Love: Today, I went to my cousin's wedding. The groom walked over when...

By Denki - 30/01/2013 12:21 - China - Beijing

Today, I went to my cousin's wedding. The groom walked over when the two of us were talking, took one good look at me, slapped me on the ass, and said, "You know, if I wasn't marrying Rose here, you'd be next." Yeah, about that: I'm a 16-year old guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 153

You deserved it 4 513

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Same thing different taste

By derranged - 22/04/2009 18:24 - China

Today, I was the best man at a wedding and I was flirting with a cute bridesmaid. Then this old guy decides to give the newlyweds a toast. He made a crappy joke and barely anybody laughed. So I say to the girl, "Wow that sucked, who the hell does he think he is?" The girl replies, "That's my dad". FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 215

You deserved it 73 444

Pure class

By Scarred4lyfe - 28/02/2016 22:32 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, my cousin got married. I was cold so I went to get my jacket from my car. While leaving I saw my cousin walking around the front of the venue. I told her she looked beautiful in her dress. She looked up and said, "Where is my beer, have you seen my beer?" and threw up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 508

You deserved it 1 425

By O0hdear - 27/08/2015 17:44 - United States - Humble

Today, I went to my fiance's cousin's wedding with him. I got drunk and danced like a stripper in front of his entire extended family, who I'd just met that day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 540

You deserved it 32 590

By Brittany - 23/12/2012 02:33 - United States

Today, a guy professed his love for me in front of my friends. The guy is my first cousin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 645

You deserved it 3 515

By Anonymous - 31/01/2015 05:38 - United States - Brenham

Today, I got married. My grandpa took me aside afterwards and said that the moment the ceremony was over, he heard my wife's vagina slam shut. "Welcome to marriage, sucker," he chuckled, "It's just you and Rosy Palm now!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 331

You deserved it 3 255

By Az - 13/06/2012 00:24 - United States - Dallas

Today, I woke up to a guy outside my house, who wanted to give me flowers and take me out on a date. Aside from it all being pretty fucking creepy anyway, the guy is my not quite right in the head second cousin, who's apparently now head-over-heels in love with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 917

You deserved it 2 383

The show must go on!

By Stuckwiththebill - 28/01/2018 01:30

Today, during my wedding ceremony, the groom-to-be found it appropriate to blurt out about an ongoing affair with my maid of honor. They got married instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 606

You deserved it 432

Forever Alone

By Lisa - 19/08/2018 23:30

Today, at my younger sister's wedding, my hospitalised grandmother called to ask if I have a boyfriend yet, both my parents wondered if I'll ever get married, and when the 13-year-old next to me caught the bouquet, his father yelled from the back to give it to me instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 899

You deserved it 218

By jacey chreyest - 14/02/2014 21:57 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I married the love of my life. I was ecstatic until the wedding reception, where my new husband got drunk and started crying about how he'd been "forced" into marrying me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 750

You deserved it 5 008

Weirdo

By whateven333 - 18/02/2015 04:02 - United States - Gibsonia

Today, I told my cousin that I would gladly help him get through the loss of my aunt. That is until he started flirting with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 909

You deserved it 2 682

tanekdrachonae 19

Wednesday 30 January 2013 18:50

Maybe he knew -.-

Coop817 19

Wednesday 30 January 2013 18:55

YDI for being so darn cute ;)

Comments

whatafuckup 14

Wednesday 30 January 2013 18:56

heard of a joke?

brittyboo123 35

Wednesday 30 January 2013 18:59

Maybe if they divorce, you will be next OP.

RedPillSucks 31

Wednesday 30 January 2013 19:01

When he said "You'd be next" did he say it with a twinkle in his eye, or was it a twitch?

limitedition 25

Wednesday 30 January 2013 19:03

It was a joke OP.... Hopefully...

5000kings 2

Wednesday 30 January 2013 19:05

You should cut your hair

j_cat187 19

Wednesday 30 January 2013 19:10

It's alright op, you'll find the right man someday.

DRush_fml 12

Wednesday 30 January 2013 19:13

I would have taken that as a complement

rattusrattus 18

Wednesday 30 January 2013 19:37

A very worrying compliment... I mean, the groom clearly has no sense of personal space AND is hitting on other people at his own wedding. Either the guy's a total creep or he has one hell of a skeevy sense of humour.