Today, I went running. My girlfriend was so surprised at the fact that I'm exercising that she accused me of making it up so I could cheat on her. I'm just trying to get in shape. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my wife accused me of cheating. Why? Because I recently started working out, and according to her, no married man tries to improve his physique unless he's trying to look good for other women. FML
Today, I felt like going to the gym. I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to come with me. She screamed at me for supposedly implying that she's fat. No, I just wanted to go to the gym with someone. FML
Today, I lied to the treadmill about my weight. FML
Today, I decided to get back into shape and go for a run. With a 1/4 mile left to run, I saw a hot chick a block ahead of me running. Trying to show off I ran hard and passed her stopping just outside my complex. I started to throw up right as she came past me because I had run so hard to pass her. FML
Today, I actually feel good about my decisions and my life. I've even started running to improve my health, and recover from self harming. My girlfriend is convinced I'm running to hurt myself, and won't let me near any health food or the treadmill. FML
Today, I told my fiancée I was going to the gym. She gave me a dozen "quick, easy errands" that took me over three hours to finish. When I was done, I called her and said I was going to the gym now. She yelled, "You still haven't gone? You've been out for days! What have you been doing?" FML
Today, I've been an avid gym-goer since I was in high school. A year ago I convinced my girlfriend to start going to the gym with me and she had been sticking to it since. She has now has left me for a full-on fitness model she met there. He helped her start an online store, which is doing well. FML
Today, I went on a run with my crush. She expressed how happy she was to have a decent running partner, because the last one kept complaining he thought he might throw up. We got to the top of the hill and I puked right in front of her. FML
Today, feeling out of shape, I went for a jog. I got mugged. FML
Today, my girlfriend put her hand on my abs and confessed that she was glad I'd secretly started working out. I couldn't bring myself to admit that I've been constipated for three weeks. FML
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Top comments
robc32ca 4
sorry bud she'll never trust you
Cinn_fml 23
If she's that insecure I think you need to reevaluate the relationship. Or, you could go running with her to both exercise and spend time together...though there is a more effective exericise you could do together.
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Comments (159)
superbadd 0
Why say he's fat? You don't have to be fat to be out of shape. Damn you anti-flood nazis!!
superbadd 0
I wasn't talking to anyone in particular. And I disagree on the fat guy thing, skinny guys are more attractive to me.
superbadd 0
Yeah
cucumberfabulous 7
What's up with every one saying 'Anti Flood Nazis"? I don't get it.. what does that mean..... hmmm
Cinn_fml 23
Anti-Flood is part of the comment software, it prevents people commenting in quick succession, which can be a tad irritating sometimes. Where the Nazi bit comes from, I can't help.
kateleen16 0
lol, fail..
kateleen16 0
maybe she likes her guys big
Dramori 29
12 has a weiner?! FYL OP, tell her you are getting fit so you can get a new hotter GF that isn't a psycho.
SummerBlitz 0
haha giant bears? lol!! good example!! :o ahaha stupid anti-flood!! >:/
the_Flirt 0
were u talkin to me 39?
superbadd 0
Whoever assumes he's fat. So let's see hrmm yepp.
nayr9 0
haa
the_Flirt 0
o
superbadd 0
btw I like ur hair :)
the_Flirt 0
lol thnx ;) I like ur pic
superbadd 0
thnx, im going to change it though, hopefully soon. -_- there goes the anti-flood Nazis again.
the_Flirt 0
o y ?
superbadd 0
cuz i'm tired of it nd I have a way better pic