zuckerburg 21

Wednesday 21 November 2018 12:21

You need to get your eyes tested if you can't tell "black fuzz" from a centipede...

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Public freakouts Cops Kids Fight Love Money Work Music Students Religion Embarrassing Miscellaneous Relatable Mental health Coworkers Awkward My ex Gross LGBTQIA+ Heartbreak Politics School Education Sleep Annoying YouTube Shopping Parents Transportation Ironic

The Top

Today, I'm quite ill. My new step-mother believes that the genetic wheat allergy I got from my mother would have gone away since she's now married to my father instead. Looks like dad picked a winner. FML

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Today, I’m so hungry. My parents only get food for my sister and I’ve been surviving on cheese sticks for the past week. I only have one left. I don’t get paid until next week. I’m so scared I’m gonna faint at the wheel instead of at home, where I’m usually able to sit down and get some water before I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 604

You deserved it 131

The Top

Today, while at the gym, my boyfriend wouldn't stop texting me. I was confident enough to text while on the treadmill. Bad idea: I hit myself on the bar and tripped in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 386

You deserved it 39 525

Today, I got extremely winded from adjusting my blanket. What a workout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 476

You deserved it 363

Today, my boyfriend took me out to a really romantic dinner. Later, I lost my virginity. The chicken was better than he was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 752

You deserved it 9 860

Today, while enjoying a lovely 80 degree day, I returned from a 2-hour bike ride to find my truck window smashed. The only thing taken was my change of clothes. My insurance company says it'll cost $1000 to replace the window. I feel like I got robbed twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 303

You deserved it 219

Today, I went to pick my daughter up from school, only to find that a contractor had parked his car across my driveway. After squeezing my car out, I went to drive out of my street, only to find it had been blocked off. I drove in the other direction to find that a bulldozer was blocking the other end. FML

I agree, your life sucks 869

You deserved it 130

Today, I got lost in a foreign city while on vacation and couldn't communicate with anyone, because I didn't speak the language and no one seemed to be able, or even wanted, to speak to me in mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 335

You deserved it 1 002